Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

I (Mary) knew that as a mom it was my responsibility to “train up my child in the way he should go” as the old King James Version puts it (Proverbs 22:6). So I got busy with my kids, preschoolers included, teaching them to make their beds. I knew once they mastered that, they’d feel good about themselves, and I’d feel good about giving them a valuable habit they could use the rest of their lives.

Knowing young children can’t be expected to do well at chores beyond their capabilities, I simplified the process to include only a fitted sheet, a blanket, and a pillow, never expecting them to change the sheets, just to make the beds.

I gathered the children and said, “I’m going to show you how to make your own beds.”

They responded with enthusiasm. “I wanna try!”

But day after day the beds remained unmade, so I thought I’d sweeten the deal. “Who wants a candy treat?”

Again, enthusiasm prevailed.

“When I see your beds made, I’ll put a candy on your pillow.”

They all agreed.

I thought bed-making could be learned after just one lesson, but even with the candy, most of the kids worked at it for weeks before faithfully doing it, sometimes taxing my patience. In the end, only Andrew adopted it as a regular habit. His room was often in shambles, but his bed was always made.

SIDEBAR: TRAINING TOOLS TO USE

• A fun challenge
• Complimentary words
• Rewards
• Punishment
• Gentle reprimand