Eye-Rolling

Garage shelvesI remember the days when one or more of my children would say, “Where is my such-and-such?” I might answer with something like, “Try the basement.” (Or garage, or yard.) But like clockwork they’d quickly return saying, “Nope. Not there.”

Knowing it was, I’d send them back again, maybe with another clue. “Look about chest-high. I think I saw it there.”

But more often than not, they’d reappear. “Un-uh. Still not there.”

So I’d roll my eyes, march to the spot where the item was, put my hand right on it and say, “See? Exactly where I said it was.”

“Oh….” he/she would say. “I was looking for a box, but it was in a bag.” Or, “I was looking on the floor, but was on a shelf.” In other words, “It’s not my fault.”

Sometimes I act the same toward God. I ask a question, and he answers by giving me helpful information, like where to find peace or maybe security, or courage. But rather than carefully following his instructions I say, “Doing that doesn’t seem like it’ll bring peace.” Or, “Relying on that won’t make me feel secure.” Or, “Just believing words can’t give me courage.”

Surely God must roll his eyes. “Look where I’m telling you to find it, and you’ll find it.”

With my kids, the problem was they didn’t really want to look. Instead they wanted me to stop what I was doing, lead them to the item they were pretending to look for, and hand it directly to them. Watching this happen repeatedly produced plenty of frustration in me, exactly as it must for God when I become that same immature child.

So how can these seek-and-find scenarios be improved? What’s missing? First and foremost, a listening ear. When parents tell their children where to find something, the kids aren’t really listening to the details. They’re hoping for a quick fix, a way to get what they want without putting forth personal effort. Sadly, I’m the same way.

When I’m seeking self-control, for example, or love, or patience, God describes how to find them, but his directions usually include action at my end, and that’s both disappointing and discouraging in the moment. I want it right away and without effort. When it isn’t forthcoming, I run back to him and whine. “Nope. I don’t have it! It’s not there!”

He tells me again (and maybe again) what I must do to secure what I’m wanting, but I don’t succeed unless I “look” where he points and move in that direction. I know the Lord views us as his children, a privileged place to be. But on this issue, I want to act less like a child and more like the mature believer he hopes I will someday become.

“If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” (Proverbs 18:13)

I wanna do it!

Emerald loves to help in the kitchen. Never mind that she’s only 7 months old. When I cut up my stir-fry veggies, she likes to sit in her Bumbo on the counter next to me, banging the broccoli against the counter-top or washing the pea pods with her drool.

Emerald assists in the kitchen

If I’m holding her when I open the refrigerator, she lunges toward its contents, fascinated by the variety of colors and shapes inside. This afternoon I decided she could help as I put food away and set her Bumbo in front of the fruit and veggie drawers. She happily banged them open and closed, sucked on the bag of mini-carrots, and rattled the salad dressing bottles overhead.

No doubt Emerald thinks of herself as wonderfully capable and wonders why she isn’t allowed to do everything the rest of us do. But of course there are several problems. She’s inexperienced, unqualified, and incapable. None of that stops her, though, from wanting to try.

When our Louisa began learning to put words together, one of her first (and oft-repeated) sentences was, “I wanna do-it!”

I wanna do it...

At age two, she wanted to accomplish things with skills she thought she had but didn’t. We all saw the disparity, but of course she couldn’t understand. Her desire was strong, and when we wouldn’t let her try something we knew she couldn’t handle, her objections were loud and long. But having a big dose of want-to isn’t enough to accomplish something beyond our capabilities.

How many times do we adults proceed just like baby Emerald or toddler Louisa, ill-equipped to handle a task but diving into it anyway? We think, “Somehow it’ll all work out in the end.” And when it doesn’t, we end up more frustrated than at the beginning.

Scripture says we should count the cost before starting any endeavor, and if we aren’t able to pay the necessary price, we shouldn’t start. This can be a discouraging place to be as we’re forced to wait before taking action, but what we can do while we’re waiting is work to become fit for the undertaking.

I think of the way God works in people’s lives and know we should imitate that. He usually takes his time putting all the pieces in place before unveiling his plans for us. That’s why it seems so long between our prayer requests and his answers. He doesn’t rush to get things completed in a hurry, and he never panics, but instead proceeds in an orderly way. We should determine to do the same, programming planning-pauses into our lives.

Baby Emerald will gain in skill as she gains in months, and toddler-Louisa has grown into a capable young adult. But all of us have to learn (one way or another) that when we “wanna do it right now,” our timing could very well be off.

And if we need to talk it over with someone who understands, Emerald is usually available.

“Hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.” (Romans 8:24-25)

At last!

Waiting 9 months for the birth of a child doesn’t seem long in the early weeks, since growth can be carefully tracked on pregnancy web sites. We can see a baby’s size go from rice-like to kidney bean to grape to lime! Each week includes major developments as God does his marvelous work in “the secret place” of the womb. (Psalm 139)

But growth slows considerably toward the end of 9 months, and baby is usually “done” several weeks before delivery. That’s when it’s hard to wait patiently.

Katy and Hans have faithfully kept us posted on Baby #4’s progress, letting us know about several episodes of intense contractions that made us hopeful we’d meet this little one early. But the due date came and went, and as of yesterday Katy, along with the rest of us, was still waiting.

IMG_2674(1)

Then the clock ticked into today, and God said, “It’s time!”

Andrew Kenneth Nyman (7 lb 14 oz) greeted his parents at home, just after noon British time, with a full head of dark hair and a gentle smile. Thanks to iPhones, those of us 4000 miles away got to share the joy of the moment almost immediately. We “met” him while he was still wet behind the ears and watched as Andrew’s 3 older siblings greeted him for the first time, witnessing their tender kisses and expressions of amazement.

Four year old Nicholas, had repeatedly asked, “When is the baby coming?” Today, as he looked at his new little brother, all he could think to say was, “Is it real?” Finally able to see the long-invisible, eagerly-anticipated baby, these words were the best he could find to express the extraordinary wonder in his heart.

IMG_8265

The baby has been named well after his American cousin Andrew (and, as Hans added, the first of Jesus’ disciples). While growing up, Hans hung with a “set” of 4: Andrew-Klaus-Jo-Hans. These cousins, close in age, walked through childhood and adolescence together with Andrew in the lead, who today is an excellent example of a young man committed to Christ.

Little Andrew’s middle name comes to him from both sides of the family, Nate’s only sibling and Katy’s grandfather, both named Kenneth. But best of all are the meanings of these names: Andrew = manly, warrior; Kenneth = handsome, fiery. How wonderful to be a manly, handsome warrior with a fiery spirit!

As I talked with the Lord this morning, asking him to set Andrew’s heart on fire for Jesus, the verse he gave me (below) was God’s strong statement of commitment to Andrew Kenneth and a hope that he will be just as committed in return. This young life is already keenly important to all of us, but is even more so to the One who created him to be exactly as he is.IMG_1799 And we are so thankful!

ANDREW KENNETH NYMAN,

WELCOME TO THE FAMILY!

“I [the Lord] will make an everlasting covenant with [Andrew]: I will never stop doing good for [Andrew]. I will put a desire in [Andrew’s] heart to worship me, and [Andrew] will never leave me.” (Jeremiah 32:40)                   [personalization mine]