Category Archives: Parenting

Sneak Peek #26

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Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

We learn from Scripture what patient parental teaching looks like. In Genesis 2, the Lord lets Adam, the first human being, name all the animals God had formed from the ground. These animals belonged to God. He shaped them and established their characteristics, and certainly He could have named them Himself, probably with more creativity than Adam used. But He let Adam “help” with this important task.

Verse 19 says, “He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name.” God didn’t make suggestions during the process or redo any of the names when Adam was finished. He didn’t interfere in any way. Instead He gave Adam complete freedom to do the job in whatever way he chose. And afterward, He let it stand.

This challenges today’s mothers to let their children participate in important jobs. They should give them the freedom to do it the way they believe is best, even if that way might turn out poorly. In the end, the greater value might not have been in the task accomplished but in the lessons learned along the way.

Have you ever wondered how long it took for Adam to give unique names to “all the livestock, the birds in the sky, and all the wild animals” (Genesis 2:20)? God’s patience is a wonderful model for mothers as they teach their children. The Creator had several important things for Adam to learn when He invited him to name the animals, just as you have multiple things for your children to learn in any given life experience. Patient waiting is always one of the hallmarks of a good teacher.

SIDEBAR: CHARACTER TRAITS TO ENCOURAGE

  • Honesty
  • Kindness
  • Cheerfulness
  • Cooperation
  • Sharing
  • Patience
  • Generosity

Sneak Peek #25

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Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

How well I recall the morning I got an “F” in mothering. Still in my pajamas, I had gathered my Bible, notebook, pen, and mug of coffee. Tiptoeing past the stairs toward the living room, eager to eat a spiritual breakfast, I glanced up to see our toddler sitting on the top step . . . already! When he saw me come around the corner, his face lit up, and he greeted me in his usual cheery fashion. “Mama!”

In a split second my face fell, going from neutral to angry, exactly as our eyes met. Thinking only of myself, I let out a low moan. This child had robbed me of something valuable. My treasure had been blown out of the room by the cold wind of an interruption I was having trouble accepting. And there the two of us froze, a chasm of disconnect between us.

“Why are you out of bed so early?” I said with irritation, knowing this was a question no toddler could answer. Still caught up with my own agenda, it took a minute for my displeasure to calm. I turned toward the kitchen to put away my Bible, notebook, and pen, while my little guy bounced down the steps on his bottom, eager to put his arms around me.

Thankfully God convicted me quickly, and we made up in a hurry. I tried to backpedal my poor performance, but I felt bad then and still do today, more than forty years later. But motherhood doesn’t come with do-overs. I squandered the chance to plant a good seed and planted a weed instead.

SIDEBAR: WEED WISDOM

  • Weeds are a fact of life.
  • Pull weeds while they’re still small.
  • Weeds are stronger than tender plants.
  • Don’t mistake weeds for good plants.
  • Unpulled weeds will destroy a garden.

Sneak Peek #24

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Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

I (Mary) learned about eating issues with one-year-old Marta. As a baby, then a toddler, she was a picky eater to the max. She didn’t have an ounce of fat on her, because she refused to eat 90 percent of whatever I cooked. Though I tried every trick in the book to make food appealing to her, she just wouldn’t eat. Gut instinct told me it would be wrong to discipline her for lack of an appetite, especially since she was a sweet, compliant child in every other respect. But I didn’t know what to do.

Every Saturday morning I made Swedish pancakes for our family, and little Marta was willing to eat one of those. So I decided to make it my mission to produce Swedish pancakes every day of the week, just for her—breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Because she needed calories, I substituted cream for the milk and went heavy on the eggs. It didn’t bother me that she wanted to dip her pancakes into a puddle of syrup. Anything to get her to eat.

She ate pancakes every day during those many months, and eventually she began tasting other things too. Had I punished her for refusing to eat, I don’t believe it would have helped in any way. It certainly would have made her dread family mealtimes and probably would have damaged our relationship. Today Marta is a healthy twenty-six-year-old with a normal appetite. And though she eats virtually all foods, she has a special fondness for Swedish pancakes.

SIDEBAR:

HOW NOT TO HAVE WHINE WITH EVERY MEAL

  • Set attainable goals for meals.
  • Serve foods your child likes.
  • Dish up child-size portions.
  • Keep mealtimes short and sweet.
  • Encourage new foods without forcing.
  • Praise a willingness to try new foods.
  • Expect childlike behavior from your child.
  • Never allow a whiner to ruin mealtime.