A Man of Integrity

Today is the 20th anniversary of my Dad’s death in 1991. He married for the first time at 42 and was privileged to hit the 50 year mark with Mom, shortly before he died. Although he didn’t have even one health issue at the ripe old age of 92, a fall that splintered his pelvis into 13 pieces proved fatal. Although a young person could have tolerated traction for so long, immobilizing an elderly man worked against his survival.

Dad was born in 1899, a fact we children flaunted on school playgrounds. Mom used to say he was a contemporary of D.L.Moody who died 3 months after Dad was born. As a kid I used to reason that older was wiser, so Dad must have been the wisest father around.

The first child of parents who’d immigrated to America as teens, Dad spoke only Swedish when he walked into 1st grade at age 6. But he was quiet and observant, quickly learning English and other American ways, like how to avoid the knuckle-smack of an angry public school teacher.

He lost a little brother to pneumonia when he was 12, and his mother to TB at 13. After helping raise two younger siblings then training with the Army during World War I, he rode a streetcar to Northwestern University and emerged with two degrees. He navigated the Great Depression as a 30-something, and worked tirelessly to preserve his dying father’s real estate business.

My sister, brother and I loved hearing stories about the early 20th century, viewing him as a walking, talking history book. As a kid he chased after horse-drawn ice wagons hoping for loose chips on a hot day, and watched donkeys drag wagons of dirt out of hand-dug tunnels, Chicago’s eventual subway system. The city was paved with mud, election results were announced with fireworks, and all of it fascinated us.

Dad was honest to a fault. If a letter arrived with the stamp uncanceled, he’d say, “You can’t reuse that stamp, you know. It did what it was bought to do, and using it again would be robbing the postal service.” Letters only cost two cents then, but his statement was more about integrity than money.

Despite a bumpy background, Dad never experienced self-pity or bemoaned his losses, accepting life as it was. Although he wasn’t demonstrative and rarely shared his emotions, we all knew he loved us and would do anything in his power to help us. We also knew he gave 50% of his income to God’s work at the peak of his business career, which spoke volumes about his faith priorities.

My siblings and I were given a gift in Dad, but also a responsibility. Scripture says, “When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” (Luke 12:48)

And then there was Dad, who had much taken, but gave more than he’d been given anyway.

“Those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.” (1 Corinthians 4:2)

 

 

Overloaded

Today while running errands I was waiting at a light when a spectacular semi-truck turned in front of me. It had more tires than I’d ever seen on one vehicle, all doubles, 4 to an axle except on the cab. As it drove past, I counted: 36 wheels.

All I could think of was how difficult it must be to keep that many tires in good shape simultaneously. Are they wearing properly and balanced correctly? Are their lug nuts snug? Rotating tires must be a nightmare similar to playing Mancala with game pieces too heavy to lift.

Why so many wheels?  The answer is, tons of weight inside.

It made me think of all the excess weight we carry, not in pounds but in burdens. Trouble comes when we try to carry too much on only 2 wheels.

This morning in Bible study we were in Exodus, reading how Moses was trying to lead a million obstreperous people through miserable circumstances. He was doing the best he could, but it wasn’t good enough. He didn’t have enough wheels to hold up his heavy load, and it was ruining him.

God saw the problem and brought Moses’ father-in-law, Jethro, to the massive Israelite camp at exactly the right time. In learning how burdened Moses was he said, “The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” (Exodus 18:18)

So God planted a fresh idea in Jethro’s mind, and Jethro passed it along to Moses. The heavy weight was quickly redistributed to helper-judges, which gave Moses the 36 wheels he needed to continue moving the massive group forward.

Years later he again found himself weighed down by the impossible burden of his role. The people were crushing him with their complaints, so once again he went to God. “I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me.” (Numbers 11:14) It was time for a new set of tires. God provided them again in the form of many able helpers, and Moses’ load was lifted.

What about our 21st century loads? More often than not we take on impossible weight, dragging under the heavy burden while trying to give the impression we’re living feather-light. When others see us bent beneath our loads and ask if they can help, we say, ”No thanks,” not wanting to add to their loads. But as we learned in Bible study this morning, if we accept the help of others, a blessing comes to them as well as to us.

Moses modeled what to do when we’re overloaded. Step 1: ask God to lighten it up. Step 2: listen for how. We’re to avoid the extremes of either asking no one, or asking many of the wrong ones, because our best burden-lifter will always be God.

Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.” (Psalm 68:19)

“May God go with you.” (…continued)

As Thelma and I slowly continued on up the paved dune searching for Jack, she began telling stories. “I’ve rescued a lot of dogs from shelters. Most of ‘em look pretty good after a thorough scrubbing.”

Although we didn’t see Jack, we did see the car he’d followed, parked in front of one of the high-up cottages. If we couldn’t find him, I would double back and check there.

Continuing around several curves, we began moving down and eventually came to the spot where Jack had become confused. There he was, standing in the rain as if to say, “I was here. Where were you?”

Panting from his long loop up the road and down again, he gratefully hopped into the back seat, immediately leaning forward to get sniff-acquainted with Thelma. His tail wagged enthusiastically, and reaching back to pat his head, she said, “I told you. Dogs love me.”

Heading out of the subdivision, I listened to her describe how she liked helping people clean up their yards, saying it took her many sessions to complete one. “You gotta work on ‘em slow and steady. There’s too many leaves for one time.” She listed the names of those she’d already raked, and I recognized many of them.

Driving out into the country I said, “You’ll have to tell me which way to go.”

“Just keep on goin’,” she said, pointing out the front windshield.

Sure enough, about 6 miles inland from Lake Michigan she finally said, “There,” pointing to a small wooden house. “That’s where I live.”

As she got out of the car I rolled down the window, letting the rain pour in. She thanked me and nodded toward the house. “It’s adequate. More important, it was built with love. God has always taken good care of me.”

She patted the wet car as she walked alongside it, probably for support, and then turned around and said, “God go with you.”

I waited in the driveway to be sure she would get in, but she was playing a waiting game, too, making sure I backed out safely. As we both looked at each other, her hand on the doorknob and mine on the steering wheel, it was as if God said, “I love Thelma. Make sure you do, too.”

Eventually I waved through my open window and backed away, praying the prayer I so often pray: “Lord, what do you want me to think about all this?”

And he gave me this thought: “Think about how Thelma trusts me to take care of her. Today I coaxed Jack to follow the wrong car so I could give her a ride home. Without him running off, you wouldn’t have seen her. I set it up for her, and lucky you. You got to deliver it.”

Then he said something else. “See how I care for Thelma? I’ll always do the same for you.”

The Lord said, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” (Jeremiah 31:3)