Bountiful Burdens

Posted on February 5, 2014 by Margaret

Here in southwest Michigan we received another exquisite blanket of snow last night, 6” more. We (along with our next-door-neighbor Bob) have cleared the driveway so many times it’s become a calisthenic event to “throw” shovels-full to the top of the piles.

Today while navigating the now-narrow roads of my subdivision, I noticed the evergreens were so heavily laden with snow their branches could no longer hold up. Some of them had been pressed all the way to the ground.

Many of us have felt much like those evergreens, bent beneath our loads. On any given morning it might even be difficult to roll out of bed and stand up, if we’re faced with a day overloaded by burdens. And when life’s storms come in multiples as snowstorms often do, each new layer feels like another 6” of heavy.

God tells us it’s not supposed to be that way, not when we’re partnered with him. He actually describes burdens and “easy” and “lightweight”, though he’s referring to his, not ours. (Matthew 11:30) He wants to convince us to roll our burdens over to him, and in the process, the things that formerly weighed us down will disappear. Then those same weights become feather-light to him.

Our only problem is the roll-over. Just like it’s strenuous to throw a shovel of heavy snow on a high pile, “tossing” our troubles to the Lord is hard work, too. They tend to stick to us like snow sticks to mittens on a good-packing day. We might try to release them, but just when we think we’ve done it and are waiting for that feeling of sweet relief, we discover we’ve taken them back.

The reason for handing them back and forth to God is that we aren’t completely sure he’s going to deal with them as effectively as we would. And surrendering our control goes against our natural, prideful instincts. Incredibly we’d rather stagger around under a heavy weight than let him take over.

But once we truly believe he’s better at burden-bearing than we are, the hand-off becomes easier and we can enjoy a freedom of movement like we’ve never known.

But lest we get flippant in our new, weightless reality, God gives us an additional reason why he’s eager to shoulder our burdens: so we can lift the loads of others. In Galatians he says, “Carry each others burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (6:2) As always, he is our example. He unburdens us so we can unburden others.

Today as I study the small evergreens in my yard, it seems doubtful they’ll ever recover. Not only have they been weighed down by winter’s storms, they’ve had additional shovel-fulls piled on top of them. But these old bushes have been through difficult winters many times before, and when spring finally arrives, I’m going to hope they’ll be standing tall.

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you.” (Psalm 55:22)

What’d ya say?

Posted on February 4, 2014 by Margaret

Fifteen month old Emerald learns a new word virtually every day now, and yesterday she came up with this one: “Gar!”

At first I didn’t know what she meant. When she said it, she was on the kitchen floor focusing on something very small, which turned out to be a rice-sized tidbit of paper. Using her petite thumb and finger, she managed to pick it up and held it high for me to see. “Gar!” she said, smiling broadly.

Though I wished I’d had an interpreter, she let me know what it meant by acting it out. Crawling to the cabinet door under the kitchen sink, she opened it, stood up, and dropped her smidgen of paper into the trash basket there. “Gar!” she said, and of course she meant “garbage.”

It’s an important benefit to any relationship if we can fully understand what a loved one is trying to tell us. But what happens if the words we hear aren’t an accurate representation of the opinion or feelings of the speaker?

Gary Chapman says part of why we misinterpret each other (which can cause arguments, hurt feelings, or confusion) is that different people “speak” in a variety of languages. He calls them love languages, and we hear best when the one communicating with us is “saying” it in our language.

Sadly, when someone tries to explain to us what they’re feeling, we often receive it differently than how they mean it, or at least differently than they think they’re saying it. When that happens, our conversation is headed for trouble.

Learning to be a good listener is tricky. First we have to want to be one, and a prerequisite for that is to willingly set aside our preconceived opinions about the subject at hand, while the other person is talking. This can be a monumental challenge and requires lots of practice. (Take it from someone who has frequently flunked this part.) If, however, we can accomplish that and then listen carefully, our original opinion about the person or their message will probably have changed, and improved communication will be the result.

Working hard to develop good listening and speaking skills has another benefit, too. It trains us to become better at our back-and-forth with God. Thankfully he always knows the perfect language to get through to us, and no matter how inept we might be at our conversational efforts in return, he interprets our heart’s intentions correctly 100% of the time.

Practice may not make us perfect, but it’ll get us closer. As for Emerald, later that same afternoon I followed her back into the kitchen where she was doing some practicing of her own. “Gar!” she said again. And I rounded the corner just in time to see her stuffing a clean dish towel into the trash. Smiling up at me she said, “Gar!”

Maybe the two of us still have room for some conversational improvement.

“If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” (Proverbs 18:13)

Joining the Dance

Posted on January 29, 2014 by Margaret

At 5½, Skylar Grace (my oldest grandchild) is forging ahead in the process of exploring new activities. She’s devotedly taking ballet classes and last week demonstrated some pretty smooth moves, naming them as she went: pirouette, arabesque, plie’, bow.

Though I haven’t seen any of her per- formances in person, I’ve watched videos and stills, and do get the drift of all she’s learned. She loves her teacher and is thrilled when it’s time to go to class. Last week I got to drive her there, and as we pulled up to the dance studio she said, “Don’t take me in, Midgee. I can go by myself.”

After she hopped out of the van in her pink outfit and slammed the car door I said, “You sure look cute in your tu-tu!”

Turning back to face me, she put her hand on her hip and said, “Midgee, this isn’t a tutu. It’s a leotard.” And off she went.

Skylar knows her ballet terminology and has been practicing her positions for many months. She’s beginning to evidence genuine grace, because she listens carefully in class and faithfully tries to emulate her teacher’s movements. But ballet is a complex discipline, and if she sticks with it, achy muscles and bloody toes will be part of her experience.

Very few of us are willing to put in the hours necessary to become good at ballet or anything else that’s an uphill climb to learn. We prefer instead to dabble, hoping for quick results, and when it doesn’t happen, we often drop out. Paying the obligatory price to become proficient (hard work over the long haul) quickly becomes distasteful.

Spiritually speaking we sometimes do the same thing, wanting to live blamelessly before God but only dabbling in the discipline it takes to get there. For instance, we might set a goal to memorize one Scripture verse each week but then skip the review process, expecting the words to “stick” anyway.

Or we promise we’ll be honest with God but then refuse to let him have control over one category of our lives. Or we commit to reading the Bible from cover to cover no matter how many years it takes but get bogged down in Leviticus and throw in the towel.

Our worst enemy, Satan, jumps in the way every time we move one step toward the Lord. He’s thoroughly evil, fighting us with invisible weapons we can’t stand up against… unless we use Scripture and prayer. But if we’re determined to work against his deceit by “following hard after God” (as Tozer would say), we’ll become strong in our faith and will still be standing at the end of his tests, maybe even up on our toes.

Maybe we should simply copy Skylar’s example in ballet class: listen carefully, follow the leader, and practice all the moves. And if we get “bloody toes” in the process, we shouldn’t let that stop us.