November 3rd is the day Nate left earth for heaven, or, as some say, changed his address. We’ve all missed him for 5 years, and I still wish we had him back.
It’s too bad I can’t mail him a letter telling him so. If I could send something to his new address, I’d be writing every single day, just like any couple in a loving relationship who find themselves separated by distance. I’d tell him what’s going on in his family and describe the many ways each of us misses him. I’d keep him up-to-date on current events and on this blog, telling him of the many readers who have come to know him through its posts.
But of course trying to send a letter to heaven is even sillier than trying to reach Santa Claus. Even if I could fling a letter heaven-ward and somehow get it to Nate, I’d still have the frustration of never getting one back from him. In my 5 years without him, it’s talking to him that I miss the most. But our communicating has come to an end, at least until I rejoin him one day.
Nate was a good conversationalist and enjoyed everything from table talk with family to chit-chat with strangers. He was always willing to hash over problems, and no subjects were off limits. If I could count the discussions we would have had if he’d been here these last 5 years, they would number a thousand-plus.
And yet God hasn’t left me or any of us without people to talk to during these years, chief of which is himself. Naturally, talking to the Lord isn’t the same as talking to Nate, but in certain respects, it’s better. God is “open for business” day and night and is an expert listener. And since no time is a bad time to approach him for a talk, those thousand-plus conversations are still available.
When I think of Nate’s advice and how I wish I knew what he would say about this or that today, I can go to the Lord and voice the same longings or problems with the same openness and honesty, knowing he’ll hear my heart’s intention and never misunderstand me. I won’t be criticized, and the counsel he’ll give will be flawless.
Someday I anticipate looking into Nate’s face again and having a fresh conversation with him. We might even be able to pick up where we left off. More than likely, though, it won’t be anything like I’m envisioning, but God definitely promises eventual togetherness.
As I move into the 6th year of being separated from Nate, I’m hoping God will teach me to communicate with him better and better. And I hope one day he’ll completely fill the void left behind when Nate changed his address from earth to heaven.
Jesus said, “You can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it.” (Matthew 21:22)
Thinking of you and your entire family as you all remember with joy and yet grieve at the same time.
As our dear friend Elisabeth Elliot is known to say,”Do the next thing,” you have carried on in honoring Nate in so many wonderful ways. Although we dearly miss loved ones, whether it is five or twelve years or 34 months, our precious Lord will never stop being our Comforter…keeping us occupied with the gladness
of our hearts. Ecc. 5:20
I can’t tell you how many times Elisabeth Elliot’s advice, “Do the next thing”, has helped me through many hard times since my husband went to be with the Lord. The best advice I’ve been given comes from Proverbs 3, verses 5 and 6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.”
God brought those verses to my attention about a year before my husband’s accident and subsequent death. I didn’t know at the time what they were for but God did. I saw them in books I was reading, on little plaques in someone’s home. I heard them in sermons and read them in greeting cards. Everywhere I looked God showed them to me. God has proved the truth in them over and over to me in the two and a half years since my husband’s death. I praise Him and give Him all the glory!
My husband went on home ahead of me 33 weeks ago today. I miss my best friend but he is no longer in pain.
What a tribute to Nate and to you! A good reminder that our Lord is present always. Thank you for your blogs. Love KB
Thinking about you today and know how much you must miss hearing Nate’s voice. Your blog continues to bless me in so many ways. God bless you Margaret.
Several times this week I have been brought to the scriptures promising that His (Gods) love endures forever. I doubt we will ever get over the loss of a beloved mate but thank God He will never leave us.
Special thoughts and prayers have been with you today, as well as continued gratitude for the blessing you have been in my life.
Lana
From the beginning of the Old Testament throughout the bible, God vows to be a husband to the widow and father to the orphan;
he becomes our constant companion, provider, protector, judge,
and admonishes those who neglect, take advantage of, or abuse them in ANY way. He is EL SHADDAI !!
Margaret, I have had you in my prayers at this time, too, and I believe you are right on ‘track’. He has been ‘steadily filling that void’, with your family additions, being given the ability to write your book (s) – blog, become who He created you to be, and I believe Nate is right there looking over your shoulder all the way! Most assuredly, there is nothing like feeling his arms around you, or physically seeing his face, but in your quiet times, ENVISION..him, God will provide your EVERY NEED.
I pray for you, and every other widow who reads your blog, will feel the saturation of the Holy Spirit when you are overcome with lonliness or grief or just ‘missing kissing’, as you put it in your book, and restore your JOY and let God, your husband, take you on your journey of becoming who HE created YOU to be, during this season called ‘widowhood’..