Category Archives: Marriage

Nelson’s journal 5/4/22  

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Nelson has always loved working on cars and trucks. When he was 16, he traded lawn care services to a man who offered to pay him by giving him an old run-down Jeep C-5 that wasn’t working. Nelson was thrilled and worked on it in every free minute. It wasn’t long before he was running around town in it.

In Hawaii, he’d done something similar, finding an old pickup that didn’t work and striking a deal with the owner to buy it—for $700. There was no bed in it, and it lacked many other things too, but Nelson was thrilled to once again be working on a vehicle in his spare time.

Once he got it going, he decided to paint it bright blue. I happened to be out in Hawaii then, anticipating the baby’s birth, and the two of us had fun painting it together.

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May 4, 2022 

Sitting here with Baby Will getting ready for a Skype call. Annso sleeps. She does all the heavy lifting at night, which I’m super grateful for. I’ve been feeling better each day with my rack of drugs, Elvis-style, to get this Thyroid thing under control.

Really thankful for the free health care we have here in Hawaii. Sometimes feel like we are too well-off to have it, but the cost of living is super high here, and God knows I’ve paid my share of taxes over the years. When it works out in your favor once in a while, you might as well take it with a happy heart. That’s the way I see it now.

Sold the Robin Egg Blue truck today. Now we have a few more bucks for our Summer RV. Actually got $3000 for it. I was beginning to wonder if I’d get my money out of it and break even, but God is super nice to me and sent me a nice guy who bought it.

Also, today I found out that I don’t have Graves disease, more than likely, according to the number in my blood work taken by the Doc in HNL [Honolulu]. He said I have some sort of release of hormone caused by an auto immune failure or something. He called it  Thyroiditis.

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“God is able to make all grace abound to you…” (2 Cor. 9:8)

Nelson’s journal 4/5/22

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Nelson’s baby Will is only three weeks old, but already he has brought some new and interesting challenges to his parents. Nelson gets up during the night along with Ann Sophie, cheering her on and sharing in the hard parts of trying to settle him when he’s crying for unknown reasons.

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April 5, 2022 

Thank you, Lord, that Will finally went to sleep. And with an empty stomach. He gets overtired and hard to settle. It’s a cycle that repeats itself. Raising a kid is pretty hard. Stretches you in lots of ways. I would say the hardest thing is having a problem without solutions.

A crying baby who is upset but has a clean diaper, a full belly, and no known reason to be upset. Won’t sleep, won’t settle, whether he’s held or left alone. We read books, pray, and do the best we can. I hesitate to even pray anymore because it seems when I do pray, the thing I’m asking for definitely doesn’t happen.

Does God answer prayers like, “Please help this baby to drink something,” ? I don’t know, but no one said it would be easy. We are thankful for him and he’s lovely when he’s chill, but that’s not very often. At least not for me.

Annso seems to have stretches during the day when he’s a little angel, but when I show up, he’s jacked up. Maybe he can sense the inner motor I have running and goes off that a little. Overall, we are loving it. The best part of the whole thing is Annso. She’s an angel and makes everything just a little bit better.

The church handoff is pretty much in stone. I’m so relieved about it. I have one more sermon this next week, then Bob Duffer will do the last one which falls on Easter Sunday. We did good. 6 years, at least 5 that Annso was with me. She stood with me the whole time and had more enthusiasm and optimism than I ever did.

Thank you Lord for giving me all these amazing blessings and I hope to be worthy of them, the adversity too.

Came back from HNL [Honolulu] yesterday after an appointment with the Endocrinologist, of which I didn’t know there even was such a thing. Apparently, lots of people have thyroid issues. Hopefully he can resolve mine for me. Pills, tests, levels, etc. No talk of changing diet, which I’m thankful for.

I go into those places assuming they will say to eliminate the things I love to eat and drink, but thankfully, he didn’t. Thank you Lord for Little Will, thank you for the staff team we have here now and for the relatively low key Kokua Crew gang who is here. Thank you for Ally who helps Annso through this time and takes her job. Thank you that you have a plan for the Summer when we hope to leave. I am grateful you give us time together and time off.

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“For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted the desires of my heart.” (1 Samuel 1:27)

Nelson’s journal 4/4/22  

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Nelson’s constant coughing and skewed blood numbers have led doctors to pursue the possibility of thyroid disease: thyroiditis. There’s no endocrinologist on The Big Island where they live, so they’ve been waiting in line to see the one endocrinologist in Honolulu, on the island of Oahu. So island-hopping is the order of the day.

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April 4, 2022 

Today, I’ll fly to Honolulu, because an endocrinologist appointment opened up for me to get my thyroid looked at. It’s nice to have something different to do, but I don’t love leaving Annso and little Will alone. She’s more than capable, but it’s nice to be together. Good thing it’s just an over-and-back and no quarantine garbage to deal with. Thank you, Lord, for that.

We had a staff meeting in common room 5 just a few minutes ago with the 8 extenders, John, and I. They are good folks. I called the meeting to help Annso and I phase out of a few night-and-weekend things. When you’re single, you have the time, but now, time is just too valuable to sit in a meeting or at a small group for a whole evening, when you could be at home with your family.

Going to Honolulu is a trip, literally. I look forward to it only until I get there. The novelty of going to Starbucks and walking Waikiki or Ala Moana Mall have long since disappeared for me. Rob and I used to smoke and talk for hours on the benches outside the Animal Pit Starbucks.

We would talk about questions that are answered now, about women. Would we remarry? Where would we settle? And now we know those things. We were overage adolescents who became men, to some extent, and now we have families of our own. Those talks seem like ages ago now, 12 years actually, but they added up to this, which is great. I wouldn’t trade the life I have today for anything.

Sometimes a fleeting feeling comes across my brain if I hear a part of a Guns N Roses song, and the feeling is there—that nostalgic, “nothing can happen” feeling. The feeling of being young forever moves across for a fleeting second. But everything beyond that is just chasing after that first feeling, just as they say it’s like with the crack pipe. You never get that again, but the obsession is chased and sacrificed for, nonetheless.

After returning from Honolulu:

On the flight back, I read more in A Man’s Search For Meaning, and one of its main things is that when a person suffers, no matter how much he is pressed, as long as he decides to be brave, dignified, and unselfish, these cannot be taken from him, and therefore, freedom itself, cannot be stolen.

Suffering can be used, and the way a person handles it can be seen as useful, and therefore meaningful. And if a man sees his existence as meaningful, he keeps the will to live, despite terrible suffering that would take it from him. No one can take a person’s will to suffer meaningfully, unless they give it up on their own.

On a more down to earth note, Will just screams and screams. Apparently, while I was gone, things were great and he was sleeping every 3 hours like clockwork, but now that I’m back, he won’t sleep or eat. He’s a wreck. I think we should let him cry it out longer, but Annso goes in after 5 minutes. Who knows why things like this happen, and hazarding a guess is probably futile. The important thing is that we are unified, and that means I give in right now, and we do it her way.

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“Comfort one another. Agree with one another. Live in peace.” (2 Corinthians 13:11)