Category Archives: Children

Worth the Wait

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1990Scripture says children are a blessing (Psalm 127:5). I’ve always found that to be true and was excited, from about the age of 12, that one day I might have some of my own. When adulthood finally came, much to my delight, kids came, too, and as predicted, they brought blessings.

They also brought a big surprise — that the joys of being a parent continue even after children become adults.

In all my years of hands-on mothering, no one ever told me about this happy phenomenon. Nobody mentioned that receiving a heart-felt letter of love from a 30-something would trump even the charming artwork of a kindergartener. The loving touch of an adult child is, I believe, one of the parenting “rewards” the Bible promises.

When I was in the thick of full-time mothering with 7 youngsters at home, there were some days when I craved time away from these blessings. But not so with my adult kids.

7 plus 1.

(L. to R. Lars, Linnea, Klaus, Birgitta, me, Hans, Louisa, Nelson

Rather than the energy drain young children can be, time with adult children is more like a filling-up. It gives me great pleasure to sit back at family gatherings and listen to my brood talk together – whether it’s politics, theology, or just reminiscing. There’s something incredibly appealing about listening to and watching them.

And then there are the one-on-one moments when a depth of heart is shared in confidence. Little children are enchanting, and for many reasons I love being around them. But they don’t need friendship from their parents as much as guidance, protection, and teaching. Once they’ve grown up, however, children and their parents have the happy option to just be friends.

I especially enjoy when my adult kids find new ways to say “I love you.” For instance, late one night Louisa decided to make Swedish pancakes — long after I’d gone to bed.

Louisa's pancakeThe next morning, I came downstairs, opened the fridge, and found an “I love you” waiting for me – a pancake with my name on it. (She calls me Midge.) Despite being tired after a long day of work and errands, Louisa had thought kindly of her old mama, reaching out as a loving friend. Though the pancake was yummy, far more delicious was the connection she’d taken time to make.

As I gain in years, I know the relationships with my adult children will continue to be important. And another thing I’ve learned for sure: Children truly do bring blessing…. all the way along.

“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.” (Psalm 127:3)

A Few Words from Mary

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Today, September 24, marks two years since my sister Mary died. As is true for anyone who’s lost someone precious, I still experience strong frustration at not being able to talk to her. Having valued her opinions and ideas for 70 years, I feel a void because of her absence.

1973 setSince the early 70’s when we had our first babies, the topic we most talked about (for the next 45 years) was mothering. We shared the highs and – more importantly – the lows. We  hashed over problems, exchanged solutions, and recognized God’s ongoing partnership.

 

M.E.P.Thankfully, Mary left behind many of her opinions and ideas about mothering, and recently I found a sampling. During the years we worked together in the Moody Church nursery, our Nursery Committee put out a quarterly newsletter called the Crib Sheet.

Each issue began with an article called THE HIGH CHAIR written by our chairman — Mary. She shared what was important to her, and in the issue I just came across, she summarizes what she calls the “privilege” of motherhood. Re-reading it today was a satisfying way to remember and honor her:

Crib Sheet

Jesus said, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them!” (Luke 18:16)  Mary loved it when they came to her, too. Then one day Jesus asked Mary to come to him…. and she did.

A Thousand Words

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Getting marriedIts been 3 whirlwind weeks for the Nyman clan, and if my mom was still around, she’d have labeled it all “happy chaos.”

Louisa and Teddy’s wedding day arrived at last, after a 15-month engagement. The ceremony was joy-filled and rewarding as Pastor Nelson married them, and our entire family of 26 attended…. all except Nate, of course, who was deeply missed.

 

 

Nate...

 

But the wedding took place on his birthday (8/18/18), and he was honored during the ceremony and also at the reception – which helped.

In the 9 years since his death, life has expanded to include 14 new family members, none of whom ever met Nate. So we forge ahead, embracing these new relationships while still taking pleasure in the old.

My one wish for the time we had together (other than witnessing the wedding) was to have a family photo taken. Because our children live all over the globe, the Nyman gang hasn’t been in the same place at the same time for 4 years. So this, to me, was an opportunity not to be missed.

The wedding photographer was available the morning after, and even the bride and groom were willing to rise early on their first day as Mr. and Mrs. (They’d already postponed their honeymoon to “hang” with family.)

“And where,” said the photographer, “will this photo session be?”

Where else but the beach.

Back in May, I crafted an email to my 7 children and their spouses with my picture request…. hoping they weren’t rolling their eyes across cyberspace. But after reading of my longing, their responses were kind. Even enthusiastic.

“So,” I wrote, “we’ll get up early the morning after the wedding and meet at the beach — wearing T-shirts color-coded by family. I’ll provide the shirts and the brunch afterwards.”

Though some were skeptical about the shirt idea, they knew there was no fighting it. And as these colorful shirts began arriving in my mail, I tried to keep expectations realistic…. but prayed for good weather and 12 cooperative grandchildren.

God graciously gave me the desire of my heart, a picture with everyone present and sunshine as a backdrop. I’ll be forever grateful to Him, and to the family I love – including Nate, who took a chance on me 50 years ago, which resulted in this:

Nyman Family-8.

 

“The plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations.” (Psalm 33:11)