Many friends have expressed an interest in our children, where they are, what they’re doing and how they’re coping with having lost their father. Today I opened 56 envelopes in a three week stack of mail accumulated while I was gone. I left the hand written envelopes till last, knowing they’d be best. Among them was one from our firstborn, Nelson.
It was a letter he’d written in February, just before leaving the country for six months. I knew the gist of it, but as I read it in my quiet cottage with twilight settling outside the sunroom windows, my heart nearly burst to realize anew what God had done in this son’s heart and life.
Nelson is a strong believer in Christ, spiritually mature, passionate about the Bible and full of wisdom, but he wasn’t always that way. As a teen he rebelled wildly, yanking Nate and I into police stations and court rooms with his antics and eventually running away from home. He made one bad choice after another over years of time, accumulating the related natural consequences. But somewhere along the way, Nelson heard God calling his name and made the decision to surrender his life and follow him, no matter what.
It hasn’t been easy, but he’s stuck like glue to that commitment, craving time with, and knowledge of God over everything else. As I wept with joy over this son in whose life God holds preeminence, I was encouraged to keep praying for those who are still resisting. Following Christ can be difficult for young men, because they are taught to lead. But as I’ve seen in Nelson, God rewards the surrendered. Please allow me to quote from Nelson’s letter, which will answer questions about how he’s doing:
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“On September 22, my Dad told me his back surgery would be delayed because the doctor found cancer in his pancreas. I raced to Michigan to be with him and Mom. For the next 42 days I watched my amazing family gather together and rally around my Dad as he clung to life on earth, and as he eventually let go to be with Jesus.
For November and December, I stayed in Michigan with Mom. We had dinner and a fire almost every night and spent lots of time talking about Papa while the rest of the ‘kids’ came and went on the weekends. During this time, I spent time praying about the next thing.
On my birthday I got an email from a Youth With A Mission (YWAM) friend who asked if I would consider working on staff with a Discipleship Training School (DTS) out of Oxford, New Zealand. Actually, she’d been asking for at least a year, but I always turned down the opportunity. This time she persisted. She told me they were short on male leaders and reminded me I had previous experience (1996-1998, leading teams to Japan, Korea, the Philippines and India). I had always hoped God would call me back at some point.
So I prayed and decided to get a second opinion from my ‘home’ church in Brentwood, TN. After gaining their support and that of my family, I agreed to go to New Zealand. My job on staff is a combination of being a facilitator, leading discussion groups, being the worship leader, planning outreach mission projects, supervising student work duties and accompanying the group as they travel across the world from New Zealand to Jerusalem where graduation will occur 8/20/10. This is the opportunity of a lifetime for these young people as they get to serve under several long-term missionaries and see the world in the process. Only God knows what vision and ministries might be birthed as we go.”
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When Nelson was praying into his decision in January and February, God regularly sent concrete nudges toward a “yes”. Nelson followed that leading and decided to go. Immediately afterwards, a most powerful confirmation message came from the grave, from his own father, in an unusual way.
Nate’s close friend Wayne visited four days before Nate died, flying up from Florida to do so. As they brought each other up to date on their children, Wayne took note of Nate’s words about each of ours. On February 11, just after Nelson had decided on missions, an email from Wayne popped into my inbox: ”The thing I remember most [in the details about the kids] was Nate’s prediction that Nelson would return to mission work, and how proud he was that he would do so.”
I forwarded this gratifying confirmation to Nelson (who was then helping a friend in Honolulu) and marveled at God’s amazing creativity. For Nelson to be cheered on by his father at this important life road-fork was a gift-wrapped package from the heavenly Father. (And thank you, Wayne!)
Who says life as a Christian is boring? Today it was so thrilling, I couldn’t even hold it in. It spilled out in tears of joy.
I remember thinking as a child that if I committed my life completely to the Lord He would require me to be a missionary. After seeing so many missionary families with outdated clothes and hearing their stories of foreign and quite inconvenient living conditions I knew I did not want to go to Africa. God always has the last laugh. I changed my major to missions while at Moody Bible Institute.
As a missions major we used to discuss where God might lead us. Many of us jokingly spoke of “suffering for the Lord” in the Bahamas or on a Pacific island somewhere.
Though my early perception of our heavenly Father was warped God always gives us what is best. Great things and adventures await you, Nelson, in the place that was backdrop for the land of Narnia. Please keep your mother stocked with news of God’s activity in New Zealand and especially photos to feed her gluttony and her blog.
How great to hear of Nelson’s desire to fully follow God. It is so encouraging to hear of a wayward son that God has called so wonderfully to Himself. I am encouraged to continue to hope and pray for my sons. Thanks.
Two things were pounded in my head as a new Christian:
1. seek first His kingdom
2. only two things last forever- people and the Word of God
I lived my life by those truths throughout college and into early adulthood. I would say the entanglements of life have gotten in the way of that as suburbia and all of it’s transitory demands have overtaken me.
Nelson lives those principles as he has loosened the hold of all the trappings and trippings that slow us down in the race. He is a lean and focused runner.
Lots of people have slow starts- it’s the finish that matters.
Today’s blog is both an indictment and an inspiration.
Love,
Terry
How faithful God is to keep pursuing our loved ones, and how encouraging when they give themselves to Him!
Thank you Margaret..AGAIN…for writing into the lives of those who are reading, and praying and possibly grieving over their own children’s choices. We have just yesterday left Jos, Nigeria, where we witnessed firsthand the lives of believers, converted by missionaries years ago and now standing firm in the face of unbelievable persectuion for that faith. The Sunday massacre of hundreds of Christian women and children (while their husbands stood guard around the village in the pre-dawn hours) has rocked the nation, but not the faith for which they are paying an enormous price. As we witnessed the mass burial of entire families, including a 4-day old infant in its mother’s arms, the reality of heaven earned for us thru the death of a Son, is fueling the church to reach out to its very enemies with the Gospel, and show supernatural love to those bent on its destruction. When we send missionaries, it is to this kind of a heart breaking life….but life, that is truly life. Nelson, you are in our prayers in a new way, for we are asking God to put joy in your heart and steel in your soul.
Dear Margaret,
Today I’m catching up on your blog and was especially inspired by this post in which you share Nelson’s spiritual journey. God has answered your pleas to the Lord on his behalf. His story encourages me to press on in intercession for my own children, trusting that God’s plan for them is good and that he will “complete the good work” which he began in them. I rejoice with you for the fruit you are seeing in and through Nelson’s life, as he follows his Master.
What a joy to your mother’s heart!! We rejoice and cry with you too…it’s a good thing.