Today was the first Sunday of the month. Churches I’ve belonged to over the years have traditionally served communion to their congregations on the first Sunday, and whenever I’ve had the chance, I’ve participated.

But this morning’s service was decidedly thought-provoking. Maybe it was because I was away from home attending Linnea and Adam’s church in Florida. Maybe it was because the two of them were managing the baby nursery today, and I was sitting alone in the auditorium. Maybe it was the pastor’s sermon. But when it came time to walk to the front for communion, I stayed seated. Never in the 50 years since I began participating have I skipped it, until today.

This morning before we left the house for church, I read a verse from the last chapter of Isaiah. God was speaking, and he said, “These are the ones I look on in favor, those who are humble and contrite in spirit and who tremble at my Word.”

As I sat down in church, I was still thinking about that verse and especially the word “tremble”. During the service I sensed God asking me some serious questions. “How do you handle Scripture? Are you taking it for granted? How do you choose verses for your blog post each night? With humility? A contrite heart? With trembling?”

I’ve often told my kids, “Your Bible is not like any other book on the planet. It’s supernatural, alive, powerful enough to change your life. Always treat it with enormous respect.” Had I been doing that?

I love Scripture. I’ve spent years furrowing my brow trying to understand it. I’ve been to a Bible museum and seen an ancient hand-written copy, stained with the blood of someone who was killed while protecting it. I know that emperors and kings have tried to do away with it unsuccessfully, and I know its been God who’s caused it to survive. He says it’s “eternal and stands firm in the heavens.” (Psalm 119:89)

But have I ever trembled in approaching my Bible? Suddenly I felt awful. God seemed to be saying, “When you post parts of my Word each night, I want you to have a more reverent, cautious attitude. Make sure it’s me choosing the verses, not you. After all, the words are mine.”

When it came time to have communion, the pastor encouraged us to “get clean before God” first. And as I bowed my head, my eyes filled with tears, and I felt dirty. I asked him to forgive me for treating Scripture without the humility and contrite spirit he demands, and for not approaching it with trembling. I want to use his Word in a way that pleases him, and I crave his favor, as the verse says. I pleaded for him to teach me how, and I know he will.

When I looked up, several hundred people had gone forward for communion and returned to their seats. The service was over. Although I hadn’t participated, I’d done something better: gotten clean with God.

“These are the ones I look on with favor: those who are humble and contrite in spirit, and who tremble at my word.” (Isaiah 66:2b)