Category Archives: God’s timing

Surprises–Good and Bad

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Christmas time is full of surprises, most of them good. But 48 hours ago Nelson got a surprise none of us would want. After an exhausting day of appointments at Mayo Clinic there in Minnesota, he found himself being admitted to the hospital—his absolute last choice of things to do at Christmas—or any time.

He’s had new breathing struggles with his lung cancer, and on top of that, he’s been suffering severely from what appears to be breaking bones. It began with a neck bone, which finally healed after about six weeks of misery, followed by breaks in a rib, a back vertebrae, his pelvis, hip, and most recently, his knee. Each of these has been accompanied by relentless sharp pain, though Nelson has done a stellar job of remaining on his feet with the assistance of a cane, and staying as active as he can be.

Last week doctors intensified their testing of the bones and learned that the cancer cells have been doing their dirty work on the marrow, weakening the bones to the point of fractures. The doctor said he shouldn’t be putting any weight on his right leg where most of the pain is, because x-rays showed his femur had dangerously thinned and in some places was actually paper-thin. This is when they admitted him to the hospital.

Doctors weren’t sure he could withstand surgery because of his many risk factors, especially his breathing issues, but there wasn’t much choice. So yesterday they operated, putting a long rod into his thigh and stabilizing his hip so it won’t fully break. Nelson did great after the surgery, and Ann Sophie has been in there fighting for her husband’s welfare at every turn, morning, noon and night.

It’s not a surprise that Nelson is angling to get discharged ASAP, but doctors have found a puzzling white substance on the wall of one lung and believe that whatever it is, this is what’s causing his new breathing troubles. So of course they won’t let him go home until they can figure that out.

Meanwhile, little Will just turned nine months and is enjoying his first sled ride. Ann Sophie’s mom and dad, a couple of very hearty grandparents, are working hard on the home front to make everything run smoothly. I marvel at how their cheerful spirits and big smiles never end. Surely their heavenly crowns will be loaded with jewels!

Nelson’s repaired leg can now bear his weight, and he can walk, with the stabilizing support of his cane. His immuno-chemo pills have been temporarily set aside while he recovers from surgery. And yesterday, the cancer itself got a surprise. While the surgeon was inside Nelson’s leg, he zapped all the cancer cells with radiation. At least those cells won’t have their way with Nelson.

We all thank you greatly for your prayers as you battle this terrible disease shoulder-to-shoulder with us. Those prayers are the best Christmas gift ever!

“Answer [us] when [we] call to you, [our] righteous God. Give [Nelson] relief from [his] distress; have mercy on [him] and hear [our] prayers.” (Psalm 4:1)

Try not to worry…

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This is Nelson’s mom Margaret, writing for Nelson tonight. I’ve been here in Minnesota for a few days, enjoying the company of Nelson, Ann Sophie, little Will and his other grandparents, Astrid and Ralph, from Germany.

Since Nelson last posted a blog, he and his family have made the move from a rented apartment to the new home they’ve bought. Owning a home that’s two blocks from the many buildings of the Mayo Clinic is a big advantage for someone who finds himself needing the services there, many times each week. For example, Nelson has one appointment tomorrow and four more on Friday. But as a result of him being so frequently at Mayo’s, his cancer cells are on the run. And that’s the whole point.

But none of it comes without a price. The stronger the treatment, the harder to bear. After weeks of taking the daily doses of two powerful immuno-chemotherapy drugs, Nelson’s liver had recently begun to show signs of deterioration. His medical team decided to give his suffering body and his liver a week-long break, hoping Nelson and his liver would both benefit.

During this time, Nelson felt much better—except for the severe pain in his hip that radiates down the back of his leg. This pain began in his lower back where scans showed cancer cells in his bone marrow weakening the bone and causing a vertebrae to crack. That pain then radiated gradually toward his hip, and eventually down his leg.

There is no spinal stenosis, for which we’re happy, but Nelson’s pain has been debilitating. Scans show the cause as a pinched nerve between the spine and the pelvis. He can’t walk except with his new cane—a lifesaver. Without that, he wouldn’t be up and about, so the cane is something to be grateful for.

Scans have also shown that the bone marrow is breaking down in other places in Nelson’s body too, so we’re all praying against any more of that, and against worrying about it, too.

