Back when I was in grad school learning to write captivating ad copy, we were taught a lesson on roadside billboard advertising. Highway billboards are unique in the ad world because of the few seconds of opportunity advertisers have to get their message across.

In order for fast-moving drivers to absorb a road-sign’s idea and information, a billboard should have 8 words or less on it, along with a simple but compelling picture. Color choices are important (yellow on black is the most arresting), and plain is always better than fancy.

Driving from Chicago back to Michigan recently, a clever billboard caught my eye. The speed limit was 70, and the ad was nestled in a row of 6-7 other billboards, so there were probably less than 3 seconds to focus on any particular sign. Nevertheless, I “got it.”

The photo, covering half the billboard, was of a clear drinking glass full of water and… a set of false teeth. Big bright letters said, “Don’t die with your teeth in a glass.”

I laughed out loud and have to say I don’t remember what any of the other billboards said, but I’m still chuckling over that one. The advertiser, the one paying the bill for that sign to sit on the side of the expressway would love to hear from me, I’m sure. The only trouble is, I can’t remember who it was.

Although there were additional words beneath the headline and the photo telling me how to avoid dying with my teeth in a glass, I never got a chance to read them. I assume they promoted a local dentist and vaguely thought I saw the word “implant”, but a name, web address, or phone? Didn’t get any of those for one reason:

TMI.

The billboard, clever that it was, had been funded by wasted money. Even if I knew it was an ad for a dentist, I didn’t find out which one. Although I was willing to absorb that information, my car had whizzed past before I could read it all.

Is God ever guilty of giving us too much information? Actually the opposite is true. We usually want more than he gives us. Maybe if we did have more, it would clutter up his main message to us and we’d end up with nothing. Or maybe a Bible that was 6” thick wouldn’t be read at all.

God gives us the need-to-know info and classifies the rest as TMI. One day, though, I believe he’ll give us all the details about everything, finally satisfying our currently insatiable desire for more. When that happens, we’ll be grinning ear-to-ear…

…just like a toothless person who’s been given a mouthful of gleaming white implants.

“Jesus did many… things. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written.” (John 21:25)