Category Archives: Learning from our past

In the Face of Suffering

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Most of today’s news reports included breaking details of the Boston bombings. One interview I heard featured a psychologist named Jeff Greenberg whose specialty is studying people who’ve been forced (by events) to face their own mortality. It might be a terminal disease or something like the 9/11 attacks… or the bombs at Monday’s Boston Marathon.

This morning he said, “When these things happen, it reminds you of the fragility of life, and that death is something that can happen very suddenly and unexpectedly.”

Boston Marathon bomb

He detailed specific, predictable thought patterns people have as they try to cope with what just happened. One of the first things everybody thinks is, “How vulnerable am I?” This goes for those in the Boston area as well as the rest of us who’ve been following them on national news.

Immediately after the question about vulnerability, Mr. Greenberg says we move into firm mental denial: “Most likely I’m safe.”

We might begin blanketing our heightened concerns with a new level of attempted control: locking our doors more carefully, driving with greater care, avoiding crowds, gathering supplies for emergencies. By putting safety measures in place, we’re trying to make sure nothing unexpected gets to us. We think, “Because I’m proactive, I’ll always be safe.”

In the light of day and with intelligent thought, however, we know this isn’t true. None of us are immune to adversity.

This morning I also heard the story of two brothers and their friend, a trio of pals waiting together near the marathon finish line. After the explosions, the brothers had each lost one leg, and their friend had lost both. Their anguish must have been crushing, and the agonies ahead for all three of them can’t even be estimated.

Yet as the newscaster reported, once these young men were in the hospital, they were far more concerned about the welfare of each other than themselves. During the weeks and months to come, they’ll be cheering each other on while trying to share the burdens of their buddies, rejoicing together at every recovery milestone. Their futures will be different from their pasts, but the prognosis for all three is bright, partly because they have each other.

God wants to partner that same way with every person injured during the bombings. He offers himself as encourager, sustainer, leader, and friend. His desire is to “stick closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24) Not one of those injured on Monday needs to suffer through recovery alone after an offer like that.

Honoring the victimsJeff Greenberg described how people become newly sensitive to their belief systems whenever they “look death in the face.” Monday’s bombings are another reminder, he says, that death is coming, and there’s no way around it.

Because of that, isn’t this the perfect time to say yes to God?

“After you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.” (1 Peter 5:10)

As Good as New

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Back in 1974, Nate and I took out a loan to fix my faulty teeth. Having just had our first child with a second on the way, we fell far short of the extra thousands needed for 4 root canals, their accompanying crowns, and a bridge.

Great teeth

Nate was fortunate to have inherited a good set of choppers, not even needing braces to straighten them. My teeth were a different story, a continual challenge with my first abscess and the related extraction while I was still in high school.

Our ‘70’s dentist was a good one, though, and his work lasted nearly 4 decades. As my new Michigan dentist said today, “You got your money’s worth.” I was visiting him to see what could be done about another split tooth whose crown had fallen off.

These days I seem to be in Dental Repair Phase #2, with a steady string of obligatory re-do’s. There is a silver lining to all this renovation, however. The last 4 decades have seen all kinds of developments in the dental industry, and as my dentist replaces yesterday’s old with today’s new, my teeth are gradually beginning to resemble Nate’s, morphing from greyish metal fillings and gold crowns to pearly whites that look like they’d never known a drill.

Maybe...

Back in 1974, I figured with all the work I needed that by my mid-60’s where I am now, I’d be sporting a full set of false teeth. But today my dentist assured me that won’t happen. And although my mouth is falling apart right now, by the time I hit 70 it may look and feel like the mouth in this picture.

Sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. Actually that seems to be the rule. For example, as a praying mom I’ve learned not to box God in by asking him to meet my expectations of how and when he will answer. I know he hears my requests and am sure he’ll work out the answers, but it never fails that things seem to get worse before they improve.

That used to frustrate me and make me wonder if there was a better way to ask for God’s help. But he reminded me of something that spoke to the dilemma: surgeons use scalpels to help patients heal. In other words, they have to cause new hurts to fix the old ones. Dentists work that way, too, and I think God brings the answers to our prayers similarly.

If that’s true, after we ask him to get involved and then watch in shock as things fall apart, we ought to inwardly be rejoicing, because at that point his “fix” can’t be far away.

As I left the dental office today, it wasn’t all bad news. They helped me sell my old crown to a gold-buying guy, who gave me just enough to take a friend to lunch.

“Though you, God, have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again. As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.” (Psalm 71:20)

Watching

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As Birgitta, Emerald, and I flew from Florida to Michigan on Monday, our 3 suitcases went a different route than we did. I glanced back after our curb-side check-in, just to be sure all 3 pieces of luggage made it to the conveyor belt, because we had high hopes of seeing them again at baggage claim.

They made it, and we did, too.

TSA note

Later that night when I opened my suitcase to unpack, I found a note left inside by the Transportation Security Administration (TSA). Apparently they’d taken the liberty of opening my bag and digging around inside for contraband, and they wanted to let me know that.

It said, “At the completion of the inspection, the contents were returned to your bag.” It’s a bit unsettling to picture a stranger pawing through my personal effects without my permission, but nobody asked.

Then again, nobody asks any of us if they can inspect us as we go through life, and many people are doing that. We’re all being watched by someone, parents by their children, teachers by their students, neighbors by other neighbors, clergy by church members, and even strangers by strangers. People are inspecting us, whether we give them permission or not.

But it goes the other way, too: each of us is watching others.

I remember as a young mom carefully observing women who were a bit ahead of me in their child rearing, watching carefully how they handled their babies. I had many questions, and seeing how they did things helped immensely. As I watched, I learned.

Jesus knew we’d have the need to watch the examples of others, so he saw to it that the Bible was written accordingly. Its pages are filled with stories of people he wants us to observe, hoping we’ll discern which ones we should emulate and which examples we should shun.

But people aren’t the only ones doing the watching. God is, too, not because he needs an example to follow but because he wants to help us. In other words, he’s watching over us much like a shepherd watches over his flock. For those of us being watched over, this is a priceless gift. He’s keeping track of us, is listening to our cries, and is surrounding us with his care. Our desire, then, ought to be wisdom-living that pleases him, which is the natural response to his loving watchfulness over us.

Suitcase content

TSA was watching me by inspecting my luggage, and thankfully they found nothing illegal inside. What they did find was a suitcase overflowing with stinky, dirty laundry: poopy baby outfits, dirty socks, spit-up-on bibs, used underwear, and the like. Maybe I should have left my own note for TSA:

“Inspect if you dare.”

“The eyes of the Lord watch over those who do right, and his ears are open to their prayers.” (1 Peter 3:12)