Staying Upright

Little AndrewEmerald, my 7th-of-9 grandchildren, will be a one-year-old for only another month or so. Her cousin Andrew from England (#8) will be one for 8 more months. In the general scheme of things, both are relatively new walkers, and watching them get around is comedic entertainment.

A walk around the block is an athletic event for a new walker, and both Emerald and Andrew still lead with their tummies, shoulders back, arms out to the side for balance. It’s a charming, brief stage of life.

photo(1)When a baby is learning to walk, he falls down continually, though he eventually develops a toddle and falls less often. Still, it doesn’t take much to throw him to the ground. But for all one-year-olds, popping up without damage is the usual outcome of a fall.

A school child who falls doesn’t pop up as readily. Tears flow, and there might be a need for a cartoon-enhanced Band-Aid. But he, too, heals quickly and forgets his tumble in a hurry.

By the time we’re adults, falls are nearly non-existent. We’ve become good on our feet and sure of our step. If we do go down, it’s quite a crash, and before we get up, we pause to see if we’re hurt. Often it’s 24 hours later that we “see” what we really did through stiff muscles and fresh bruises.

The other day I took a fall of my own after tripping over a lamp cord. No harm was done, and I was glad no one saw me, but it made me decide I didn’t want to fall again. A broken bone, common at my age, would be less than convenient, and I’m making an effort to walk carefully, not carelessly.

If we live long enough, however, none of us will be walking. Old folk’s homes make good use of wheelchairs, and as the Bible says, aged people are sometimes taken places they don’t want to go. That’s because they can’t walk in the other direction.

When that time comes, our walking will have to be done in another realm, the realm of faith. Scripture tells us it’s best to walk by faith in God rather than by sight. The verse implies we ought to be faith-walking throughout life, not just in old age, depending on God’s guidance rather than on what we see.

When we’re able-bodied, walking through life without many physical falls, it’s easier to fall spiritually and not know it. But when we’re in a bed or wheelchair, faith-walking comes more readily. Maybe that’s the best kept secret of old age.

Andrew at oneEmerald at oneMeanwhile, I’m seeing two little one-year-olds walking with enthusiasm and managing life completely by sight, not by faith. But that’s ok for now, because once in a while they walk right into the arms of a grateful grandma.

“We walk by faith, not by sight.” (2 Corinthians 5:7)

Praying and Praising with Mary

  1. I’m praising the Lord that medical personnel found a good vein during Monday’s infusion.
  2. I’m also thankful I have only 3 infusions left (out of 18 total).

Making a Good Impression

Wet CementBookstore shelves are loaded with parenting titles, but the one I like best is a 1979 book by Anne Ortlund: CHILDREN ARE WET CEMENT. It’s a powerful statement with accurate parenting implications.

When workers poured the concrete for our patio 28 years ago, our five children each pressed their palms into the wet cement, along with a quarter from their birth years. I pressed in a penny dated that year, 1986, next to the line-up of hands, to mark the date those childhood palms were set. As soft as the concrete was when we touched it, shortly thereafter it became rock-hard and has been that way ever since. Without the use of a jack-hammer, the hand impressions are permanent.

As children arrive into our families, they’re soft and impressionable, “wet” with potential. Parenting them is the most important assignment we’ll ever get, a serious responsibility given to us by the Person who created every baby and has specific plans for each life. The way we live in front of them leaves a permanent mark.

While spending time with my grandchildren this week, I’ve seen again how supple the mind of a child really is. Children spend the lion’s share of their waking hours imitating the rest of us. If we open a kitchen drawer, as soon as we close it, a watching child opens it again, following our example.

Little ones don’t need a reason to imitate us. They do it instinctively. We own the power to be examples for good or evil, an enormous responsibility that should cause us to keep our lives clean as we go along.

Modeling well in front of one and two year olds is easy. In front of teenagers it’s more difficult.

InfluencingBut we do our best, because we want to give our children the strongest possible springboard into adulthood. Despite multiple failures and a list of if-only’s, we keep trying. Knowing we’re being carefully watched is a strong motivator!

As a child of God, I wonder if I’m carefully watching Jesus in the same way. Do I study his life and try to emulate him? Or do I dismiss that possibility, knowing I could never match him? Jesus instructed us to watch what he did, then copy it. Do I?

Of course I’m going to fall short, just as children fail to duplicate adult behavior. But that doesn’t keep them from trying, and the same should be true for me. Although I’ll never be able to exude the fruit of the Spirit as flawlessly as Jesus did, with practice I can improve.

Watching my grandchildren try, fail, and keep trying encourages me to do the same.

“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” (John 13:14-15)

Up to Down to Up

A while ago several of my kids and I got a kick out of watching the comedian Jerry Seinfeld on DVD. One of his bits has stuck with me, a clever commentary on children and their parents:

When you’re little, your life is up. The future is up. Everything you want is up.

“Wait up! Hold up! Shut up! Mom, I’ll clean up! Just let me stay…up!”

 Parents, of course, are just the opposite. Everything is down.

“Calm down. Slow down. Come down here. Sit down. Put that… down!”

In another week, all 9 of my grandchildren will be at my house. I’ve been working to baby-proof the rooms, removing breakables and swallowable objects as I go. No matter how I try, though, their parents will find all sorts of interesting things in those youthful mouths.

Toddlers and pre-schoolers are experts at reaching the things we adults think have been put… up. Not even the kitchen counters are safe once they figure out the stools. And so we do what level-headed adults do: we put stuff up higher.

Car keys, cell phones, ipods, DVDs, candles, phone chargers and other valuables will end up heaped in places we can barely reach. To us it’ll be a slight inconvenience. To the children it’ll be frustration. Their days will be spent looking… up, and scheming to bring stuff… down.

The problem comes in having cross purposes. Our little people judge themselves capable of handling adult-only items, while we know their touch brings death to valuables. Interestingly, when we provide substitutes, (toy phones or blank keys), they quickly learn the ploy and toss them aside.

Little children are to us what we are to God. When we look to him, it’s always “up.” He’s higher than we are in all categories, and his decisions to keep certain things out of our reach are for our good. Just as kids can’t understand why they can’t have our breakables, we get frustrated when God doesn’t give us what we want, too.

Children whine and reach endlessly for whatever is too high for them, but I ought never to whine at God. His “up’s” should be allowed to stay there without me complaining about it. When I’m wanting what he doesn’t want me to have, I’m missing what has already come… down… and is available to me: Jesus himself. 

Someday, after a new heaven and earth come… down, even  frustrated toddlers will finally be able to reach everything that used to be… up.

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming… down… from the Father of the heavenly lights.” (James 1:17)

Praising and Praying with Mary

  1. I’m thankful for a family-filled holiday weekend and for feeling good after 2 weeks away from chemo.
  2. Please pray I’ll have an improved attitude about going back to chemo. Once I’m feeling good, it’s very hard to head back into it.