Newlywed Love (#79)

July 19-25, 1970

Nate and I were happy to spend some weekend time washing and waxing our sleek, black Mustang with the terrible “bad breath” — hopeful that its handsome appearance would sell it quickly. It was enjoyable working together on a project that didn’t involve mental strain, since it seemed like all we ever did was study.

Mustang grill

I felt overloaded with student teaching, seminars, and homework, but once Nate got deep into his law classes, there was no comparison as to who was busiest. He won, hands down.

Mom's letterAfter we finished the car, I opened a long letter from Mom, thanking us for their time in Champaign. She also wrote about Mary and Bervin getting a dog, a Cocker Spaniel. Rusty and Baron were becoming friends, and Mom wrote two paragraphs describing their antics.

As I read the letter, a new thought came. Did they really want to keep Baron for us, or were they just doing it as a sacrificial favor? Were we taking advantage of them by asking them to keep him?

Mom wrote, The Baron is A-OK, tearing up a box right now in the basement here. He brightens our lives.

But I pictured Mom, on her hands and knees, cleaning up shredded cardboard and I had my doubts. I knew she worried about Baron running off when they were outside and had no good answer for what they would do with him if they went on vacation.

And all of a sudden I began to cry. Nate came running and put his arms around me. “What’s the matter?”

Tuckered out Baron“I feel guilty that Mom and Dad have to keep our dog. They have to feed and house him, watch over him, and she just wrote that they took him in for his first round of puppy shots. We should be doing that.”

“Yes, but your mother really does love him – genuinely.”

“I know, but it isn’t just that.” And through tears I began remembering aloud all the ways my parents had helped us – going along with our rushed wedding plans, accepting Nate with enthusiasm, providing furniture, rugs, virtually everything in our apartment.

My familyThey had loaned us money, which moved my thoughts back to the cost of my college education… and so much more. I thought of my childhood as I grew up in an atmosphere of listening and love. Best of all, they had introduced me to Jesus Christ from the beginning, modeling lives committed to him.

As I sat with Mom’s letter in my lap and Nate’s arms around me, I sobbed and sobbed, overwhelmed with how much I’d been given and wondering if I had taken these gifts for granted. Did they know how much I appreciated everything? Had I thanked them enough?

Nate suggested I put all my thoughts into a long letter. “It’ll make you feel better to write it, and they’ll love receiving it.”

He was right, and I began. But even as I penned page after page of gratitude, my thoughts were on the Baron-dilemma.

“If you honor your father and mother, things will go well for you.” (Ephesians 6:3)

Newlywed Love (#78)

July 17-18, 1970

By the end of the week, both Nate and I were ready for a break from studies. We invited Cathy and John over for 11:00 PM ice cream sundaes and talked into the night – because they came bringing bad news.

John.John’s draft number was getting close, which wouldn’t have been a problem with his law school deferment. But he very much wanted to quit school.

Worse than that, though, was the news that John might be going blind. They’d just learned this from an eye doctor and were still reeling. John hoped the Army would give him a 1-A deferment – after which he would quit school.

The whole conversation was depressing, and since neither Cathy nor John had any spiritual underpinnings, they felt hopeless. Our best encouragement didn’t seem to help.

When Nate and I fell into bed after 2:30 AM, we held each other close and voiced our hope that these good friends would be OK and that they’d one day connect with Jesus Christ… the Giver of hope. This was our first peer-experience with a major health crisis, and it felt awful.

Mom and Dad and fondue.Saturday was much brighter, because Mom and Dad were coming – and  bringing our beloved Baron! We prepared the fondue dinner they’d requested and when they walked in, we couldn’t believe how much Baron had grown in just two weeks. Nate kissed him right on the mouth!

Mom told us that several families had asked if Baron was available for adoption. His cooperative, friendly demeanor delighted many, so Mom asked our opinion. We said absolutely not, and wisely, that’s what she’d told the others.

Allerton PkNate and I spent the night on the Murphy bed, giving Mom and Dad our room, and on Saturday morning we satisfied another parental request – a visit to Allerton Park. They’d heard us rave about it but had never been there.

 

 

 

 

Nate and DadAt one point Dad said he wanted to talk to Nate, so those two went one direction while Mom and I chased after Baron.

The 3 of them left in late afternoon, headed for yet another commitment in the Chicago area. After we waved them off, I couldn’t wait to get the details on what Dad had  talked to Nate about.

It turned out to be our poisonous Mustang.

We had continued driving it through the summer, leaving the windows down to prevent headaches. But Dad was concerned since a cooler season was coming.

“If you can sell the Mustang for a reasonable price, we can put something together without too much trouble,” he said.  “I’d like to see you in a new car for a change. But it would have to be cheaper and smaller than the cars you’ve had.”

Model A-Dad believed used cars weren’t reliable and since buying his first vehicle (a Model A Ford in the 1920’s), he’d always bought new.

By Monday morning, Nate and I had put an ad in the local paper, knowing it would be illegal not to disclose the toxic nature of our car. We priced it realistically and were flying high at the prospect of new wheels!

But our thoughts were heavy, too… because of Cathy and John.

“Lord, you know the hopes of the helpless. Surely you will hear their cries and comfort them.” (Psalm 10:17)

Newlywed Love (#75)

July 6-10, 1970

As Nate and I adjusted to life without our little “fur-pants” (Mom’s nickname for Baron), we begged Mom and Dad to bring him for a visit the very next weekend. But they were busy people, and the best they could do was 2 weeks hence.

That was good enough for us, something grand to anticipate. Mom described how she and her new little buddy were happy companions, going everywhere together. She bragged about him as if he was her child, and we loved knowing she was enjoying him that much.

Newspaper readerNate registered for two difficult summer school classes, and that same day got word back about another job – a 55-mile rural newspaper route. The boss promised he would earn $100 per week [equivalent to $25 per hour], and we were over-the-moon about it. We couldn’t believe that each hour he worked would earn as much as donating a pint of blood!

There were several conditions:

  • He’d have to use his own car, adding some serious wear and tear with the endless stops and starts.
  • He had to report to the newspaper office by 4:00 AM each day to fold and rubber-band papers, so they could slide into country mailboxes.
  • All the papers had to be delivered by 6:00 AM.

DQBut Nate had always loved newspapers, and the job seemed to be a good fit. It wouldn’t interfere with his classes and would be the steady income we needed. He didn’t hesitate to agree to the conditions, and we celebrated with Cathy and John by making a quick trip to Dairy Queen.

Life was looking up, and even my summer school was getting easier. Surprisingly, I found myself learning more than the students through my endless reading and planning each evening. And I was getting excited about trying out new educational ideas on my own students, come September.

Though we missed our darling doggie, it helped to know we would see him soon. In his absence, something interesting was happening between Nate and me.

CrazinessWhen Baron had been there to entertain us, we had focused together on his silly antics and drifted away from “entertaining” each other. But without him around, we resumed getting silly all by ourselves, just like we used to do. This focus-change was deeply satisfying to both of us.

I journaled about my renewed joy in him:

Married life is so beautiful, I keep wondering when each new day will cease to be neater than the one before! When I wake up each morning and look at Nate next to me, I about giggle with delight at seeing him there and being able to snestle with him right then and there. He’s so good looking and always so fresh and clean —

Happy journal

Nate's noteNate (Poopsie to me) began thanking me for everything from my still-strange cooking, to cleaning the bathroom sink, to washing his underwear, to sewing on a button. Married life was good indeed.

“Let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.” (1 John 3:18)