Young Love (#137)

November 29, 1969… 9:00 PM

In a last flurry of picture-taking toward the end of our wedding, we wanted to be sure to gather some of those who had come from far and wide to attend. One group was from my 1967 graduating class at Wheaton College.

Wheaton chronies

Among these was the couple who had introduced Nate and I, back in the fall of 1966.

Kathy

 

Kathy was one of my best college pals, and we were especially close during senior year. Being from Nebraska, she didn’t get home much, but Mom made her feel welcome at our house. We went to Wilmette together on many weekends and often acted goofy together, too.

 

 

SongstersFor example, we sang mock-operatic duets in front of anyone who would listen and experienced our 15 minutes of fame at Wheaton singing in a talent show —  making fools of ourselves but having a great time doing it.

Kathy was engaged to a guy named Bob who attended Northwestern University in Evanston, Illinois. Without a car between them, they virtually never saw each other, since the two colleges were 30 miles apart. But I often had access to Mom’s station wagon, and when I did, Kathy begged for a ride to see her fiancé.

BobOne day Kathy said, “Bob and I should get you dating a Northwestern man so you’ll want to drive there all the time. Then I’ll ride along! Bob knows a really handsome Swedish guy you would love. Smart, too.”

I didn’t think much of it, but then it happened.

Kathy and I drove the station wagon to Wilmette for the weekend, and I dropped her off on the Northwestern campus to see Bob. Proceeding home, I dumped the contents of my laundry bag into Mom’s wash machine, showered and washed my hair, pulled on an old flannel nightgown, and climbed into bed with a book.

About 10:00 PM the phone rang. “Come down here right away!” Kathy said. “We’re at The Huddle ice cream parlor, and we have the Swedish guy with us. He wants to meet you!”

I was casually dating several other boys at the time and knew blind dates didn’t usually go well. “I’m already in bed!” I said, trying to beg off. “My hair is wet, and I have nothing to wear.”

“We told him you were coming,” she said, putting me in a fix. “We won’t order till you get here.”

Though I was mad at Kathy, I was also curious. Handsome? Smart? Swedish? I had to see. But what to wear?

The coatI had a new coat in federal blue that buttoned to the chin with a Peter Pan collar – I called it my “Jackie Kennedy coat.” (…pictured here after 3 years of hard wear.) Paired with my knee-high boots, I would look “dressed,” as long as I didn’t take my coat off. (The only thing beneath it was white underwear.)

As I walked into the ice cream parlor, they spotted me right away. My blind date jumped to his feet, and I remember thinking how glorious his blond hair was. After quick introductions, Nate pulled out a chair for me and said, “May I take your coat?”

It was a balmy October evening. “No thanks,” I said. “I’m a little chilly.”

As we ate our chocolate sundaes, Nate asked twice more if he could take my coat. It was awkward to refuse, but I couldn’t do otherwise.

After a couple of interesting conversational hours, Kathy and I dropped the boys at their college housing and drove on to Wilmette. “Why were you so rude to him?” she said. “He was trying to be polite, and you wouldn’t even let him take your coat!”

I explained about the wash machine and then unbuttoned myself. “Here’s why,” I said.

She saw my underwear and howled with laughter. Two weeks went by before Nate called for a second date, but after that, the 4 of us got together frequently, and Kathy got all the rides she wanted to Northwestern and to Bob.

Bob and KathyOn our wedding day, Nate and I were especially thankful for these match-making friends – and that they were willing to stand up for us as we got married.

“The pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice.” (Proverbs 27:9)

Young Love (#135)

November 29, 1969… 7:00 PM

a BIG cake.It wasn’t until Nate and I had moved into the wedding reception room that we got our first look at the cake. I wondered why those 6 heavy layers didn’t collapse on each other with all that weight. Maybe hidden pillars had been baked inside, allowing each layer to rest on a firm foundation. We didn’t dare walk too close.

Although Nate had never been in love with sugar, I was a total sweets-freak and couldn’t wait to sample it. When the time finally came, it wasn’t without strict guidelines by the caterer. She, in turn, had been instructed by the bakery lady, who had marked exactly where we were to cut.

As we carefully followed the marks, hand-over-hand on the knife, I had a flashback to a childhood beach game called “Cut the Cake.” Kids would make a sand-cake with a toy bucket, then take turns slicing away pieces. At one point the whole thing would collapse.

