Category Archives: Parenting

Sneak Peek #3

Posted on by

Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

I (Mary) was pregnant with Karl, who would be joining two siblings – three-year-old Luke and one-year-old Julia. Wanting to keep my skills fresh as a hospital nurse, I bought into the lie that a young mom can do it all. I figured the way to accomplish this was to work the night shift. After all, babies and toddlers still nap during the day, and I could catch up on sleep then.

But one person can’t do the work of two.

I’ll never forget one morning after working all night when I was nearly cross-eyed with fatigue. After my husband left for work, I came up with a plan to get some desperately needed sleep. I locked my two children and myself in our bedroom, figuring I could rest while they played. After all, there was nothing dangerous in the room.

How wrong I was.

Although I hadn’t planned to sleep, in just a minute I was out cold. It didn’t last long, though, as a loud crash, followed by the wails of Julia, woke me with a start. I found my baby lying on the floor bleeding from a gash on her cheek. Somehow she’d managed to pull over a portable wooden crib, which grazed her face on its way to the floor.

After the crisis had passed, I suffered terrible guilt. Every time I looked at Julia’s face, I was reminded of how foolish I’d been to think I could do it all. I failed at motherhood that day and learned a valuable lesson: no one can work all day and all night too. The day after Julia was injured I quit my nursing job.

Every young mother works hard every day, all day. And if your desire is to find success in mothering, you’ll have to repeatedly check your priorities. What’s at the top of the list for you? What follows that? How is your time being spent? And your limited energy?

SIDEBAR:

PRACTICAL WAYS TO REDUCE STRESS

  • Trim your commitments.
  • Pencil in some mommy time.
  • Resist feeling guilty for alone time.
  • Nap with your little ones.
  • Ask your husband to help.
  • Listen to worship music.
  • Go to bed earlier.
  • Enjoy a piece of chocolate.

Sneak Peek #2

Posted on by

Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE

I (Margaret) once watched a hurried mother brisk-walk across a big parking lot, her toddler in tow. The little guy’s legs were a blur as he tried to keep up with the big strides of his mommy, but he was failing. She seemed unaware of his struggle, and every few feet she gave him a yank and a hurry up, as if he was dawdling or resisting on purpose.

This little boy was doing his best, but it wasn’t long before she was tugging him so hard his feet literally left the pavement. This insensitive mother needed to acknowledge that her child wasn’t ready to do what she was asking.

And the solution would have been easy. She could have carried him, pushed him in a cart, or slowed her pace.

Little children need to be allowed to be little. Even Paul of the Bible spoke about this. He wrote, “When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things” (1 Corinthians 13:11 NLT). In other words, acting your age—even when it’s only one or two years old—is the way it’s supposed to be. When the time is right, life will insist that childish things be put away.

SIDEBAR: WHEN NOT TO PUSH IT

  • Is it beyond his ability?
  • Does she understand what your words are saying?
  • Is he exhausted?
  • Are you exhausted?
  • Are you reacting rather than acting?
  • Are you angry?
  • Is she getting sick?
  • Are you in a rush?
  • Can the battle be won?

Sneak Peek #1

Image

Excerpt from THRIVE AND SURVIVE, ZERO TO FIVE:

When I (Mary) was a new mom with only one child, Luke wanted to be my right-hand man in everything I did—just like all two-year-olds. My goal that day was to make a batch of pepparkakor cookies, a traditional Swedish favorite. The dough must be rolled thin before using cookie cutters to make shapes.

I planned to involve Luke by giving him his own ball of dough and hoped he’d be content with that while I got the cookies made. What I hadn’t counted on was that his attraction to the flour was greater than to the dough.

As I dusted the cookie cutters, he dusted his hands, face, hair, clothes, and everything within a ten-foot radius. My kitchen was quickly deteriorating, but I decided to let him do what he wanted and gave him his own scoop of flour. He poured and spread and patted his treasure until it had puffed itself wall-to-wall. But I got all my cookies baked, and Luke had thoroughly enjoyed himself.

Cleanup was significant, but picture in my photo album tells of a success. Luke’s big smile, shining through his floured face, says, “Mama and I had fun today!”

SIDEBAR:

BENEFITS OF HAVING FUN WITH CHILDREN

  • Builds strong relationships
  • Keeps mom young
  • Presents opportunities to teach
  • Provides release of stress
  • Brings shared laughter
  • Builds happy memories