Category Archives: Children

But mine are best.

Posted on by

Many parents say they were blessed with the best kids in the world, my own mom included. But tonight it’s my kids’ turn.

Today was my birthday, but as Dad used to say on his own birthday, “What’s all the fuss about? Everyone has one of these every year.” Even so, I was feted to a dinner party, was given gifts, had a sleepover in downtown Chicago, ate lunch at a sidewalk café, and enjoyed the Broadway musical “Million Dollar Quartet,” watching it from a 2nd row seat. It was quite a birthday!

On top of all that, like cherries on the proverbial sundae, I heard from all 7 of my children, a gift of immeasurable value.

Back in 1973 when I was a new mother, if someone had asked, “What would ‘the best kids in the world’ look like?” my answer would have been something like this: those who obey every rule, get straights A’s in school, and sit quietly in church.

But when Nate’s and my parenting didn’t produce 7 children exactly like that, it didn’t bother us. That’s because we ended up with 7 deeply meaningful relationships with our now-adult children.

Every parent wants to see his/her children turn out to be “the best in the world.” So how do we get them there? What bottom-line do we want for them? Those of us who are Christians hope each of them will one day land in heaven, because that’s where we plan to be, and we want to be there together. Second to that, though, what’s our strongest desire for them?

“The best” kids will have probably developed good character. For example, all of us are thrilled when we see our children sticking with commitments they’ve made or working hard without complaint. We’re all pleased when they make decisions with wisdom or exercise self-control. And it’s gratifying to watch them put the needs of others ahead of their own.

As I thought about these important character qualities in relation to my children, I smiled to realize each of them have evidenced some of all of those… today. And then I thought of holding myself to the same high standard and recognized that it’s a lifelong project, for me and also for them. None of us will ever have flawless character, but we can all work steadily toward it.

God watches our efforts from the vantage point of character perfection. And I like to think that just as I got excited today when my children demonstrated some of those good qualities in caring for their mom, the Lord must be enthused when he sees a glimmer of that same character development in me.

But I’ll work on all that tomorrow. Today was a day to marvel at my children, but of course that stands to reason, because they’re the “best kids in the world!”

“Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:15)

Wall Art

Posted on by

Years ago a good friend was walking through our Illinois home after we’d completed some renovations and said, “Everything looks good, but the only art on your walls is pictures of your kids.”

I had to admit we’d probably overdone that. Every child was represented in every room, including bathrooms. I responded to him with humor, saying our children were our artwork, and Nate chimed in with a statement about how big the price tag was for such art.

But when we moved to Michigan, there were fewer rooms to decorate and far fewer walls. So I thought I’d show some restraint by not nailing up our children all over the place, deciding instead to give the seven of them one framed wall-picture apiece. Choosing the pictures was easy.

Because there will be no more photos taken with Nate, those we do have with him are precious, maybe even qualifying now as works of art. So I decided the seven kids’ pictures would all be father-and-child. The result is hanging in the hallway at the top of our steep, narrow stairway with a quote from the Bible’s love chapter written above them:

“Now abideth faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love.” (1 Cor. 13:13)

Many times each day I walk past these seven hanging frames with their accompanying verses and sometimes stop to study them. I enjoy looking into Nate’s face and like the way he’s got his arms wrapped around each child in the pictures. It’s an effective way to re-appreciate everything he did for his family, and to be continuously thankful for him.

Linking it with a verse about love reminds me of Nate’s love for his children, which was unstoppable.  I hope none of them ever doubt that, since they know he would have done anything for them to make their lives better (and often did).

A piece of mental artwork my mind treasures is the love Nate demonstrated toward his children on the day he received his diagnosis of metastasized pancreatic cancer. As he and I drove home from the doctor’s appointment that day, his first priority was to personally tell each of his children of his illness, one-on-one.

This was no small task for a man who’d just been clobbered with a death sentence, but he did it. He had to press through his own emotional pain seven times on seven phone calls in order to be present with each one during that difficult moment when they received the bad news. He had his arms around them as best he could.

And that’s true love.

Maybe the key to the most valuable artwork for any wall is the combination of people-pictures and scriptural words. God’s one-on-one love for all people is unstoppable, and he wants to be present during every traumatic moment of our lives if we’ll let him, to wrap “the greatest of these” loving arms around us.

As for the walls in the heavenly home he’s preparing for those who love him? I’ll bet every wall will be covered with us.

“How amazing are your thoughts concerning me, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand.” (Psalm 139:17-18)

Hearing Voices

Posted on by

Our church loves children. They and all their extraneous noises are welcome in the services, and our pastors frequently espouse the value of their generation. To make our worship hour more palatable for youngsters, a big basket at the back of the sanctuary sits filled with small cloth bags of quiet toys: crayons, coloring paper, shoelace-thread, sewing cards. All of us want children to know they’re a high priority to us, and by association, a high priority to God.

Of course a nursery is available for parents who need a break from their babies, or for children whose fussiness would distract other worshipers.

Today as we worked our way through the order of service, childish voices/noises erupted here and there along with the singing, praying, and preaching. Generally, though, quietness reigned. During the Scripture reading we suddenly heard a muffled but shrill baby’s cry coming from the narthex at the back of the sanctuary, behind closed doors. Maybe only those of us who are mothers heard it, but it was definitely a baby crying, probably being walked around by a nursery worker trying to quiet her.

Like a shot, a 20-something man jumped from his aisle seat and rushed toward the back of the sanctuary and out the double doors. Without even looking, he’d recognized the cry of his own child through closed doors, from far away, and above the speaker’s voice. Impressive.

As the service continued, the baby-crying stopped… within seconds. Whatever it was, daddy had fixed it.

That church-time mini-drama tugged my thinking right out of church and into heaven, specifically to God and his hearing abilities. Watching that young father bolt from the sanctuary was a demonstration of what God continually does for us. He’s always listening for our cries. And though the earth is populated with 7 billion people, all of whom are capable of crying, he recognizes the individual voices of each of us whether we’re whimpering, sobbing, or wailing.

The baby who cried in the church narthex this morning wasn’t making any specific request: “I want Daddy!” or “I’m hungry!” or “I’m frightened!” It was just a cry. But never mind the reason. Her father jumped from his seat and hurried to her anyway.

God does the exact same thing. If we’re expressing a need, he comes to us quickly, but even if we don’t know what we need, he comes then, too. By his strong response to our troubles, he’s saying the same thing our responding daddy was saying this morning: you, child, are important to me, a top priority. I’ll do whatever it takes to help you when you need me.

How wonderful to let children know, from their earliest days, that they’re important to us and to the church, and more significantly, to God. And we oldsters need to remember, the same goes for us.

“Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry.” (Psalm 130:2)