Yesterday we got a glimpse into what Mary is thinking these days. In one sense, she’s waiting. Most of us bristle at having to wait for almost anything, but waiting for deadly cancer to show itself is possibly the worst wait there is.
Yet through these uncertain days, Mary’s faith has remained certain. Today she describes her lowest cancer-related moment and what she did to get past it:
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Practically every Christian has memorized Romans 8:28: “All things work together for good to them that love God.” But life offers up all kinds of “things” that can’t possibly result in anything good. At least that’s our perspective going through them. But God’s Word is true no matter what we think.
All of us experience dark days when it seems life can’t get any worse. My most recent experience with that occurred on the day I learned I had pancreatic cancer.
My lowest point came when I realized I had to call each of our 7 children with the bad news. As they wept and agonized over my dim prognosis, I wept, too. What mother wants to call their children and strike them with pain like that? What mother wants to make her grown children cry?
Though I knew in my head that having cancer wasn’t my fault or my choice, at that low moment it felt like I was responsible for the pain my children were feeling. And since they weren’t coping well, neither was I. It was one of the darkest days of my life.
But God comes close to the brokenhearted. In the middle of nearly unbearable pain, he puts his arms around us by way of Scripture and offers practical help, personalized to our needs. When I was suffering most, I heard God’s whisper into my soul: “All things will work together for good. Even this.”
I couldn’t see it then or even for days afterwards, but now, at the one year point, I can see how he kept his promise. Here’s some of it:
Family, friends, and even strangers began lifting my name and my family’s names to the Lord for his immediate help. Many promised to pray for me not just once but every day! Others sent cards, emails, Bible verses, encouraging words of all kinds… by the hundreds! A year later, it hasn’t stopped.
But there’s more. My children came and are still coming from far and wide, again and again, supporting their parents and also each other. My grandchildren have spoken tender words of love to me. And we’ve all gained a broader perspective on eternity, connecting it in new ways to life on earth.
I’ve received visitors bringing gifts, food, and especially a desire to pray over me, calling out for strength and encouragement, which then traveled from God through them and into me.
God has blessed me with more good days than bad this year, and several days were downright spectacular! I got to welcome two new grandbabies and see a daughter get married. It was an important year full of family joy.
Best of all, though, my terminal diagnosis drove me to God and his Word like never before. I’ve leaned on him harder than at any other time in my life and have soaked my brain in Scripture. He taught me how to take full advantage of his promises and gave me a golden opportunity to testify to others that the supernatural peace the Bible promises is available even in the middle of terminal cancer.
And all of this is God “working things together for good.”
[ Tomorrow Mary will share how she resists the enemy’s desire to make her fearful. ]
“I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear; but now my eye sees You.” (Job 42:5)
The changes I’m talking about aren’t physical, though at 87 years old, I’m definitely slowing down. My problem is that I’m changing on the inside, especially in my head. Midge tells me I’m acting different these days, and that makes sense, since I feel different.