Newlywed Love (#62)

May 18, 1970

As the school calendar wound down, I was getting nervous about not having a firm plan for the fall. I hadn’t heard from the Danville Board of Ed after my interview and had no way of knowing if I’d be teaching or not.

ConcernedNate reminded me that patience was a virtue and suggested we talk about anything but that when we took our evening walk. Just before we left, we got a call from Mary and Bervin. She was breathless with excitement, and I wondered what might be happening. “Guess what!” she said. “Today I felt life!”

I didn’t know what she meant, but she continued. “The baby! I felt the baby move inside of me today!”

 

Ultrasound.I couldn’t believe it! Something about her statement made this new little person more real than ever, and I just couldn’t wait to hold him or her in my arms – the first new baby in our small family of six adults. It snatched my thoughts away from teaching and gave Nate and I something special to talk about as we walked around the neighborhood that evening.

Inevitably the topic morphed from Mary and Bervin’s baby to the possibility of one for us some day. It was no secret that I loved children, but Nate hadn’t had any experience with kids at all. When I told him he would make a wonderful father, he responded with doubt.

“Well,” he said, “at least we don’t have to decide that anytime soon.”

Loving babiesHe was right. Although I had wanted my own babies since I was a child myself (left), I also pictured myself as a stay-at-home mom. With Nate still in school and me supporting us for another year, that dream would have to wait — more virtuous patience.

As we walked along hand-in-hand I said, ”I just wish I knew if I would be able to have babies or not, if there was some way to tell ahead of time. Then I wouldn’t have to wonder.”

“My guess,” he said, “ is that we’ll have a houseful of kids and your dream will come true — just not yet.”

We fantasized about what our children might look like and what their names might be. Nate said, “I’ll be OK with any name, as long as it’s not named after me.”

“How come?”

“Because I’m named after my dad – nothing but confusion. He’s Willard Nelson Nyman, and I’m Willard Nathan Nyman. Everybody calls him Willard, and calls me Nathan. But when I was living at home, if someone called the house and asked for Willard, no one knew if it was for Dad or me. And when mail came for Willard N. Nyman… again, no one knew. Let’s avoid all of that.”

“That’s fine,” I said. “I know I’ll love our babies even if we name them A, B, C …. or X, Y, Z.”

And that night when we climbed into bed, I realized I hadn’t thought about my teaching predicament even once.

“Children are a gift of the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward.” (Psalm 127:3)

Newlywed Love (#49)

April 4, 1970

Once we flipped the wall calendar from March to April, summer seemed almost on top of us. Both of us needed to find summer jobs to help with tuition payments, and our savings badly needed a boost.

Logo

Nate’s work doing taxes for H & R Block had been a gift from God, paying well and allowing us to catch up a bit financially. But in less than two weeks that job would disappear, and we’d be back to living on my slim teaching salary — with nothing coming in all summer.

 

WaitressingSince I had several months of waitressing experience, I figured I could get a serving job without too much difficulty, and Nate said he was willing to do almost anything. He also hoped to take a couple of law classes over the summer to lighten his fall load, so he could continue working through his last semester of law school.

He was using every spare minute to write 3 long papers, one about 30 pages. I volunteered to type for him, but he was a good typer, too. Besides, he would have had to spell out all the legalese.

So, when my friend Connie called to say she wanted to come for the weekend with 3 of our former campers (from Moody Youth Camp) I said, “Yes!” ….promising Nate that the 5 of us would find entertainment away from the apartment so he could work in peace.

It was a treat spending time with Connie again and reconnecting with these energetic high school girls. Gail, Debbie, and Laurie were a lively trio that loved action, so we took them to Allerton Park for the day and ran around the 1500 acre estate until Connie and I were ready to drop.

Allerton SculptureRobert Allerton (son of Samuel Allerton) managed his family’s large property near Champaign while his father tended to businesses in Chicago. Robert’s true passion was art, with a special fondness for sculpture. He believed art could enhance nature…. and vice versa.

On the Allerton property, then, are his collected works throughout the manicured gardens and natural areas.

 

Allerton...Finding them all (over 100) on miles of trails can take several days. The girls had never seen anything quite like it.

They were also delighted to get inside the gorgeous mansion, astounded to see how “the other half” lives. And all of it was free.

 

Allerton Mansion.

Meanwhile, Nate plowed through the day pursuing his studies, and we shared the dinner hour with him before Connie left with the girls, promising to bring them back for church in the morning. We would share lunch afterwards, then wave them off to Chicago.

That evening Nate went back to his typewriter after the meal, telling me he’d have to labor well into the night. My heart went out to him, and it didn’t seem fair that my life was so easy compared to his. But the end was in sight: summer school, then the fall semester, and in January of 1971, graduation!

I was extremely proud of my man and his gritty diligence. So, before I went to bed by myself that night, I told him so.

“The wife must see to it that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:33)

Newlywed Love (#48)

March 30, 1970

As the Easter break came to a close, Nate and I headed back to our schools feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the last weeks of the academic year. The only negative was knowing it was time for me to talk to Principal Scarce about changing my classroom assignment for the fall.

PortraitI badly wanted to go back to teaching kindergarten and knew it would upset him if I left his 1st grade empty. That was because both Judy and Linda planned to leave McKinley, too. Judy’s husband was about to get his grad degree, and they would be headed to his first job in New York City. Linda had found a teaching job closer to Champaign. That meant nearly half of Mr. Scarce’s classrooms would need new hires.

I decided to bite the bullet and head for Mr. Scarce’s office first thing Monday morning. As anticipated, when I gave him the news he wasn’t happy. “Well….,” he said, “my kindergarten teacher isn’t going anywhere, so you’re out of luck.”

I told him I knew that and had planned to look at other schools. “I don’t know of any kindergarten openings,” he said, “and Danville has only a handful of elementary schools.”

Despite his discouragement, I had to try.

God must have agreed with me that I was better at teaching kindergarteners than 1st graders, because when I called the Board of Ed, one kindergarten slot had just opened. I made an appointment to interview several days later and hoped no one else would get there ahead of me.

Although my sweet 1st grade kids and I were making it through the year, it wasn’t without stress.Kindergarten classroom

Teaching kindergarteners didn’t even seem like work. Maybe it was the joy of shepherding them through their first school experience or the time available to sing, dance, and play together.

Maybe it was the absence of educational testing. Or maybe I just loved their cuteness. One thing I knew was that I’d rather read to children than teach them to read.

Back at the apartment that evening, I brought Nate up to date. As we talked, it was evident the heaviness of law school had settled back over him. Rather than feeling bad about that, though, I was thrilled to be the wife who was privileged to relieve his stress.

PoetryAs he studied, I got busy baking a batch of sugar cookies, his favorite, frosting them in different colors. Then, after making a pot of coffee, I coaxed him into a study break. As he munched, I presented him with a simple “poem” I’d written for him.

 

 

 

 

Schmooch.After that, I enticed him onto the couch where I learned that a quick sexual romp can be a better stress reliever than even a whole batch of frosted sugar cookies.

“True to your word, [Father], you let me catch my breath and sent me in the right direction.” (Psalm 23:3, The Message)