Newlywed Love (#10)

December 19, 1969

Once Nate and I settled the issue of who would buy the Christmas tree each year, we began enjoying our first holiday season together. Though Christmas Eve and Day would be spent with our parents and other relatives, the remaining days of December were just for us.

First ornamentMy sweet Aunt Joyce, an expert seamstress, had made me a casual evening gown of glittering lavender, “….for the times,” she said, “when it’s just you and Nate.” It was low cut and what she called “fetching,” a look Nate would love.

So when it finally came time to decorate our tree, I told Nate I had something special to show him first. When I came into the living room with my sparkly, floor-length outfit on, I learned what Aunt Joyce meant by “fetching.” Without a word, it fetched him right over to me!

Our decorating didn’t take very long. We’d gone to the local mall and each chosen one ornament as the start of a Nyman family tradition, so we did have those. And we had one string of lights for our giant tree, but that was all.

Nate's ornamentHowever, with great joy and lots of ceremony, we took turns hanging our two ornaments. Nate had picked a plastic one that resembled a stoplight with “jewels” on all four sides. I chose a delicate glass globe with a glitzy gold star inside.

And our multi-colored lights were a snap to put on, although we did it upside-down, ending with the plug at the top. It made for a good laugh and was no problem to re-hang them, since it was only one string.

Turning out the room lights and sitting on the floor beneath our tree was a moment of magic that would last a long time. Later I wrote in my journal:

Since we’ve been married for almost a month, the strong feeling I hold for Nate has increased ten-fold. It’s really a strong, secure bond of love. It seems that all the things we do for each other never go unreciprocated. Pleasing him pleases me.

Dec. journal

The next day we received some news that was even better than a Christmas gift. My Wheaton roommate Julie, the one who was going to “let us store” her grandma’s elegant bedroom set, called to say the furniture would be leaving Wisconsin on a moving truck the very next day.

After living with what we called a bare-naked bedroom for 4 months, at last we would have dresser drawers for putting away our clothes, mirrors to get ready in front of, and best of all, a real bed to sleep in…. with room in it to do lots of other things, too.

We couldn’t wait!

“Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.” (Romans 12:10)

Young Love (#8)

Life bounced along at a happy pace through Christmas, as I enjoyed the attentions of one long-distance guy and another up-close one. Both relationships were moving forward, and I didn’t see any potential conflict. I even entertained thoughts of what it might be like to be married to one or the other, but didn’t try to choose.

It had been a year since I’d seen Nate, and as Dec. 27 approached, I grew more and more excited…

…until an unexpected phone call knocked me for a loop.

getting-readyIt was Dec. 26, the day before Nate was to arrive, and when I picked up the phone, my heart stopped. It was my old boyfriend. Though it had been 9 weeks since our traumatic break-up, when I heard his voice, I melted. He asked if I might want to get together that evening, just as “friends,” and in a swirl of confused but lovely feelings, I said yes.

Since there are no letters written about that night, I’ll quote from my journal:

Dec. 26, 1968 – We went out to dinner at our favorite restaurant, and it was just like old times – beautiful. Since we were now “good friends,” he was eager to tell me about his new girlfriend. As he confided in me, I had all I could do to keep my jealous feelings in check. I had to silently pray for constant support.

He told me they were making plans to move in together. Though I knew I shouldn’t have been wounded by that news (after all, we were broken up), it absolutely crushed me.

But after he was done mentioning “her,” I enjoyed every minute, relishing the time with him. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. He told me he’d have to leave my house by 1:00 AM that night, but at 3:30 we were still talking. When we finally hugged goodbye, it felt good to be wrapped in his arms again. He told me he still “liked me a lot” and hoped we could have many more get-togethers. He left close to 4:00 AM.

I don’t feel much like seeing Nate tomorrow. I’ll have to really work at it. I’ve just got to get a positive attitude before then, or it’ll flop badly.

broken-heartDec. 27, 1968 – Nate comes today, but this morning all I can think about is (my old boyfriend). But I figured out that his new girlfriend is the one factor preventing me from going back to him and laying my heart at his feet, which would be an utter fatality. So, I see that she is the Lord’s answer to my prayers, His preventive medicine for me, and I absolutely must swallow it. It’s agony! But it’s 100% effective…

“This is the confidence that we have toward Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of Him.” (1 John 5:14-15)

Young Love (#7)

The count-down was on for a visit from Nate after Christmas. My non-dating, long-distance relationship with him became convoluted, though, when another suitor, this one from my church, began including me in his weekend rallies with Campus Crusade. He was spiritually deep, and I enjoyed getting to know him without the slightest twinge of guilt about Nate. After all, neither he nor I had made a commitment to each other, though it was obvious he wanted one. This friend and I began sitting in church together and taking long walks along Chicago’s lakefront. But I thought it best not to mention it in my letters to Nate.

lotsa-lettersDec. 13, 1968 – Dear Nate. Here’s a question for you: did you used to call me “Meg” in words or just in writing? I forgot. (Actually, writing is words, I know, but you know what I mean.)

Dec. 16, 1968 – I called you “Meg” in my letters and in person. Can you tell that it’s pretty obvious I would like to make a go of it with you? I could drive up from Champaign more often if we had a more serious relationship. Being alone with you sounds good. Actually double good.

Dec. 19, 1968 – Nate, thank you for your nice letter. I read it 4 times, smiling through all 4 readings. (And now I’ll bet you’re wondering what you wrote!) It was very complimentary. But maybe it was just my mood. By the way, are you Swedish? I told my family you are coming after Christmas, and they began discussing your name, Nyman. Dad held to his opinion that it was Swedish. I didn’t think so, but added that you do have blond hair.

coffeeDec. 22, 1968 – Dear Meg. Yes, I am of Swedish descent. My great-grandfather, Peter Swan Nyman, came from Southern Sweden to the U.S. in the 1860’s. He was a clockmaker. Granny has an old picture of him; he has a mustache that looks like the Kaiser’s. She also has a huge Swedish Bible published in 1762, which he brought with him from Sweden. You spoke of my blond hair as a Swedish trait. Here’s another…. I like coffee.

Dec. 22, 1968 – Dear Nate. I don’t owe you a letter yet, but I’m writing anyway. I want to tell you something. Tonight after church we had a party for about 35 kids, ages 19-25. They stayed until 1:30 AM, and I was co-hostess. I was kept busy serving food, instructing in games, pouring coffee, but at one point had a quiet moment to observe everyone having a good time. And before I knew it, my thoughts were with you. I wished you were among the guests, because I wanted to talk to you. That’s all.

Dec. 23, 1968 – When I returned from Army Drill, exhausted and cold, I found your note in the mailbox. It warmed me! You’re the best little Svenska flicka! Many times I’ve thought how much I’d like to have you down here as a student so we could see each other often. A very close and natural relationship would develop.

God’s wisdom… “gives knowledge and discretion to the young.” (Proverbs 1:4)