Category Archives: Hearing from God

In a Safe Place

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It’s not uncommon for me to put things away so well I can’t remember where they are. They aren’t lost, just hiding. The worst of it is that the more important the item, the harder it is to find.

More often than not, when I put these important items “away,” I’ll tell myself, “Take note. You’re putting this next to the computer paper in the hall closet.” Or, “Remember now. It’s in the far back right corner of your dresser drawer.” I take a good look, locking in the details and then walk away – forgetting.

Case in point: Last spring I was given a special key. It opened my church. I needed it for an evening ministry commitment when the church staff would be gone and the church locked. With my own key, I didn’t have to call for assistance but could open the door for our gathering, then lock it as we left.

The key found a safe spot on my car key ring, and it went along with me wherever I went. But then the time came to return the key. I removed it from the key ring and put it in a “safe place” to await my next trip to the church.

A few days later, when I looked for it, it was nowhere. I squeezed my eyes tight, trying to picture myself hiding it, coaxing my brain to think as I might have thought then. And then I started hunting. I moved every piece of furniture, swept thoroughly, emptied drawers and closet shelves. I prayed. I pleaded with God. I begged, crying out to him for help. As I talked to him, I knew he was looking right at that elusive key. Why wouldn’t he tell me where it was?

Days went by. Then weeks. I kept looking… to no avail.

When nine of my grandchildren came for a visit (the reason I had put the key in a safe place), I taped a five dollar bill to the computer screen and drew a picture of the missing key and it’s blue key fob. “Whoever finds it gets the money.” And oh how they searched! They were out under the bushes, and checking garbage bags, and searching through the car. But when those two weeks ended and they’d all gone home, the key was still at large.

Though I didn’t stop looking, I began writing a speech in my mind, a tail-between-the-legs apology to the pastor for having lost the church key.

But then…

“Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath! (Psalm 116:2 NLT)

 

Sneak Peek #25

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Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

How well I recall the morning I got an “F” in mothering. Still in my pajamas, I had gathered my Bible, notebook, pen, and mug of coffee. Tiptoeing past the stairs toward the living room, eager to eat a spiritual breakfast, I glanced up to see our toddler sitting on the top step . . . already! When he saw me come around the corner, his face lit up, and he greeted me in his usual cheery fashion. “Mama!”

In a split second my face fell, going from neutral to angry, exactly as our eyes met. Thinking only of myself, I let out a low moan. This child had robbed me of something valuable. My treasure had been blown out of the room by the cold wind of an interruption I was having trouble accepting. And there the two of us froze, a chasm of disconnect between us.

“Why are you out of bed so early?” I said with irritation, knowing this was a question no toddler could answer. Still caught up with my own agenda, it took a minute for my displeasure to calm. I turned toward the kitchen to put away my Bible, notebook, and pen, while my little guy bounced down the steps on his bottom, eager to put his arms around me.

Thankfully God convicted me quickly, and we made up in a hurry. I tried to backpedal my poor performance, but I felt bad then and still do today, more than forty years later. But motherhood doesn’t come with do-overs. I squandered the chance to plant a good seed and planted a weed instead.

SIDEBAR: WEED WISDOM

  • Weeds are a fact of life.
  • Pull weeds while they’re still small.
  • Weeds are stronger than tender plants.
  • Don’t mistake weeds for good plants.
  • Unpulled weeds will destroy a garden.

Sneak Peek #13

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Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

Disciplining children can be the most difficult part of parenting, and parents don’t automatically know how best to handle infractions without overdoing or underdoing. It’s tricky to hit it just right, since each child is different and each “crime scene” is unique.

That doesn’t let mothers off the hook, though. The Bible is replete with examples of what happens when children are left to discipline themselves before they’re old enough to know how. And Scripture gives plenty of info on how to do it right. The old idea, “Spare the rod and spoil the child” actually originates with God (Proverbs 22:15). But even after we’ve nodded in agreement, we often find ourselves in blurry situations.

Both of us have learned through our mistakes that the best way to discipline is to let natural consequences do it for you. I (Mary) remember my first experience with this and how well it worked. Julia was barely two years old, playing in the bathtub one day, when she repeatedly grabbed a bar of pink soap from the built-in soap dish. She badly wanted to take a bite, and I knew she needed to learn soap wasn’t for eating.

“No-no,” I said again and again, taking the soap from her and putting it back. “Yucky. We don’t eat soap.”

With typical toddler persistence, she continued to reach for it, and I knew I’d have to press my point. Either I’d have to remove the soap, despite my wanting it to stay there, or I’d have to slap her hand, which I was reluctant to do. Without one of the two, our soap battle would continue indefinitely—that is, until I realized I had one more option. I could let her eat the soap.

Leaning back, I watched her grab it, take a bite, make a face, and put it back. She never reached for it again. Done.

SIDEBAR:  WHEN YOUR CHILD PUSHES YOUR HOT BUTTON

  • Take a deep breath.
  • Refuse the urge to react.
  • Pray quickly.
  • Keep a calm demeanor.
  • Isolate your child.
  • Leave the room if you must.
  • Use natural consequences if you can.