Tension escalated in gym class when the PE teacher picked two captains and asked them to select their teams. Some kids waved their arms, shouting “Pick me! Pick me!” The rest of us stood in a lump of wanna-be-picked, wearing the best expression of pleading we could muster. No one doubted the physically coordinated would be chosen first, but once they were in place behind their captains, those of us who were left felt our palms begin to sweat and our egos begin to bruise.
Being left until the very end, the last-man-standing, was about as humiliating as it could get for a young school kid. We all wanted to be picked before it came to that. Anything but that!
But what if we’re picked for something we don’t want? When Nate and I first learned about his cancer, it took a few days for the harsh truth to sink in. We were stunned, saddened, shocked. We went home and googled for facts about the disease and immediately thereafter began treatment.
Hearing it, researching it, treating it. Boom, boom, boom.
While we were focused on jumping through those hoops of misery, Nate received a letter from a close friend: “We love you and want to encourage you during these difficult days. At the same time, we know the Lord makes no mistakes. Nate, it’s hard for me to say this, but I feel he has selected you to be his testimony to many…”
Selected. Chosen. Picked… to experience terminal pancreatic cancer. None of us wants to be singled out for this team. All of us would rather be the last-man-standing.
His letter knocked us flat, but as we talked about Nate’s friend’s words, it dawned on us he was probably right. God doesn’t afflict people with diseases just for the fun of it. There’s only one reason he would allow such anguish to take over a life and eventually take that life, and it would be to bring about something valuable as a result.
The more I think about the letter and the author’s statement that Nate was “selected” to suffer cancer and die as an example to many, the more I’m amazed at God. He chose Nate, and he chose well, because Nate was an excellent example of how to live through affliction. He didn’t fall apart even when he knew death was near. There was no railing against God, no angry “why me?” and no giving way to despair. He was a superb model of how to suffer and die, and he finished well.
The letter continued: “You can be God’s testimony to our and your children, those you work with, and Sunday school kids you have taught. We are praying your testimony will honor the Lord, even when you are weak and in pain.”
That friend’s prayers were answered. Nate never thought of himself as an example while he was busy tackling one day at a time, but already we’ve seen good things happen as a result of his life and death. People have been encouraged to persevere through their own conflicts and struggles, citing him as the oomph behind their willingness to keep trying. Some have begun the difficult process of pondering their own mortality. Others have taken a new look at God and his ways.
Nate’s being chosen to suffer in front of the rest of us as an example was, in a way, a privilege. That’s because the Lord considered him able to handle it. And because Nate accepted it as God’s will and took on the challenge with courage, the cancer’s power to devastate and destroy was negated. I’m sure the enemy’s anger was fierce as Nate’s foundation didn’t wobble under the worst possible stress. And the credit for that goes to God,who had prepared him ahead of time by setting his feet firmly on the Rock.
“[The Lord] set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.” (Psalm 40:2b-3)
