Category Archives: Disease

New Hair

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???????????????????????????????Back in the 1960’s, I bought myself some fake hair. Junior year in college was an especially busy time, and the long “falls” that were popular then (think ponytails) moved hairdos away from high-maintenance curlers to insta-ready coiffures.

The “tails” could be worn long or curled around the top of the head for up-do’s. Many a morning I washed just my bangs, added the fake hair and went from wake-up alarm to classroom in 10 minutes flat.

???????????????????????????????As a newlywed I expanded my hair inventory with a pixie-style wig, a tight, cap-like affair that shortened my prep time even further.

Wigs can be a time-saving tool or, as in Mary’s case, a weapon against letting cancer dominate. Veterans of cancer are familiar with the radical ups and downs of treatment, its physical symptoms and its emotions. Mary has sampled some of that this week, feeling hopeless on Monday but hopeful on Tuesday.

Monday afternoon, in the middle of that deep low, she and Bervin walked into a wig shop near Mayo Clinic.  It’s a place that doesn’t  just sell wigs. The staff there provides gentle expertise and conversational comfort to each customer, well aware that none of them want to be there.

Though Mary had planned ahead of time to shop that afternoon, Monday wasn’t the right day for it. As she put it, “I couldn’t even look at the wigs without crying. The whole thing overwhelmed me, and we had to leave.”

Getting startedTuesday, however, was a different story. After the medical encouragement they’d received at the clinic, Mary wrote about “Wig Shopping, Part II.” “I praise the Lord I was able to put on a skullcap today and try on wigs. As I sat in the styling chair and listened to the Christian music playing, I was reminded of God’s presence being everywhere, even in a wig shop!”

We Christians don’t doubt God’s statement that he will always be with us. He said he’d never leave us, and we believe him. But after a down-day like Mary’s Monday, he knows we need a fresh reminder. And he brought it to Mary in the form of worship music just as she was muscling through a new and unwelcome experience. Our Creator has all kinds of ways to let us know he’s close at hand, and his timing is always spectacular.

Bervin's choiceMary and Bervin walked out of the wig shop with “new hair” for Mary, should she need it during her chemo. She said, “I let Bervin pick it out, and it’s pretty fluffy. I’ll definitely have ‘big hair’!”

The Lord said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” (Exodus 33:14)

 

 

Mary’s Prayer Requests

  1. For wisdom to know which Chicago hospital to use for chemo
  2. For improvement in food absorption that will lead to weight gain
  3. Praise for a good blood test result today, indicating no metastasis
  4. Praise for safe travel back and forth to Minnesota

Making Plans

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Checking the listMary has always been well organized. She’s on top of her calendar, and despite having her “fingers in a lot of pies” (as they say), she’s never made a sticky mess of any of them. Her lists are drawn up well in advance, and she enjoys checking them off. She creates practical plans and isn’t forgetful, never the type to say, “I forgot what I came in this room to get.”

That’s why her cancer journey has been so frustrating. She can’t plan. She had no warning that yesterday would be the draining day it was, which made its impact all the greater. But she also didn’t know how much brighter today would be.

The nationally famous, very busy Dr. Truty was part of this day at Mayo’s, meeting with Mary and Bervin for a post-op analysis and progress report. All the news was good, and he declared her Whipple surgery a complete success. She is healing well, and the feeding tube, no longer an irritant, is doing its job.

IMG_3581But Dr. Truty didn’t stop there. To quote Mary’s text: “He really helped us put things in perspective. He agreed that pancreatic cancer is aggressive, but said from everything he’s seen so far, we shouldn’t look at it as hopeless.”

And it was as if a window opened and spring breezes blew winter’s darkness right out. As for Mary’s decision about whether or not to choose chemotherapy, the doctor helped with that, too. She wrote, “He thinks with chemo I can look forward to good days and probably years. He’s a positive guy for sure!”

So she has decided chemo is in her near future and has committed to the doctor’s aggressive treatment program. She also said that since she won’t have to start for another week or so, she’ll get to celebrate Easter while still feeling pretty good. She said, “The Lord knew I needed that. It’s a gift, and an answer to prayer.”

After Easter, Mary and Bervin will put her list-making to valuable use as they meet with oncologists at three Chicago hospitals. They’ll get to choose where she’ll receive her treatments over the next 6 months, and Dr. Truty made some practical recommendations, persuading them it was ok to transfer their medical trust to a facility other than Mayo Clinic.

When Mary and Bervin set out for Rochester this last weekend, Mary had one of her lists with her, this one with four “to-do’s” on it: (1) meet with the oncologists, (2) meet with Dr. Truty, (3) decide yes or no on chemo, and (4) depending on her decision, maybe buy a wig. As they drove back to Chicago today, she had the satisfaction of checking off all four.

And tomorrow we’ll hear the up-and-down story of what it was like to shop for new hair.

“The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance.” (Proverbs 21:5)

Mary’s Prayer Requests

  1. Pray for God’s choice of a Chicago hospital/doctor to administer chemo
  2. Pray that both Bervin and Mary will keep their eyes off pancreatic cancer and on Jesus
  3. Praise for being able to get a wig today

A Journey, Good and Bad

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MapToday Mary and Bervin traveled back to Minnesota for several important appointments at the Mayo Clinic, a journey that came with good news and bad news. The good news will be when Mary’s doctor tells her his Whipple surgery is healing perfectly, right on schedule. The bad news will come as they meet Mary’s oncologist, a “chemo man.” He’ll detail Mary’s “phase 2” treatment plan for the next few months and may even want to kick-start it this week.

Mary is resigned to the necessity of chemotherapy but of course is dreading it. We’ve all heard too many war stories not to feel that way along with her. After tomorrow’s meeting she’ll know more of the details, but tonight she feels like she’s stepping onto a long, winding road.  Despite not knowing what pitfalls lie ahead, however, she has committed to go the distance.

Airdate: Sunday, November 12 (9-11 p.m. ET)Today as I thought about Mary beginning this extended journey, God brought another journeyman to mind: Abraham of the Bible. In that different day and time, his experience had several things in common with Mary’s. For one thing, he was told to set out without being given the specifics of his route or what was going to happen to him along the way, just like Mary. He knew some of it would be painful and surely wondered how bad it might get.

Even more significant than Abraham’s journey, though, was that of Jesus. From the moment of his birth, he began journeying toward the cross. Though he was God incarnate, as fully-man he probably didn’t know exactly what the route would look like or what his specific setbacks would be. And surely he must have experienced dread.

Palm Sunday's paradeEven as he made his way from the hills outside Jerusalem into the city on what we now call Palm Sunday, he knew that the devotees waving branches and singing allegiance to him would turn on him just a few days hence. Yet he didn’t step back from his journey. One pace after another, he saw it through.

All of that sounds like bad news, but there is some really good news for those on a God-prescribed journey. We can look at both Jesus and Abraham and see how Father-God was present and proactive in their lives along the way, partnering with them as they moved forward. And when they needed support and blessing, he delivered (with the unique exception of Jesus on the cross).

The present, proactive God will be there for Mary, too, as her faithful Sustainer, holding her firmly throughout her chemotherapy journey and rescuing her from pitfalls. And just like Abraham and Jesus, he will bring her out the other side.

“Hear my prayer, O Lord, and give ear to my cry. Do not be silent at my tears; for I am a…. sojourner like all my fathers.” (Psalm 39:12)

Mary’s Prayer Requests

  1. For good reports on Monday
  2. For God’s peace between now and the meeting with the oncologist
  3. Praise that the pain of the feeding tube has all but subsided
  4. Praise for a morning back at Moody Church!