Category Archives: Children

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While Linnea gets to know her 3rd child, this grandma is having fun with the 1st and 2nd. Yesterday, since rain eliminated playgrounds and neighborhood hikes, the 3 of us ventured out to the library. As we started our drive, I suggested we each name something we’d like to see during our morning together. “I hope I see a horse,” I said.

Skylar quickly chimed in. “I want to see a cow, brown and white.” She also spoke for Micah. “Micah wants to see a fire truck.”

“Big fire truck,” he added.

The gigantic library building captivated us from the time we pulled into the parking lot. Leave it to children to point out the important sights, like the traveling book-mobile. Driving up close to it, we took time to enjoy the painted books on its exterior and the real books visible through its windows. “Those are for children who don’t have cars and can’t drive here,” Skylar said. Not bad reasoning, for a 3 year old.

As we walked into the front entrance, a larger-than-life, brightly painted horse greeted us. “Look!” Skylar said. “Midgee, a horse!” And sure enough, it was.

The children’s section, dominating half of the ground floor, was packed with child-friendly computers, magnet boards, floor puzzles, puppets, books, and an encouraging staff. As we mouse-clicked on a screen to match up mommy and baby animals, suddenly we were looking at Skylar’s cow. Brown and white to boot.

Our 2 hours ran out before their interest did, and when I announced it was time to leave, both children resisted. Strong-willed Skylar seemed close to an outburst, and I wondered how I’d successfully get them to the car.

Just then the entire library went dark, a power outage from God. Skylar jumped up, grabbed my hand and said, “It’s dark! Let’s go!”

Taking young children on an outing that’s been arranged completely for their benefit can be either a dream or a nightmare. I wonder if God sometimes plans good things strictly for our benefit and is disappointed when our responses flip-flop. “Yes, Lord, you blessed us with a sunny day, but now it’s too hot.” Or, “Sure, you gave me a new job, but now I don’t like my boss.”

Receiving what we’re given without wanting to tweak it is a skill gained only through resolute practice. With little children, we sometimes have to take good gifts away from them for the sake of teaching. And God sometimes takes away our sunny day, a new job, or any other blessing we will only appreciate by losing it.

Skylar, Micah and I were grateful (for different reasons) to quickly exit the dark library. And once in the car, as I was clicking Micah’s seat belt, a red fire truck drove right past us, sirens blaring, horns honking, and God blessing us 100%.

“Big fire truck!” Micah added.

“We brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. If we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.” (1 Timothy 6:7-8)

Occupying Center Stage

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Family-friendly expert James Dobson says that when a new baby arrives, the youngsters already in the home have an interesting perspective. What they see and hear is the equivalent of daddy telling mommy, “Honey, I’ve got good news. I’m bringing home another wife to join our family. She’ll be just as important as you are, and I’ll love her just as much as I love you. She’ll be part of every family gathering and will sleep with us, too. We’ll have to treat her with extra kindness until she gets comfortable being here. You’ll just love her.”

Understanding this perspective, which is common in older siblings, gives us a clear picture of what’s just ahead for my daughter and son-in-law, who introduced a new baby one week ago. At the moment, everything is sunshine and light. Skylar, age 3, and Micah, 2, are still in a period of adjustment we used to call “the honeymoon stage” with the new baby still in the category of a new toy. “Can I hold the baby, Mommy?” is still being answered with, “Sure,” and cameras are still recording each episode. We’re praising their gentleness and finding it easy to continue the introductory  litany:

“What a sweet big sister you are, Skylar. You’ll be a wonderful teacher for Autumn. She can’t do this… that… or the other… and you can.”

“Baby has no teeth, Micah. Do you have teeth? Wow! You can chew strawberries and beans, but baby can’t. What a big boy you are!”

Linnea and Adam know all about what’s upcoming and how to handle it, but that doesn’t make it easy. I’ve been impressed with their parenting and know they’ll persist in not allowing children #1 and #2 to occupy center-stage the way they’ll both want to.

Scripture gives a good deal of parental advice on this very point, stressing the importance of not permitting children to rule the roost. But it isn’t just a problem with kids. We adults like to occupy center-stage once in a while too, wanting increased attention from a husband, a parent, a friend or even God. We hate to wait our turn and often have difficulty sharing. We especially struggle with this when God is the one insisting on it:

“Why can’t I have positive answers to my prayers and have them immediately? And why do I have to serve in this… that… or the other capacity once again? Why can’t someone else do it this time?”

But when we begin thinking like this, we start sliding backwards spiritually. Living the Christian life is all about surrendering. Our calendars, the hours of our days, our energy and, much to our dismay, center-stage. But just as Skylar and Micah have to adjust to baby Autumn, the rest of us have to adjust to God’s way of doing things, especially if we want peace in the family.

“Be transformed by the renewal of your mind.” (Romans 12:2a)

Great Growth

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Last week the midwife who helped deliver our little Autumn Faith on Monday returned for a follow-up visit to finalize the birth certificate and check on mommy and baby. Another thing she did was paint black ink all over Autumn’s tiny feet to imprint them on a certificate, allowing us to view her precious heel-to-toe soles in a new way.

As we marveled over her perfect feet, of course we credited God for the wonder of her unique print patterns, clearly evident in the ink. But when Skylar and Micah put their bare feet next to Autumn’s prints, the resulting picture could have been entitled, “Great Growth.” The progress made between birth and ages 2 and 3 was impressive. Autumn has her work cut out for her.

Pediatricians tell us a baby usually doubles its birth weight by 5 months and triples it by a year, by far the most dramatic growth in anyone’s life, even including a year when we might eat too much. Maybe that’s why eating is a baby’s favorite pastime. Such tremendous growth is a big job.

It’s interesting that God’s growth assignment for a newborn fits a baby’s abilities. Then as the years add up, he still expects growth, but in categories other than physically. A toddler’s biggest assignment is to learn speech and increase vocabulary. A preschooler has to conquer toilet training and begin understanding the social graces, including letting others go first.

Once we reach school, the more difficult growth begins, much of it in the school of hard knocks. Important growth takes place in the emotional realm as children learn to deflect criticism and handle verbal sparring. We grow best through the tough stuff we encounter, and the growth of our feet loses importance, except at the shoe store.

Then we hit full-blown adulthood, and slowly it dawns on us we’re falling short in being able to control life and even ourselves. We experience loss, heartbreak, and failure. And we learn we need help to grow.

God is ready and waiting, patiently standing by all the while as our little feet grow into walking ones, and much later as our childish nature grows into mature character. Little feet get bigger so we can become independent; but God grows our character greater so we can one day succeed not at being independent but at dependency, which doesn’t make sense unless we realize who he wants us to depend on. And of course it’s him.

Once we become dependent on him for every step we take with our big adult feet, life becomes richly satisfying. And it isn’t as if he doesn’t still have plans for our physical soles. He wants us to walk into the lives of others in an attempt to win other souls to dependency on him. And when we’ve grown into that, God lets us know our feet have become downright beautiful, even more attractive than the precious feet of a newborn baby.

“How beautiful… are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say… ‘Your God reigns!’ ” (Isaiah 52:7)