Growing up, I couldn’t have asked for more. I was wanted and welcomed into my family and have no excuses for the bad stuff I’ve done, no one to blame for my mistakes.
Being born as the second girl, I once pressed Dad to tell me the truth. “Were you disappointed I wasn’t a boy?”
When he paused before answering I said, “So… you were.”
“Only for 60 seconds,” he said. And I took him at his word.
That was the undercurrent of our father-daughter relationship. Although he was generally pleased with me, when I disappointed him, it lasted only about 60 seconds. I never once doubted his love.
Mom was his opposite, remaining a kid at heart even at 92. She dressed in costume for every holiday, and loved playing games and practical jokes. She often told me, “You make me laugh!” Coming from a woman who never muffed a punch line, that was high praise.
Eventually I became the middle child, a great place to be. Firstborns have to lead, and babies never get out from under that label. The middle kid can bounce along beneath parental radar, no problem.
If I was asked to give a one-word summary of my childhood, it would be “secure”. I wasn’t ridiculed at home, labeled as something I wasn’t or compared to my more intelligent siblings. My friends were always welcome, even in droves, and when decisions were being made, my opinion was heard.
So?
Big deal.
Who cares?
It does matter, and here’s why. God blesses people for only one reason: to bless other people. Everything I’ve been given wasn’t/isn’t mine, including the intangibles. It all belonged and still belongs to God.
Sadly, I’ve often failed to be responsible in passing along the goodies that came to me. It wasn’t as if my folks weren’t continually modeling the giving principle. Dad would solicit our help in spreading out the charity envelopes he accumulated throughout each year, in preparation for slipping a check into each one. It seemed like a great deal of giving to me, since there were dozens of different charities represented. But I guess that’s the point he was quietly trying to make.
And Mom gave herself away in countless ways, first to other people’s children but then to neighbors, friends, strangers, the needy, the elderly. She was modeling what she hoped I would be eager to give away years hence.
My entire life ought to be about serving and giving. Because it’s not, I’m falling short. My folks sat on committees and boards, taught Sunday school, stood for Christ in the neighborhood, entertained weekly and worked hard every day.
Mom used to tell us she dreaded shaking hands with a preacher because her calloused, rough skin might injure his petal-soft palms. But Dad worked just as hard at his engineering firm, despite having soft hands. Both of them modeled valuable, virtuous habits.
Maybe there’s still time for me. Both Mom and Dad lived into their 90’s, so if I figure it out fairly soon, I might have one-third of my life to get it right.
“When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” (Luke 12:48b)
the middle child is always the best!!! margaret and i are proof.
I can think of plenty of ways you’ve served, just like Grandpa and Grandma J. But I love that you want to do more. And hooray for middle children!
Your life is heavily sprinkled with all the generosity of time/energy/money which you have given. It is easy to believe that our sense of significance is defined by what we do instead of by who we are “being” as God created us to be. Embrace this season of being “a Mary”, sitting at Jesus feet, and just be a human being instead of a human doer. There will be moments in this season when He will use you as His vessel. He does so now through your blog. This is a season for you to “be still and know that He is God”, to rest in Him and just “to be”. He desires intimate fellowship with all of us. Most of the time, we humans miss that because we are so busy performing to earn His approval and love or to fulfil our definition of value and significance. Comparing ourselves to how others walk in the Lord or live their lives can either inspire us or cause to miss the fulfillment of knowing who we are in Him and who He is in us. The book “He Loves Me” gives a great illustration of this. You are a daily blessing and encouragement to all of us!
It is nice that, at our age, we can still be trying to think what to do with our lives.
Love the pictures you post, Margaret. I look at you as a child and see Linnea. She can look forward to being gorgeouser(?)every day like you as she gets older.
Our parents did not have the internet, and the Lord has provided just an instrument as this for you to give to many people all over the world everyday. whether it is a word of encouragement, a thought for us to apply to our lives or something to remind us of a simpler day you enter our homes and minister to us when we read your blog and reflect on the thoughts and Scripture. Also when you describe your Mom who I can remember benefiting from, it sounds so much like what my kids remember from receiving from you in your home. This next year it will be interesting to see what God has planned for you.
I’m with Connie. I don’t think you have any idea how much you minister to those of us who are your friends and read your blog. Also, give yourself this year to begin to walk the path of Widowhood w/God. It’s a full time job, my dear friend!
Picture me as an envelope. I am one of the readers that benefits every day from what you write. God gets the glory for the growth that happens, but you have definitely been a willing giver. I thank God for His work in you (and in me). Amen to Connie’s post.
Margaret, don’t kid yourself!:) You have given and continue to give in countless ways. Loving and praying for my kids (even including them at Afterflow!) , counseling me during tough days, and on and on.:):):) Jif and I look forward to seeing Linni today. Friendships from heaven.:) Love to you! Sue