Category Archives: God’s plans for us

Full Hands

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OpenThis morning the pastor preached about being generous with our time, both to God and others. Before he began with prayer, he asked if we’d all put our hands out in front of us, palms up, as an outward sign of inner readiness to receive from God. Though I’d never done that before, today I did, mostly because I wanted to be on the receiving end from him.

God didn’t waste any time in making his deposit. After the pastor’s “amen,” I glanced to my right where I saw Birgitta’s hands still upturned. Resting in them was the sweet head of her little Emerald looking up at her, and that’s when God made his deposit. “See those hands?” he said to me. “Birgitta didn’t have to ask me to fill them this morning. They’re full with Emerald.”

Hands full of Emerald

I thought of the freeing nature of Birgitta’s not having to wonder what to do with her time. Her God-given assignment was literally in her hands. Sure, she’s added university classes and other things, but Emerald is God’s #1 for her. And he’s willing, even eager, to give each of us a #1.

So how do we know when our hands are already full with his choice or if it’s time to turn palms up for a new deposit?

I remember a day one year ago, before I learned Birgitta was pregnant. I’d finished a busy period writing Hope for an Aching Heart and had a little time on my hands for the first time since before Nate died. Then one afternoon I found myself rifling through a basement bin of old videos.

Finding a boxed season of “Little House on the Prairie,” I took it upstairs, got something to eat, and put on the first show. When it finished, I clicked into a 2nd, and when I realized I’d been sitting there nearly 2 hours already and was contemplating watching a 3rd, I couldn’t believe it.

The next morning I asked God how he wanted me to use my new-found time, knowing his answer wouldn’t be, “Watch videos.” This was a moment when open hands, palms up, would have been a good idea. His prior #1 had been completed, and he was about to give me a new assignment. I didn’t know it then, but soon I’d be helping Birgitta and Emerald. Coupled with that, he was also going to give me a new book to write.

And so today in church, God did deposit a message into my open palms. It was this: “I’ve already filled your hands for now. When it’s time for a refill, I’ll let you know.”

Little House DVDs

(And he’ll probably do it when I’m back in the basement, rifling through a bin of videos.)

“It is not for you to know times or seasons that the Father has fixed by his own authority.” (Acts 1:7)

Selfish or Selfless?

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My little house has 3 bedrooms: one large, one medium, and one closet-sized. We’ve taken the large bedroom and made it more like a camp cabin, putting the emphasis on sleeping space.

The room has a variety of beds with one king, one double, one twin, one twin-size floor mat, room for another twin in the closet and two mattresses stuffed under existing beds. Although there are ample blankets and pillows (at one point I counted 32 pillows), once in a while there are still problems.

“I need a flat pillow… a fluffy one… one without feathers.”

Or, “Where’s my favorite pillow?”

As the pillows get passed around, “favorites” get lost. Since I’m lucky enough to sleep in a different room, I have charge of my own favorite pillow. But one day I decided to choose (and hide) a spare, just in case.

I plucked one of the best pillows from the pile with just the right depth and feel, wrapped it in a plastic bag, and stashed it under my bed. That way, if anyone “borrowed” my bed pillow and failed to return it, my back-up would be ready. And then I promptly forgot about it.

Stashed

Several years passed until yesterday, when I was in a cleaning frenzy and decided to pull everything out from under my dressers and bed. There were old Christmas cards, sandals, a bin of papers, extension cords, a folded rug, boots…. and my pillow. I hadn’t even remembered it was there.

The pillow was still clean and in great condition, but as I pulled it out of the bag, it struck me what a waste it had been to stuff it under my bed like that. Truthfully, it was selfish and might even have qualified as hoarding, which is “to accumulate a supply of something that’s hidden or carefully guarded for preservation or future use.”

That’s exactly what I was doing with my pillow. If I was a squirrel, hoarding would have been commendable, but in my case, I was just refusing to share.

A pillow may be a small thing, and we had 31 others people were able to use. But the principle of withholding something good so others can’t use it and saving it for self is a serious fault.

Even more important than sharing a pillow, however, is sharing the other things God gives us, like spiritual blessings. For example, if we’re saved by Jesus, we should eagerly introduce him to others. If we’ve been given spiritual insights, we should willingly share them. And if we have opportunities to serve someone in need, we should offer to do so. Spiritual blessings that are hoarded put us in disobedience to the Lord.

But God knows that sometimes sharing is really hard. Once in a while it goes against our natural leanings so significantly that it’s a major sacrifice to do it. But that’s what makes it valuable to him and important for us. In my case, maybe it would be easier to share if I looked at every selfish impulse in the light of God’s opinion.

If I did, I know I’d never again stuff a pillow under my bed.

“Do not neglect doing good and sharing, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.” (Hebrews 13:16)

The Relief of Restful Days

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This morning my Spurgeon reading included a note about Nate and his experience. The reading began with a familiar verse from Matthew:

“Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (11:28)

Spurgeon

I read Spurgeon’s commentary and then glanced at the notes in the margins, written in past years. A penned note said, “Nate [at the cottage] soul-searching, 1/14, 1/15, 1/16, 2005.”

I remember that weekend well. He was up to his nose in frustrations and had dropped to a low place emotionally. When he suggested he take a day or two away to think and pray, I heartily agreed and happily volunteered to handle the home front in his absence.

We both decided to fast throughout those 3 days, hoping God would somehow apply food sacrifices to our prayers about the weekend. My journal entries were a mass of requests about my husband and his struggles at that time, but there were also cries for good gifts to be given to him. For example, I prayed God would give him the rest he so badly needed.

When I’d opened Spurgeon’s reading on January 14, 2005, here’s what I’d found: “Jesus gives rest. It is so. Will you believe it? Will you put it to the test? Will you do so at once? Come to Jesus by…. trusting everything to him. If you thus come to him, the rest will be deep, safe, holy, and everlasting.”

Today when I re-read it (8 years later), it was the next sentence that impacted me most. Spurgeon wrote, “Jesus gives a rest which develops into heaven.” It’s an interesting framework for the Matthew promise, and Nate’s move into everlasting rest in 2009 was visible concurrence with that unusual statement.

When God delivered, he did it big-time. He said, “Come to me,” and Nate came. He said, “I’ll give you rest from your heavy-laden condition,” and Nate accepted.

On earth we can only observe backwards, but we can be sure beyond all doubt that in front of us lies relief and rest from every burden. Or, as Spurgeon put it, “Every heavy-laden one [will] cease from bowing down under the enormous pressure.”

Nate didn’t buckle during his remaining time on earth, and as he continued bearing the burdens he was handed (which included killer-cancer), he had no idea complete relief was fairly close at hand. Just a reminder to himself that this was true might have been a relief all by itself, which is something that should encourage the rest of us today still living in a world chock-full of burdens.

Nate kept his own journal on that weekend away, which included several prayers. In one of them he wrote, “Let me breathe the sweet, clean, pure air-of-life that You want for me.”

And not too much later, God did.

“You will fill me with joy in your presence.” (Psalm 16:11)