Category Archives: Heaven

Love Without End, Part 2

Posted on by

Nate loved his stainless steel Rolex watch and got an uptick of pleasure whenever he checked the time. He wore it on his right wrist rather than the traditional left, but one day I noticed he wasn’t wearing it at all. When I asked why, he said, “It’s at Peacock’s, being cleaned.”

Several weeks after that, his wrist was still empty. When I asked about it again he said, “I have it, and its working fine. But I’ve been wondering if I should wear it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, these days it seems ostentatious,” he said.

Rolex watchI was surprised. He’d loved receiving it, wearing it, setting it on the dresser every night. Then why the change of heart? Since he’d started wearing it, much had happened in the real estate and legal worlds, and his thriving business had shriveled to nothing because of governmental law changes. The fact that his partner had suffered a debilitating stroke and never returned to work didn’t help. His rapidly rising income had plummeted, and we were scrimping at home. When Nate looked at the big picture, a Rolex seemed out of place.

Of course I was well acquainted with our over-the-cliff financial picture, but I hadn’t put all the pieces together. The radical changes affected all of us, but they were upsetting Nate the most. His business persona was being overhauled, his finances ruined, his work hours increased, and his tension level off the charts.

One night, I told him I was impressed with his decision about the Rolex. It had been thrilling to receive it and satisfying to wear it, but gradually he saw it as inappropriate, and I saw that as wisdom. Although Nate would not have said he’d been humbled by his losses, that’s how I saw it. And it was good… at least spiritually-speaking.

After the “fall” and a period of despondency, he joined a church small group, began sharing openly with other men, and related to the Sunday sermons in new ways. Although it was a painful reminder of our situation to eat soup for dinner every night for a while, Nate would say after it was all over that he was closer to the Lord and also to me.

Financial deficiencies never entirely disappeared, but Nate’s struggle ended completely on November 3, 2009, financially and in every other way. God had humbled him, and when he deemed the time was right, he lifted him up… way up… to a place where a Rolex or any other kind of watch is never needed.

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.” (1 Peter 5:6)

Names and Nicknames

Posted on by

As each one of our children was born, Nate and I established two guidelines for naming them: (1) to follow Swedish tradition, and (2) for their names to be uncommon. We named them Nelson, Lars, Linnea, Klaus, Hans, Louisa and Birgitta.

We knew we were taking a chance by using unusual names and hoped our offspring wouldn’t hate them, but of course as youngsters they wanted to share commonly used names so that when they were asked, no repetition would be necessary. But as we hoped, they grew into their names, eventually becoming thankful for them.

In a hospital scene repeated seven times, Nate and I did what all parents do; we studied each newborn face and finalized a name, a delightful process. Although we went into labor and delivery with a list of boy and girl favorites, it didn’t seem right to actually choose until we got a look at him or her. Then, almost always, the “right” name popped out of the list.

Part of those naming conversations would always be mulling over possible nicknames, exploring whether or not any of those might evolve into teasing. Now we know there isn’t a name anywhere without nickname potential, even for adults.

Midge-Pidge beach chairsSeveral years ago our younger girls gave Nate and I nicknames: Pidge and Midge (see beach chairs). I liked mine, but Nate wasn’t enamored with his. “Sounds a lot like pigeon,” he said. Mary and Bervin became Modge and Podge, and one of their daughters Morge. So we were Midge, Pidge, Modge, Podge, and Morge.

Names are important to God. Scripture says he wrote us into the Book of Life from before the world was even made. In his limitless foreknowledge, he knew what people like Nate and I would decide to name each of our children and already had those choices written down. Such a thought is mind-boggling and completely wonderful.

At some future date when God decides the world will end, he says we’re going to receive new names, each one known only to the person receiving it. (Revelation 2:17) This sounds mysterious, especially because when it happens, he’s going to write it on a white stone as he gives it to us. Maybe it’s these new names that are written in his book rather than the names we now have.

The bookIn any case, Jesus makes it clear, while teaching his followers, that even more important than a name itself is where it’s written down. Is it in his Book? If it is, it’ll stand strong as a reservation for residence in heaven.

“Do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.” (Luke 10:20)

Praising and Praying with Mary

  1. Pray for minimal nausea after chemo #10 tomorrow and an absence of other side effects.
  2. My second feeding tube is acting up just like the first one, prohibiting sleep. Pray we’ll get some help tomorrow while we’re there for chemo.
  3. I’m grateful for a full day at Moody Church today, and for the quiet of our “little nest” in the Chicago condo. Thank you for your prayers.

Good Night

Posted on by

Nate and I had the luxury of sleeping in a king size bed for four years. As we sixty-somethings age, we appreciate a good night’s sleep more and more, because it’s harder and harder to get.

Our king, purchased to celebrate our 60th birthdays, used to be in a downstairs bedroom and was available to more than just Nate and I. Volumes of girl-talk happened on that bed, as well as lounging amongst the giant pillows while watching TV. Sick kids spent their day in it, and Louisa slept there for a week after her painful tonsillectomy. Friends of our kids claimed it was “the world’s most comfy bed.”

BarracksA year after Nate died, the king got dismantled and moved from our cottage bedroom to the room next door, an Army-style bed-barracks decorated, coincidentally, in olive drab. Beds filled the floor space for group sleeping when crowds came to town, and the addition of a California king meant sleeping three more.

I went back to sleeping on our old double bed with its well-worn sheets, but once it was set up in my room where the king had been, it looked small.

“Set-back!” it shouted.

I thought, “If only I didn’t need sleep and could stay up all night, every night. Better yet, if only night wouldn’t come at all and the sun would never set…”

Right then God moved into that scene and comforted me with fresh thoughts: Nate isn’t using a bed in his new home and doesn’t miss either our king size or the double. So he gets to stay awake “around the clock” and never has to face a lonely night, because there’s no night there. All of that was good news to me, because it describes my future, too.

Heaven's LightI’m still bound by day and night, work and sleep. But after I die, after all of us die, we’ll be free of this cycle, one of unnumbered heavenly blessings. Nate didn’t sleep well most nights, although it might have been those 15 cups of coffee he drank each day. The fact that he’ll never face another night of tossing and turning is great joy for him.

But for the rest of us, nighttime can be riddled with problems: difficulty getting to sleep or staying that way, nightmares, fear of noises or break-ins, feelings of vulnerability, and the chronic dilemma of every daytime predicament growing greater during the night. When nighttime disappears, so will these problems.

I still don’t like nighttime without Nate, but the old double bed gives me a pretty good night’s sleep. And because Nate and I slept in it for 36 years, it feels familiar, like spending the night with an old friend again.

“Night will be no more. They will need no light of lamp or sun, for the Lord God will be their light.” (Revelation 22:5)