On Monday, the doctors put Nelson back on those powerful drugs that always take him down with high fevers, sudden shaking chills, and lots of vomiting. But same drugs also kill cancer cells. The doctors altered the dosage slightly to determine which of the two drugs is the one harming the liver. Despite acute suffering while formerly on these drugs, Nelson was all “yes” on resuming them. It’s a love-hate relationship but is the only medical tool left in his toolbox.

Despite all that, last night God gave Nelson the best night’s sleep in a long time (in the chair), and this morning he felt well enough to head for the basement in the new house (actually an older home) to do some work on shelving. Days of this kind of energy are few and far between, but when they come, they bring joy and encouragement.

In Nelson’s last blog he shared about an infection in his left side around the catheter they were using to drain his lung. They prescribed antibiotics, and those have worked their magic. The infection is gone, and the redness, too. The right lung catheter has been reinstalled and is once again being drained daily (250-300 milliliters).

Ann Sophie’s parents, Astrid and Ralph, have worked like troopers the entire time they’ve been in the USA, cooking meals, babysitting, chauffeuring, packing, unpacking, shopping, painting, helping in every way imaginable. They are amazing all of us as they bring their stamina and strong work ethic to every task. Ad their willingness doesn’t end.

Today, Ann Sophie and I had fun unpacking a few more boxes and rearranging  the sunroom, which for now is baby Will’s new bedroom. It’s a cooler place to sleep, but his new sleep sack keeps him toasty warm. Despite the serious nature of these difficult days of dealing with cancer, having Will in the middle of things brings laughter and light-heartedness to us all. He helps us remember that God’s instructions are:

“Do not be anxious about tomorrow…” (Matthew 6:34)

The God-Factor

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Ann Sophie, Will, and Astrid came back from Germany last night and I’m so glad they’re here again. They attended a memorial service for Annso’s grandmother who passed away last week among other things. I’m reminded that I also almost passed away earlier this year.

But at 49 years old, I thought I had lots more time. It turns out I might have been right at the end without even knowing it. 

Was I ready if the end did come? I’d like to think so. 

For now, I’m taking chemo meds every morning and every night doing whatever I can to stick around as long as I possibly can and the results are looking good. I have more to live for than ever before! 

On a different note, I got a follow-up call yesterday from a guy at the US Social Security office who wanted to work on finishing up my application for a disability benefit.

When he asked about my disability and heard me say “stage 4 lung Cancer”, he told me I would definitely qualify and that the payout would be labelled a ‘compassion benefit’. It would also carry on for Annso and Will in my absence. He didn’t come right out and say it, but thankfully, the benefit would continue even if I did not. 

What a wonderful thing, and for it, I’m very thankful, but it’s also sobering in another sense when statistically the world sees you as a man who will not be alive 5 years from now. Think about it. How would you feel if you knew that you would be gone within the next 5 years?

Then later the same day, Mom and I went to a check-up at the Mayo Clinic. My Mom is the queen of questions and she kept on firing away at the doc. One thing she asked was, “If the chemo meds have worked this good so far, can we expect them to keep working this way until the cancer is eventually totally gone?” 

We got more sobering news.

The doc said in her experience, there will be a plaining off then sometimes a turn before the cancer starts to grow again. But, at that point, we will come up with another plan.

“Wait a second, what?”

The effect this info had on me were strong reminders that I’m not out of the woods at all, that this kind of cancer is resilient and resistant to even the best treatment… and that most of the time, the medical community encounters some road blocks to a smooth, speedy recovery… even with a genetic match and some of the most advanced chemo treatment available.

Apparently, the ‘Match’ they found for me is not guaranteed to be the Silver Bullet I was hoping it would be. hmmm. 

Once Mom and I were in the elevator talking about the meeting, I shared how I felt. “Twice today, I was basically told by professionals that I won’t be around long.”

Without skipping a beat, Mom said quickly, “But they’re leaving out the God-Factor!” 

Yes! The God-factor! Of course, how could I forget that?

With only science and medicine, we can go part of the way, but it’s faith in the Creator of all life that finally brings the ship ashore. Common sense and reason only take me part of the way.

It’s faith that brings me home!