Waiting Patiently?

Posted on November 3, 2013 by Margaret

One of my favorite family photos is this one of Klaus and Hans, our children #4 and #5. We were on a family trip to Florida in 1985 when these two little guys, ages 3 and 4, were demonstrating patience. They were waiting for the perfect wave to lift their mini- surfboards off the sand and take them on a smooth, danger-free ride atop the ocean. They’d done everything they knew to do and were waiting for the water to do what they could not.

It’s a perfect picture of faith. We wait; God acts.

Today is the 4^th anniversary of Nate’s death. Although I don’t know if he’s marking time the way we are, sometimes I get impatient to find out. Whether he’s looking forward to our reunion or not, there are days I long for it with everything in me, just like the boys longed to ride an ocean wave. It’s not that I have a death wish; life holds many good reasons to go on living. I’d just like to be with him again.

My children don’t like it when I talk about joining their father, but my desire isn’t to leave them. It’s that we all leave. In other words, my longing is for Jesus to come and scoop us up for an exit from this world and an entrance into the next. And it’s difficult to be patient.

No matter how hard any of us wishes for that day, however, we can’t hurry it along any more than a gardener can force a seedling to sprout. These things are up to God.

Today a handful of my children and I talked about their father at lunchtime. Their spoken memories of him were like gifts to me, and we shared our feelings about this anniversary day. Talking about how difficult it was to be in Nate’s presence when he died didn’t make us regret being there. It was deeply meaningful to experience those holy moments as a family, expressing love to the one who was dying as well as to each other.

My Spurgeon daily devotional book has a simple note written on this day, November 3^rd. It says, “Nate died today,” a bare-bones statement of fact. Maybe I should have written, “Nate went to heaven today,” or something more positive. But when he died, my heart was so swamped with loss, those were the only words I could come up with.

That November 3^rd devotional happens to be about waiting for God’s timing. Spurgeon wrote, “We are in a hurry, but God’s time is the best time.” The last paragraph is a note to himself: ”Come, my soul, canst thou not wait for thy God? Rest in him, and be still in unutterable peacefulness.”

My little boys waited peacefully at the shoreline, hoping for the best, and since I can’t do anything to hasten my reunion with Nate, I can only do the same.

“Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act.” (Psalm 37:7)

A Proud Day

Posted on October 31, 2013 by Margaret

The Disney cartoon “Dumbo” about a baby elephant is actually a story of mother-love. When Mrs. Jumbo receives a stork-delivered bundle, the elephant matrons admire little Jumbo Junior saying, “This is a proud, proud day!”

The plot line goes downhill from there as they discover the little guy has massive, flag-like ears, which is when the older elephants nickname him Dumbo. But his mother continues in passionate love for her offspring, and every day is a proud, proud day for her. When Dumbo figures out how to use his oversized ears to fly, his mother is nearly bursting with pride.

Children bring big bundles of happiness to their parents, and when they accomplish something wonderful or make an excellent decision, we parents get a thrill just watching from the sidelines.

It was a “proud, proud day” for me this week because of something my daughter Birgitta did. She was officially sworn in with 10 others in a courtroom ceremony, all of whom have been through 6 weeks of intensive training. Their preparation has been done through the local C.A.S.A. program, which stands for Court Appointed Special Advocate.

Beginning next week, these 11 volunteers will walk alongside one child in the foster care system, becoming a friend and a familiar face through the different stages of that youngster’s time away from his or her parents. This might mean visits to the home, testimony to a judge concerning the child’s welfare, interviews of relevant parties, courtroom observations, time spent paired with a social worker, and other moments when they’ll partner with “their” child.

None of it will be easy, because each “case” is a sad one, and some involve the physical suffering of children. Trying not to get overwhelmed with the enormity of the needs will be part of the challenge for each C.A.S.A. volunteer, and several of them dropped out of the program even before the training period was over.

Families were invited to witness the swearing-in ceremony this week, after which a celebration was hosted by their teacher. And as I listened to two judges challenge the new Special Advocates and thank them for their willingness to serve, it was a proud, proud day.

Today Birgitta was assigned her first case. Of course she’s nervous, wanting badly to do a good job, despite never having done anything like this before. But Scripture says, “God blesses those who work for peace.” (Matthew 5:9) I admire her greatly in her willingness to step out and do something that will be very difficult. She doesn’t have to do it but simply wants to…. with a passion.

It defies logic, and for that reason, I know it is God who has called her to “fly” into this task, and my prayer for her is:

“May the God of peace…. equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, every good thing that is pleasing to him.” (Hebrews 13:20)

Trying Hard

Posted on October 30, 2013 by Margaret

Earlier this week our late-October weather was perfect. With blue skies and light breezes, it was the day we’d been waiting for to have an evening beach fire where the children could gobble down s’mores, enjoy a sunset, and get tired out before bedtime.

By 6:00 pm the winds had picked up and Lake Michigan was working up a good chop, but we did as planned and had a great time. Emerald, still battling a bad cold, was wrapped snugly, content to sit in Louisa’s lap sucking on a pacifier. (Mama Birgitta was attending her university classes.)

As the 3 children raced across the sand toward the ice-cold water, Adam’s one caution was short and clear: “Don’t get your feet wet!”

But when the sun started to drop toward the horizon, so did the temperatures. That’s when the little ones began to feel the full effect of romping too close to disobedience as their wet feet stung with the cold.

By the time we got home, toes were bright red and throbbing. Maybe a lesson in obedience was learned, but it’s probable they’ll have to relearn it again and again.

Skylar, Micah, and Autumn aren’t the only ones with a bent toward doing their own thing rather than heeding the warnings of an authority figure. All of us are in that camp. As adults, when we arrive at the painful consequences of our own poor decisions, we usually feel badly about them and accept blame for the cost of our disobedience. But when we end up waging the same battle again and again, we get downright disgusted with ourselves.

“Wouldn’t it be nice,” we say, “if we didn’t have this natural bent toward insisting on our own way? Life would be so much easier if we’d just do things right the first time.”

Happily, that day will come. Our sinful natures will be history, which is good news for those of us in a continual struggle to hold selfish pride at bay. It’s interesting that the more diligence we demonstrate as we work to tame our wills this side of eternity, the greater God’s approval in the here-and-now. And when he approves, he rewards…. with an increased capacity to fight our self-wills more effectively.

Despite that help for today, though, I’m really looking forward to God’s tomorrow when we’ll no longer have to battle ourselves. Our sin nature will have completely disappeared, and obeying our Supreme Authority will be pure pleasure.

At long last we’ll know what we ought to do and will actually delight in doing it. And that goes for Skylar, Micah, Autumn, and their wet feet, too.