An 800-Mile Day

The girls and I are singing “On the Road Again” en route to Florida for two reasons: (1) a second visit to seven week old Micah, 20 month old Skylar and their parents, and (2) a few days on Sanibel Island with Mary and Bervin. Their two youngest girls and ours will revel in exploring the island on rented scooters, as well as spending refreshing time on the shelly beach.

As for me, a Cyclops-lookalike with a colorful goose-egg, I’ll be on the screened porch waiting for my battered face to quit oozing. The doctor said, “No sun for you, unless you want half of your face to absorb an extra amount of ultraviolet rays and become permanently stained.” I already look like Two-face, the deformed villain in Batman’s “Dark Knight” and don’t need that.

As we packed and loaded up this morning, doing all those last-minute chores before departure, I realized anew why my widow warrior friends have told me they like to stay home. After walking through months of unknowns getting used to widowhood, these women are tentatively holding onto shreds of a new routine when suddenly it’s time to break stride and leave on a trip, yet another unknown.

In addition, widows like to pass their days where their husband used to be and sleep where he used to sleep, maybe even in his t-shirt. Going too far away for too long becomes tense and unsettling, causing mourning to be set aside for a few days, which elongates the process. It’s always waiting upon return.

Despite these stresses, the girls and I are looking forward to a dose of tropical weather after this sad, snowy winter, and my broken toe will be happier in flip flops than in shoes. Once again my magnanimous sister and husband are providing for us in a special way, offering bedrooms at a restful resort, urging us to come. Without them, we wouldn’t go.

Our road trip was interesting today. I’ve learned what it feels like to be the object of gawkers. “Don’t stare,” one mom told her little girl as we waited in line for the gas station bathroom. Most are sure I’ve been battered by an angry man and show compassion. One woman saw my face and lovingly said, “Oh honey, let me help you into the store,” rushing back to open the door before I got there. She had all she could do not to embrace me. When I saw another little girl with a scab on her face staring at me, I smiled and said, “You don’t look as bad as I do,” but she turned and ran.

Louisa did all the driving without complaint, and the girls walked the dogs as needed. Compared to traveling with little children, we had it easy. I just hope when we connect with Skylar tomorrow afternoon she doesn’t take one look at Grandma Midgee and go screaming to her daddy in terror!
”The Lord, before whom I have walked, will send his angel with you and make your journey a success,” (Genesis 24:40a)

7 thoughts on “An 800-Mile Day

  1. Aww, I bet Sky will be ecstatic to have her Grandma Midgee and aunties and TWO dogs to play with. If she treats you like she’s currently treating her dolls, crayons and books she’ll pat you gently and say “don’t cry, shhh!”

  2. sWith her fantastic memory, she will know your voice, and probably run to the door and say “wash car, Skylar wash car, Midge” She’ll look at you intently and hug you anyway..delighted to see you all, I’m quite sure of it !!
    Happy trails!

  3. Margaret –
    So sorry about your accident. (BTW: I still love bike riding – reminds me of my younger days.) But good to remember “this, too, shall pass”, and it will. Your sunny spirit will shine through the bruises. I’ll bet Skylar and family will be thrilled to be with you and your girls.

  4. I trust Sanibel Island does not offer windsurfing, snorkeling, cliff diving, or jet skiing. Hold her back, Mary and Bervin. 🙂
    Love,
    Terry

  5. Ahhh to be on Sanibel! But to be there and avoid the sun?? How hard is that! I am sure you will put your indoor time to good use–but do rest too. Have a wonderful time. Where are you all staying? We are talking about a June trip with Lora and the family.

  6. Margaret,

    Once again you have “nailed it” when explaining the conflicting feelings that go along with taking trips as a new widow. Since Ted died, I’ve been blessed to travel to NYC with friends in a church senior group and have been to my sister’s house in Virginia twice. These trips were wonderful and I’m so glad I could go, but your description of those complex emotions perfectly describe what I have felt (and couldn’t seem to articulate). As you can see, I’m still reading your earlier blogs and greatly benefitting from them. Of course, I am still reading your current ones, too, but for some reason I’m no longer receiving email notifications of them, so I am going to sign up for them again.

    Enjoy your time with family, especially precious Isaac!

  7. Woah! I’m really digging the template/theme of this website.

    It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s hard to get that “perfect balance”
    between usability and appearance. I must say you have done a awesome job with this.
    Additionally, the blog loads very quick for me on Chrome.
    Outstanding Blog!