In this entry Nelson talks about his favorite thing to do.
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October 1, 2022
Thank you for Annso and that she’s young enough to have children and I can be a father. What a huge blessing. Many guys my age are getting remarried to women with older kids and have older kids themselves. That’s reality. I’m grateful for where I am, even though it’s a lot of work. Of course right now, she does the majority of it and never complains at all.
These days I have to set boundaries [about visitors], which works, but it’s this guilty feeling for pushing away people who love me and are nice, but most of the time it’s just too much. I dismiss it to the cancer, saying to myself, “I just do it because I’m not feeling great.” But that might not always be true. Lord, help me not to be selfish, but to set the right boundaries. I don’t know how to do it, but you do.
I love having uninterrupted time with Annso and Little Will. That’s my favorite. Just the 3 of us. Today is Saturday, and it took me until last night to even realize it was Friday when people were talking about the weekend.
We are having trouble getting the chemo drugs refilled by the insurance company again. We have to go to a different pharmacy now. A little red tape, but I know you will help us Lord. You have had them pay for everything so far. We have been so fortunate in that way. I can hardly believe they have covered everything. Thank you.
8:00 pm – Will screamed for a full 25 minutes tonight, then when he heard us cleaning up dinner, again for another 10. It’s quite impressive, really, but so stressful as parents. God knew what he was doing when he created crying and the way it sounds.
That blood-curdling screaming a 6 month old can belt out is something else. If I screamed like that for 5 or 6 breaths, I’d probably be in the hospital with a brain aneurysm, and he does it like it’s nothing for 30 minutes straight.
He can do it for a full hour. But going in to him accomplishes nothing but teaches him to cry more often to get Annso to come in and hold him at the drop of a hat.
I’m all for the Cry It Out philosophy. It works, and if you don’t do it, you can easily see what the parents who don’t let them cry it out have to deal with. They get no time together in the evenings, and the little ones stay up until 11 or 12 midnight. The poor parents are waiting until the child decides they’re ready to go to bed. No thanks.
On a different note, I am going another step off the morphine slow-release. It’s not because I care about taking morphine, because you can’t even feel anything from it. Nonetheless, you sure can tell when you cut the slow release out.
I feel like I have a flu with all my energy sapped. It’s tough and lasts about a week after the pill. I’m familiar with it because I went from 30 to 15mg and now, from 2 per day to 1 in the mornings only.
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“There is a time for every matter under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1)