Hold on tight!

Posted on September 18, 2013 by Margaret

Most babies and toddlers love bath time. Even though it usually comes at the end of their day when they’re tired and cranky, being set into a warm, bubbly tub brings giggles and pleasure.

Maybe it’s the special toys that come out only then or the guaranteed presence of a parent’s full attention. What babies and toddlers don’t realize, however, is that the adults overseeing bath time usually enjoy it as much as they do. Birgitta and I look forward to Emerald’s bath like it’s a favorite TV show or an entertaining read.

This 10 month old baby is petite for her age, so her pink plastic baby tub worked for nearly 7 months. That made bath time easy for Birgitta, since she propped it in the kitchen sink and didn’t even have to bend over to bathe her. When Emerald outgrew that tub, she went directly into the kitchen sink, a small space of bubbly water she thought was designed especially for her.

Each evening Birgitta and I watch Emerald learn things that are ordinary to us but extraordinary to her -– like how to pop bubbles with her finger or suck on a wet wash cloth to get a drink. This week she’s learning that running water can’t be held in her hands.

We adults figured that out long ago, but have we realized how the same principle can be applied to grown-up issues? Our natural tendency is to hold onto what is precious to us, even when it’s in the process of slipping through our fingers: our spouses, our children, our youthful vigor, our homes, our health, our opinions, our safety. You name it, and we’ve tried to hang onto it.

But no matter how tightly we squeeze, though, these things gradually slip away anyhow, making us worry that one day there won’t be anything left to hold onto. Thankfully, God has a simple solution for that:

“Let go of everything but Me.”

Just when we feel like everybody and everything is disappearing like water through our fingers, at that very moment God gives us the exact directive we want to hear. “Hold on tight!” But what he means is…. to him.

If we’re willing to make him the only thing we cling to, he’ll turn around and take hold of us with a loving grip so strong it will never let us go. And in the process he’ll also fill our empty places with his airtight promises and sustaining strength.

So, our choice is to go through life’s transitions trying to grab what can’t be held (like Emerald’s flowing water), or we can let go of what isn’t ours to hold onto and hang onto what is: the Lord himself.

Jesus said, “No one can snatch [believers] away from me, for my Father has given them to me, and he is more powerful than anyone else. No one can snatch them from the Father’s hand. The Father and I are one.” (John 10:28-30)

Used by God?

Posted on September 12, 2013 by Margaret

All of us who’ve committed our lives to Christ are daily hoping for his approval. Although the world says we ought never to let ourselves be “used” by others, being “used” by God is a privilege. I know from experience that when I let him do what he wants with me, the results are always good. Maybe not immediately, but eventually.

Always.

As my friend Claudia says, “The Father has a way of taking our griefs and hurts and making them diamonds for the Church’s good.” Losing my husband to pancreatic cancer wasn’t “good.” But what God did, as that “bad” settled over me, was to quietly begin laying a foundation that would bring something good in due time.

I’ve been astonished watching him do this for me repeatedly since Nate died. For example, as I struggled to get used to my new widow-status, he urged me to write out my feelings, which ultimately became a devotional book for other widows. Then, when they read how God had stepped into the places Nate had stepped out of, those grieving without hope understood that God was going to bring them, too, out of sadness and into joy.

Later, God sent along speaking opportunities and radio interviews, giving me new places to “boast in the Lord.” (2 Corinthians 10:17) One set of interviews was with Nancy Leigh DeMoss for her radio broadcast “Revive Our Hearts,” and yesterday I received this exciting information from her office:

Coming up next week on “Revive Our Hearts” broadcast with Nancy Leigh DeMoss: “Hope for an Aching Heart,” with Margaret Nyman

Margaret says widowhood is a beginning. It’s an opportunity to walk with the Lord in new ways, taking on new challenges.

Sept. 16, 2013 – Sept. 20, 2013

On these scheduled airdates, the streaming, download, and podcast audio of this broadcast and a written transcript will appear on our radio page— www.ReviveOurHearts.com/radio/revive-our-hearts/.

On this page you will also find a list of local radio stations that carry the program in your area.

* * * * * * *

This email was simultaneously thrilling and threatening. Since our recording sessions took place over a year ago, I’ve forgotten much of what was said in the 5 programs and today became very nervous. Did I contradict myself or say things that might offend listeners? Did I mix up the details or misquote my own book?

As stomach butterflies demoralized me, God tapped me on the shoulder. “Don’t forget,” he said, “these opportunities were my doing, not yours, so I’ll take full responsibility for the results.”

I had two quick responses:

Whew!
Can’t wait to see the results!

To win God’s approval, all we need to do is step squarely into whatever plans he makes for us (no matter how unnerving), expecting him to manage the unknowns. When we do, we’ll realize the highest of callings: to be “used” by him.

“I’m only concerned with your plans for me. I see the limits to everything human, but the horizons can’t contain your commands!” (Psalm 119:95-96, The Message)

Ok. You lead.

Posted on September 11, 2013 by Margaret

When our Nelson was two years old, he was dynamite, and I wasn’t the best mother for this headstrong, impulsive child, being a first-timer with no experience. For example, I remember one day when the two of us visited my aunt for lunch. She lived in a high-rise building on a busy four-lane street. After lunch, as we walked outside, little Nelson (who loved cars and trucks) saw the whizzing traffic and made a bee-line for the street.

“Nelson!” I shouted. “NELSON!” But he was a boy on a mission, passionate about pursuing his own plan, and didn’t look back. Dropping my bags and racing after him, I could see he was going to get to the street before I could get to him, and I was desperate to stop him.

Nate and I had tried to teach this little boy about the dangers of traffic. We’d done our best to lead him sensibly, counting on him to trust our wisdom over his own. But as all two year olds know, their personal agendas trump parental ones.

But what about us adults? Are we any different in our dealings with God? What does it take for us to set our own plans aside and sincerely say to him, “Ok. You lead.”

It’s very possible God sees us as we see our children. He has the ability to teach us how to live well and lead us one step at a time in that direction. And since he’s God, there’s no question his leadership is superior to ours. Despite that, though, we often choose to do our own thing rather than his.

None of us would argue with the idea that God is a fabulous leader, not just of individuals but also of families, churches, businesses, and governments. We can find a variety of scriptural examples showing us what happens when people follow his lead and what happens when they don’t.

“See those?” he says. “So how ’bout we do it my way?” And yet we still refuse.

It’s not that we doubt him as a leader. We all know he has both the ability and the longing to direct us perfectly. The problem comes with his one prerequisite: surrendering self-management. And even a two year old can tell you, that doesn’t come easy.

When Nelson was dashing pell-mell toward high speed traffic, I was frantic to stop him before he got hit by a car. All I could think to do was shout the only word I knew might stop him:

“CANDY!”

Nelson heard it, stopped at curb, and turned in my direction. It was just enough time for me to arrive and grab him, the perfect case of my leadership being superior to his. Surrendering his personal car-truck agenda for my candy-plan gave him the best outcome by far.