Category Archives: Life’s disappointments

In a Safe Place

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It’s not uncommon for me to put things away so well I can’t remember where they are. They aren’t lost, just hiding. The worst of it is that the more important the item, the harder it is to find.

More often than not, when I put these important items “away,” I’ll tell myself, “Take note. You’re putting this next to the computer paper in the hall closet.” Or, “Remember now. It’s in the far back right corner of your dresser drawer.” I take a good look, locking in the details and then walk away – forgetting.

Case in point: Last spring I was given a special key. It opened my church. I needed it for an evening ministry commitment when the church staff would be gone and the church locked. With my own key, I didn’t have to call for assistance but could open the door for our gathering, then lock it as we left.

The key found a safe spot on my car key ring, and it went along with me wherever I went. But then the time came to return the key. I removed it from the key ring and put it in a “safe place” to await my next trip to the church.

A few days later, when I looked for it, it was nowhere. I squeezed my eyes tight, trying to picture myself hiding it, coaxing my brain to think as I might have thought then. And then I started hunting. I moved every piece of furniture, swept thoroughly, emptied drawers and closet shelves. I prayed. I pleaded with God. I begged, crying out to him for help. As I talked to him, I knew he was looking right at that elusive key. Why wouldn’t he tell me where it was?

Days went by. Then weeks. I kept looking… to no avail.

When nine of my grandchildren came for a visit (the reason I had put the key in a safe place), I taped a five dollar bill to the computer screen and drew a picture of the missing key and it’s blue key fob. “Whoever finds it gets the money.” And oh how they searched! They were out under the bushes, and checking garbage bags, and searching through the car. But when those two weeks ended and they’d all gone home, the key was still at large.

Though I didn’t stop looking, I began writing a speech in my mind, a tail-between-the-legs apology to the pastor for having lost the church key.

But then…

“Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath! (Psalm 116:2 NLT)

 

Best and Worst

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It’s been a year of non-blogging for me, since other things have taken precedence. Although much of 2020 offered up negatives, our family can also report a big 2020-positive. My 15th grandchild, Elias, was born.

This little guy arrived before his due date—well before. At 7 weeks premature, he was expected to need lots of assistance from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, but he surprised us all. Though he weighed only 4 pounds 3 ounces, he was in great condition and hung around the hospital for just 18 days.

The nurses were impressed with his fast progress, marveling that he never even needed oxygen. Now, three months later, his development is right on schedule, evidenced by his crinkly-eye smiles and lots of direct eye contact.

His diligent parents, Louisa and Teddy, are delighting in this wondrous 2020-positive.

 

 

 

No year, however, is without its negatives, and 2020 delivered a big one to our family. My brother Tom and his wife Leslie were both killed in their own home by an intruder, a shock from which all of us are still trying to recover. The mystery remains unsolved, and our hearts are broken.

On Friday, a new calendar year begins—day #1, week #1, month #1. None of us knows what will happen on the 364 days that will follow, though we’ll probably try to guess. But as my mother used to say, “God only knows, and he won’t tell.”

So how can we move into the new year with confidence when so much is uncertain? There’s only one way—to believe that our omniscient God will tell us everything we need to know, when we need to know it. And all of it, what we’re surmising and what actually occurs, will be coupled with his promise that he’s got the whole world in his hands. That means we as his children have nothing to fear.

As hard as it is for us not to know what’s ahead, we should remember that in every year, there will be negatives but also positives. Our best bet, then, is to simply trust God, leaning on his power and wisdom instead of our own.

“Do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.” (Hebrews 10:35-36)

Sneak Peek #25

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Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

How well I recall the morning I got an “F” in mothering. Still in my pajamas, I had gathered my Bible, notebook, pen, and mug of coffee. Tiptoeing past the stairs toward the living room, eager to eat a spiritual breakfast, I glanced up to see our toddler sitting on the top step . . . already! When he saw me come around the corner, his face lit up, and he greeted me in his usual cheery fashion. “Mama!”

In a split second my face fell, going from neutral to angry, exactly as our eyes met. Thinking only of myself, I let out a low moan. This child had robbed me of something valuable. My treasure had been blown out of the room by the cold wind of an interruption I was having trouble accepting. And there the two of us froze, a chasm of disconnect between us.

“Why are you out of bed so early?” I said with irritation, knowing this was a question no toddler could answer. Still caught up with my own agenda, it took a minute for my displeasure to calm. I turned toward the kitchen to put away my Bible, notebook, and pen, while my little guy bounced down the steps on his bottom, eager to put his arms around me.

Thankfully God convicted me quickly, and we made up in a hurry. I tried to backpedal my poor performance, but I felt bad then and still do today, more than forty years later. But motherhood doesn’t come with do-overs. I squandered the chance to plant a good seed and planted a weed instead.

SIDEBAR: WEED WISDOM

  • Weeds are a fact of life.
  • Pull weeds while they’re still small.
  • Weeds are stronger than tender plants.
  • Don’t mistake weeds for good plants.
  • Unpulled weeds will destroy a garden.