Cutting.

 

But this was no game, and I hoped a cake-collapse wasn’t in our immediate future. We used a very sharp knife, and the caterer tutored us through the process. But still, it was a relief when the cutting part was finally done.

Tasty

 

 

 

 

Then it was time to taste! Nate didn’t savor his mouthful as much as I did, so after licking my fingers, I licked his, too. Delicious!

 

 

Cousin Patti approached then, wanting us to sign the guest book. She was following through on what we’d asked by getting everyone’s signature… even ours. But it made sense, since we, too, were wedding guests of the hosts: Mom and Dad.

Crown troublesNate asked how he should sign and suggested we use our new partnership to identify us. “How about Mr. and Mrs. Nathan Nyman?”

I loved knowing that the first use of my new Nyman-name would be in our wedding guestbook and agreed it was a great way to begin. Although the budding feminist  movement of the sixties would bristle at my not using my given name, I loved my new “Mrs.-Status” and was delighted to be partnered with this particular Mr. To me it was the perfect signature for the day.

Marriage CertificateWhile we were signing the guest book, Pastor Sweeting was getting signatures from the maid of honor and best man on a marriage certificate. Although it wasn’t as official as the marriage license we’d secured earlier at the Chicago City Clerk’s office, it did prove that Pastor Sweeting was the one who had tied the knot.

And then it was time for everyone to sit down again for our short program.

This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands.” (1 Peter 3:5-6)

Young Love (#133)

November 29, 1969… 6:30 PM

Our wedding was very solemn. We’d wanted it like that, especially after Pastor Sweeting had challenged us to make it so. Partying would come later, but as we were actually being ushered into marriage, we hoped there would be no silliness, no nervous laughter, no antics from the children. And there weren’t.

Pastor Sweeting.The pastor had told us that all the couples he married were special to him forever-after. When we met with him weeks before the ceremony, he said that by marrying us, he was voluntarily taking on some of the responsibility for seeing to it that our marriage was a success. “If you ever come to a place in your relationship, where things get too hard to handle, please come to me, and we’ll work it out together. Remember that.”

We agreed, but on that day, standing at the starting line, we couldn’t imagine ever having a lick of trouble before we reached the finish line.

Once all of us were assembled at the front of the church, the bridesmaids sang “Thanks be to God.” Without 7 microphones in front of them, the congregation didn’t get to hear the words as well as Nate and I did, but the message of the song was perfect for the occasion, and I was so grateful they’d been willing to sing.

Thanks be to God for love divine, 
The hope that round my heart entwines. 
For all the joy that now is mine, 
Thanks be to God.

When we came to the part of the service where Nate and I would say our vows, we faced each other, holding hands, and the pastor nodded for him to start. He recited each line perfectly, looking me square in the eye without any nervousness. I could see the depth of his sincerity on his face and drank in every word.

Then it was my turn. I had the feeling I was going to fail, but I forged ahead, knowing the pastor would help if I went blank.

Ceremony

“I Margaret, take thee Nathan, to be my wedded husband, from this day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health…” and… what came next? I knew I’d skipped something, but kept going.

“…to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God’s holy ordinance, and thereto I give thee my word.”

Pastor Sweeting moved on as if I’d said it all without a mistake, and of course the minute I finished, I remembered the part I’d missed: “for richer or poorer.” I’d have to explain later.

Happy

 

In just a few more minutes the pastor was announcing us as “Mr. and Mrs. Nathan Nyman!” and everybody clapped. An exhilarating ripple went up my spine like none I’d ever felt, and as we headed back up the aisle, we clung to each other – like two who’d just “become one.”

 

Happy.

 

 

 

Nate couldn’t wait to get to the back of the church, and we picked up speed as we walked up the aisle. Once we’d cleared the back doors, he grabbed me up off the floor in a big hug and began spinning me around.

 

Happy..

 

I laughed with joy as my long train and veil wrapped around us like fancy gift-paper. We shared a very special kiss, and as our wedding party joined us two-by-two, we were still twirling.

Happy...

 

 

 

From that point on, my crown was askew, but it was a small price to pay to get that passionate, timely kiss… a kiss that sealed our marriage, a kiss I’d never forget.

“Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” (Matthew 19:6)