As a mother of young children, I was never a consistent disciplinarian. Having had a mom whose M.O. was to “let the kids have fun,” I didn’t know how to do it, and besides, being the bad guy was hard work. So I schlepped along, hit-and-miss, and it’s only God’s grace that brought my children through.
Jesus was never a parent, but we get glimpses of his parenting skills throughout the Gospels. I love to read how he got frustrated with his disciple-children once in a while, because all parents have those same exasperating moments.
Kids know in their hearts that parents have their best interests in mind when they set the rules, but a desire to “do their own thing” is often stronger than the will to comply. I saw a recent example of that in my granddaughter Skylar:
This energetic, creative little girl is, at 4½, something of an expert on family relations. Last week when we were visiting, the whole family was working toward a birthday dinner for her little sister, Autumn. Company was coming at 5:00, and there was much to do. Linnea called to Skylar, asking if she’d please come into the kitchen to help her.
Skylar’s reply was interesting. “Mommy, I’d love to help you a whole bunch, but I first have to deal with one of my pets who is having a birthday party tonight also.”
Her comment reminded me of the Bible story where 3 men expressed an interest in joining the ranks of disciples following Jesus. Their words said they were all-in, “a whole bunch,” but the excuses they gave as to why they couldn’t do it right-this-minute fell flat with Jesus.
These unnamed men had no concept of what they were about to give up by making excuses. They believed Jesus was their wondrous Messiah, but incredibly, after this conversation with the Son of God, they chose to go their own way.
Jesus did, too.
I shake my head and think, “They could have had one-on-one teaching from the Master! They could have watched his every move, listened to every conversation, gleaned how righteous living worked. They could have followed him all the way to the cross, to the Garden Tomb, and even to Resurrection Day! By making excuses, they forfeited it all.”
But am I any better? Hasn’t God asked me to do this or that when I’ve said, “Good idea, Lord. I’ll definitely get around to that somewhere along the way.” When I respond in that maybe-later way, do these God-structured opportunities evaporate? Does he come back later? Or does he go and ask a more obedient “child?”
What treasured opportunities have I forfeited?
Skylar didn’t get away with her bogus excuse, since Linnea and Adam are much better at disciplinary follow-through than I ever was. But as for Jesus, I have a hunch he usually leaves it up to us.
“Yes, Lord, I will follow you, but first let me say good-bye to my family.” (Luke 9:61)
