Category Archives: Life’s disappointments

God’s Waiting Room

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Life is full of waiting. We wait for paperwork to arrive in the mail, investments to grow, and phone calls to come. We wait for our kids to graduate, our incomes to go up, and the scale to go down. We wait in government offices, theater lobbies, bus stops, and airports.

None of us are any good at waiting. We want results, and we want them yesterday. With the whole world on fast-forward, it irritates us to have to push the pause button, especially when anxiety is running high.

WaitingThe waiting rooms of doctors’ offices might just as accurately be called “anxiety rooms.” As a person waits, she may have an open magazine on her lap, but her mind is far away, pondering the what-ifs. Whether we’re upset about new symptoms, waiting for a specific diagnosis, or wondering what our treatment will be, the feeling is the same: apprehension.

I remember waiting to hear what was physically wrong with Nate, wondering if our lives might radically change with what we would be told. Mary had to wait, too, through 6 long months of chemo and the scans that followed, to find out what was happening inside her body.

Tomorrow Mary, Bervin, and Luke will move into yet another waiting room as they meet with Mary’s oncologist to discuss any remaining options available to her. And as a result of whatever they’ll learn, in a sense she’ll be waiting again.

I have a friend who also had cancer and suffered through lots of nervous waiting. Asking for prayer as she awaited information, she sent a group email that included an interesting choice of words: “I’m in God’s waiting room.”

The minute I read that I knew she was going to rise above her circumstances, because she had lined up with God’s sovereignty over her life, even a life involving cancer. Mary has done the same, and Nate did, too. No fidgeting while waiting, no “why me,” no “how could you!” and no anger. Sure, all of them had questions and struggled with nervousness, but they fixed their gaze on their all-wise heavenly Father as they waited.

God's waiting roomWhile the world’s waiting rooms are marked by angst and dread, God’s waiting room has divine purposes for each occupant. Instead of magazines to read, he offers security. Instead of stale coffee, he hands out contentment. Instead of frayed nerves, he provides peace.

When we learn of cancer, life comes to a screeching halt, but God never stands still. He continues to energetically put a plan in motion that will eventually pour considerable blessing into people, even those with cancer, and especially those who commit to obedient stays in his waiting room.

“Since the world began, no ear has heard, and no eye has seen a God like you, who works for those who wait for him!” (Isaiah 64:4)

Praising and Praying with Mary

  1. Pray for clarity and wisdom tomorrow in the 2:00 meeting with the oncologist (and the wait beforehand).
  2. I praise God for a delightful day spent with my two siblings, Tom and Margaret. […tomorrow’s blog]

 

Overloaded

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Not too long ago I was waiting at a light when a spectacular semi-truck turned in front of me. It had more tires than I’d ever seen on one vehicle, all doubles, 4 to an axle except on the cab. As it drove past, I counted: 36 wheels.

Big heavy load.All I could think of was how difficult it must be to keep that many tires in good shape simultaneously. Are they wearing properly and balanced correctly? Are their lug nuts snug? Rotating those tires must be a nightmare similar to playing Mancala with game pieces too heavy to move.

Why so many wheels?  The answer: tons of weight inside.

It made me think of all the excess weight we carry, not in pounds but in burdens. Trouble comes when we try to carry too much on only 2 wheels.

In the book of Exodus we read how Moses tried to lead a million obstreperous people through miserable circumstances. He was doing the best he could, but it wasn’t good enough. He didn’t have enough wheels to hold up his heavy load, and it was ruining him.

God saw the problem and brought Moses’ father-in-law, Jethro, to the massive Israelite camp at exactly the right time. In learning how burdened Moses was he said, “The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” (Exodus 18:18)

The heavy weight was redistributed to helper-judges, which then gave Moses the 36 wheels he needed to continue moving the massive group forward.

Moses leadingYears later he again found himself weighed down by the impossible burden of his role. The people were crushing him with their complaints, so once again he went to God. “I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me.” (Numbers 11:14) It was time for a new set of tires. God provided them again in the form of many able helpers, and Moses’ load was lifted.

What about our 21st century loads? More often than not we drag under our heavy burdens while trying to give the impression we’re living feather-light. When others see us bent beneath our loads and ask if they can help, we say, ”No thanks. I’m just fine.” After all, we don’t want to add to their loads. But as we learn in Scripture, if we accept the help of others, a blessing comes to them as well as to us.

Moses modeled what to do when we’re overloaded. Step 1: ask God to lighten it up. Step 2: listen for how. We’re to avoid the extremes of either asking no one, or asking many of the wrong ones, because our best burden-lifter will always be God.

“Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.” (Psalm 68:19)

Praising and Praying with Mary

Thanks and praise for peaceful sleeping at night, a direct answer to your prayers. Please pray for my increasing fatigue, that God will give rest and rejuvenation to match the need.

Still There

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Mary’s original cancer diagnosis took place the day after Valentine’s Day, February 15, 2014. Almost immediately she and Bervin began testifying to God’s ongoing work within the situation and their awareness of his constant presence with them.

Ten days and lots of tests later, Mary, Bervin, and several of their adult children met with a team of doctors to get their recommendations. It was going to be a difficult meeting at best as a handful of highly-reputed doctors explained what was happening inside Mary’s body, along with what they felt should be done about it. Whatever was said in that room would shape the weeks and months ahead.

PeacefulAmazingly, Mary wasn’t at all nervous. That’s because she knew that literally thousands of people (including strangers) were praying for God’s peace to envelop her, confident he was hearing and would deliver.

When the meeting began, with each doctor taking a turn, a remarkable drama unfolded. As Mary told it, “I’ve always been on the praying end of a crisis, but this time I was the one being prayed for. The presence of God’s Spirit in that conference room was palpable. I saw it in the behavior of the doctors and in the faces of my children.”

She went on to say, “In my 70 years, I’ve never felt the strong, literal presence of the Lord that powerfully.”

Some people feel that since we can’t see the spirit world, we can’t be sure it exists, but Mary testified otherwise. During that meeting she became aware of God’s presence in the room. “He was moving among us, and it was very real as he worked to accomplish answers to those many requests.”

She said that as she listened to the doctors, she was completely enveloped in a bubble of peace. Because of the nature of the meeting, experiencing such tranquility was completely unnatural. Surely it was God’s supernatural gift.

Absence of stressThe Lord isn’t stingy with this kind of unusual peace. He offers it to anyone who wants it, in any set of circumstances. He says, “Ask me, and then trust me to deliver it.” We don’t even need a life-and-death crisis for him to wrap us in that same unlikely peace.

Today Mary is facing a new crisis even more severe than the first. But the same supernatural benefits she experienced 9 months ago are still available to her: God is still powerfully present, and he’s still willing to answer prayer requests for his mysterious supernatural peace, right in the middle of all the negatives. (See #2 below.)

Jesus said, “The Advocate, the Holy Spirit…. will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.” (John 14:26-27)

Praising and Praying with Mary

  1. I praise God for the good gifts he continues to give, like being able to cook dinner for our local adult kids tonight, which I love to do.
  2. Please pray that when I wake up during the night, negative thoughts about what’s ahead won’t keep me from getting back to sleep.