When I was in 6^th grade, Marjie Simmons was my best friend. One school day we were outside during recess when she said, “Something bad’s gonna happen.”

“What?” I said.

“We have to move.”

I was speechless. Marjie told me she wouldn’t be going to 7^th grade with me, because she’d be living hundreds of miles away. This was devastating. When I told Mom, she kindly sympathized, but Dad said, “What’s all the fuss about? Before long you’ll forget all about her.”

My eleven-year-old heart was broken, because in my mind Marjie would always be #1. The thought of forgetting her was beyond comprehension. Dad’s comment bothered me for a long time, but of course he hadn’t meant any harm. What he did mean was that the sadness of Marjie’s departure wouldn’t last long, since other girlfriends would take her place. Although he hadn’t spoken with much tact, he was right.

I often wonder about Marjie. Where is she now? What has her life been like? Marjie probably moved away from our friendship as fast as I did, because children go through life changes like water through a funnel. They’re not the only ones changing, though. We adults change, too, which is good. The opposite would be sluggishness and eventually stagnation, and no one wants those.

A child’s goals are reachable: learning to walk, tying a bow, writing a name. Later it’s a little more work: conquering a sport, getting a license, buying a car. Once the childhood goals are met, things get downright complicated: choosing a career, finding a mate, conquering a bad habit. And every bit of it is change requiring growth.

Underneath the constant changing ought to be a quest for growth of intangible but lasting value: a desire to help someone in need, love the unlovable, explore a relationship with God.

My sister Mary and I once had a talk about our prayer lives. Comparing ourselves to Mom, who prayed a great deal, we were pathetic. We rode on her coattails for years. But God convicted both of us, and eventually we responded to his prayer invitation.

Then Mom died. We found ourselves wondering who would fill the prayer-void Mom left behind, especially in reference to requests made for our families.

“Maybe that’s us?” I said.

“And we got there just in time,” Mary added.

Although that change was long in coming, it’s one example of adult growth. We all have change-choice options. I should always be asking, “How can I do better? Where can I grow? What does God want me to do?” To follow his lead is to avoid a stall or stagnation.

Marjie Simmons and I quickly grew apart as kids, exactly as Dad had predicted. If we met again, it’s probable we both would have changed radically since our days together in 6^th grade. But all that change might just be good enough to bring us together as brand new friends.

Hmmm. I wonder if I could find Marjie on Facebook…

”We ask God to give you complete knowledge of his will and to give you spiritual wisdom and understanding. Then… you will grow as you learn to know God better and better.” (Colossians 1:9b-10)