Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Linda and BobGod knew what he was doing when he led Nate and I to our Michigan cottage. Unbeknownst to us, the couple right next door would rescue us again and again. Bob and Linda have taken it upon themselves to help widows and others who need… well… anything.

Bob is a jack of all trades and cheerfully tackles problems with gusto. He often partners with his friend Gunnar, and the two of them make work look much like play. I’ll never forget the day they came to help when our power went out, the only house in the neighborhood to go dark. After trying all the usual tricks with our old fuse box, they discovered the power line from the house to the street had been slowly strangled by tree bark. Thanks to their creative thinking, I had power that same hour.

Installing the dishwasherA few years ago Bob and Gunnar brought my kitchen into the 21st century by installing a dishwasher. After five weeks of dishes-by-hand virtually around the clock while our family was together that year, I determined that before the relatives returned, I’d have a dishwasher.

As the two men worked, I learned that installing a dishwasher requires creative plumbing and electrical skills, as well as a rib cage strong enough to lean on the sharp edge of an under-sink cabinet for a long, long time.

 

Gunnar and BobOccasionally I heard them say, “Oh oh,” or “What about this?” as they worked half-in and half-out of the cabinet. But when I asked if there was a problem, they laughed and said, “It’ll all be fine.” And it was.

The first time Bob and Gunnar fixed something for us years ago, I remember saying, “Thanks for the help. I’m sure you’d rather do other things  with your afternoon.”

Bob’s interesting retort was, “This is what we like to do.” Because they’ve solved problems for me again and again, I know it’s true.

These men are retired, but not really. They’ve just shifted their work focus. Both love the Lord wholeheartedly and spend a great deal of time volunteering at the church and on outreach projects near and far.

Bob and GunnarThey’ve been first responders to disaster scenes all over the world during their “retirement,” doing whatever needed doing when they got there.

I see these two as the hands and feet of Jesus, putting the interests of “neighbors” ahead of their own. Lucky for me, they often choose to make it a beautiful day for the widow right next door.

“Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself’.” (Matthew 22:37-38)

“I need you!”

Back in 1624, John Donne wrote a meditation that included the sentence, “No man is an island.” Since the beginning of time people have needed each other, beginning with Adam needing Eve. None of us gets life right by ourselves, and the presence of another brings more than just companionship. It often brings wise counsel, too. Asking for advice is a good thing, even scriptural.

Recently I’ve been reminiscing about my own mentor, Aunt Joyce, who advised and encouraged me for 39 years. I clearly remember the day it began. I’d just arrived in California as a 19-year-old for a second happy summer living with my cousins. A mob of us had finished lunch, and everyone had left the table except my aunt and me.

She said, “I know you had a great time here last summer, but you can’t be sure it’ll be the same this year. It could go either way.”

I nodded, thinking about her words long after I’d left the table, since that possibility hadn’t occurred to me. Her counsel had been practical and sensible, and in giving it, she’d put a welcome mat between us, inviting me to come to her any time. And for nearly 4 decades, I took full advantage.

Aunt Joyce, baby Nelson, and meAunt Joyce faithfully prayed for me and offered counsel until she died in 2005, at the age of 92. Most of her guidance came in handwritten letters which I saved, making her wisdom available to me any time. The miles between us never hampered our relationship because the bond we had was a sturdy bridge. Before Aunt Joyce died, she had begun mentoring our daughter Linnea (as well as many from other families) and was spending large chunks of time praying for her and the rest of us.

The beauty of mentoring is its non-threatening, non-pressured atmosphere. Aunt Joyce wasn’t my mother, a police woman, a professor, or a preacher. With all restrictions lifted, she could just be herself, and I could be myself, sharing back and forth without judgment.

We see biblical mentoring throughout Scripture: Joshua mentored by Moses, Mary by Elizabeth, Barnabas by Paul and of course the twelve disciples by Jesus. And just like I still have Aunt Joyce’s letters, each of us is privy to biblical writings containing all manner of wise counsel.

IMG_2755When I lost my earthly mentor, she left a void no other woman could fill, so I asked the Lord if he would be to me what Aunt Joyce had been. Although he often uses a variety of people to bring me through, he’s also just fine with doing it by himself.

“For this God is our God for ever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end.” (Psalm 48:14)

My Father, in Life and Death

For nearly 30 years my dad owned a successful engineering firm, operating out of a Chicago high rise in the concrete canyons of the Loop. As a kid I visited him often (often with girlfriends in tow), admiring the thick glass double doors in his reception area and his big office overlooking the skyline.

BlueprintsDad’s drafting room resembled a Disney studio with its 200 tilted drawing tables and men perched atop tall stools working on royal-colored blueprints. To him, though, it was just a way to earn a living. After retirement at 70, he didn’t look back and never missed it.

Dad did well for a little boy who started school without a word of English. His Swedish immigrant parents worked hard and expected him to do the same, which he did, finishing school with two degrees from Northwestern University.

Attending a Swedish Free Church in the city, he heard the Gospel as a child and received Christ into his life, never wavering in his commitment. A quiet man, he didn’t dictate his faith but lived it out in front of us for 92 years. As Mom frequently said, “Your father is the most Christ-like man I’ve ever known.”

The WillWhen Dad died, his last will and testament was more like a last will and testimony. I read the legal document through, no small task with its complicated legalese, but two paragraphs jumped off the pages. They had nothing to do with trusts or assets, and were written in simple language I understood:

Article II commit my soul into the hands of my Savior in full confidence that, having redeemed it and washed it in His most precious blood, He will present it faultless before my Heavenly Father.

Article IVIt is my hope that the beneficiaries will remember the words of Our Lord who said, “A man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.” (Luke 12:15) Let them consider themselves as stewards of their possessions, not forgetting to use them for the welfare of others, particularly with respect to bringing the Gospel of Jesus Christ to those in spiritual darkness. By giving both time and money unselfishly, they will discover the truth of Our Lord’s words: “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35) and “Whosoever will be chief among you, let him be the servant of all.” (Matthew 20:27)

Dad and MomDad was ready to die, because he had made the main thing the main thing. He’d led a life of quiet sacrifice, serving the poor, giving a hefty percentage of his income to the Lord’s work, and putting himself after everyone else. He’d given much and, as the Bible says will happen to a giving person, he was then given more.

He also left a legacy of harmony in his family, a large group in which there was no fighting, no anger, no bitterness. I remember hundreds of the words he spoke in life but none more vividly than those he left in death. *

“Freely ye have received, freely give.” (Matthew 10:8)

* Re-posted from June, 2011.

Praising and Praying with Mary

Pray about tomorrow’s time at the hospital: for accurate action on the feeding tube pain, for chemo #5, and against the nausea.

I’m thankful for Bervin, the loving father of my children and grandchildren.