Category Archives: Remembering

Newlywed Love (#79)

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July 19-25, 1970

Nate and I were happy to spend some weekend time washing and waxing our sleek, black Mustang with the terrible “bad breath” — hopeful that its handsome appearance would sell it quickly. It was enjoyable working together on a project that didn’t involve mental strain, since it seemed like all we ever did was study.

Mustang grill

I felt overloaded with student teaching, seminars, and homework, but once Nate got deep into his law classes, there was no comparison as to who was busiest. He won, hands down.

Mom's letterAfter we finished the car, I opened a long letter from Mom, thanking us for their time in Champaign. She also wrote about Mary and Bervin getting a dog, a Cocker Spaniel. Rusty and Baron were becoming friends, and Mom wrote two paragraphs describing their antics.

As I read the letter, a new thought came. Did they really want to keep Baron for us, or were they just doing it as a sacrificial favor? Were we taking advantage of them by asking them to keep him?

Mom wrote, The Baron is A-OK, tearing up a box right now in the basement here. He brightens our lives.

But I pictured Mom, on her hands and knees, cleaning up shredded cardboard… and I had my doubts. I knew she worried about Baron running off when they were outside and had no good answer for what they would do with him if they went on vacation.

And all of a sudden I began to cry. Nate came running and put his arms around me. “What’s the matter?”

Tuckered out Baron“I feel guilty that Mom and Dad have to keep our dog. They have to feed and house him, watch over him, and she just wrote that they took him in for his first round of puppy shots. We should be doing that.”

“Yes, but your mother really does love him – genuinely.”

“I know, but it isn’t just that.” And through tears I began remembering aloud all the ways my parents had helped us – going along with our rushed wedding plans, accepting Nate with enthusiasm, providing furniture, rugs, virtually everything in our apartment.

My familyThey had loaned us money, which moved my thoughts back to the cost of my college education… and so much more. I thought of my childhood as I grew up in an atmosphere of listening and love. Best of all, they had introduced me to Jesus Christ from the beginning, modeling lives committed to him.

As I sat with Mom’s letter in my lap and Nate’s arms around me, I sobbed and sobbed, overwhelmed with how much I’d been given and wondering if I had taken these gifts for granted. Did they know how much I appreciated everything? Had I thanked them enough?

Nate suggested I put all my thoughts into a long letter. “It’ll make you feel better to write it, and they’ll love receiving it.”

He was right, and I began. But even as I penned page after page of gratitude, my thoughts were on the Baron-dilemma.

“If you honor your father and mother, things will go well for you.” (Ephesians 6:3)

Newlywed Love (#78)

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July 17-18, 1970

By the end of the week, both Nate and I were ready for a break from studies. We invited Cathy and John over for 11:00 PM ice cream sundaes and talked into the night – because they came bringing bad news.

John.John’s draft number was getting close, which wouldn’t have been a problem with his law school deferment. But he very much wanted to quit school.

Worse than that, though, was the news that John might be going blind. They’d just learned this from an eye doctor and were still reeling. John hoped the Army would give him a 1-A deferment – after which he would quit school.

The whole conversation was depressing, and since neither Cathy nor John had any spiritual underpinnings, they felt hopeless. Our best encouragement didn’t seem to help.

When Nate and I fell into bed after 2:30 AM, we held each other close and voiced our hope that these good friends would be OK and that they’d one day connect with Jesus Christ… the Giver of hope. This was our first peer-experience with a major health crisis, and it felt awful.

Mom and Dad and fondue.Saturday was much brighter, because Mom and Dad were coming – and  bringing our beloved Baron! We prepared the fondue dinner they’d requested and when they walked in, we couldn’t believe how much Baron had grown in just two weeks. Nate kissed him right on the mouth!

Mom told us that several families had asked if Baron was available for adoption. His cooperative, friendly demeanor delighted many, so Mom asked our opinion. We said absolutely not, and wisely, that’s what she’d told the others.

Allerton PkNate and I spent the night on the Murphy bed, giving Mom and Dad our room, and on Saturday morning we satisfied another parental request – a visit to Allerton Park. They’d heard us rave about it but had never been there.

 

 

 

 

Nate and DadAt one point Dad said he wanted to talk to Nate, so those two went one direction while Mom and I chased after Baron.

The 3 of them left in late afternoon, headed for yet another commitment in the Chicago area. After we waved them off, I couldn’t wait to get the details on what Dad had  talked to Nate about.

It turned out to be our poisonous Mustang.

We had continued driving it through the summer, leaving the windows down to prevent headaches. But Dad was concerned since a cooler season was coming.

“If you can sell the Mustang for a reasonable price, we can put something together without too much trouble,” he said.  “I’d like to see you in a new car for a change. But it would have to be cheaper and smaller than the cars you’ve had.”

Model A-Dad believed used cars weren’t reliable and since buying his first vehicle (a Model A Ford in the 1920’s), he’d always bought new.

By Monday morning, Nate and I had put an ad in the local paper, knowing it would be illegal not to disclose the toxic nature of our car. We priced it realistically and were flying high at the prospect of new wheels!

But our thoughts were heavy, too… because of Cathy and John.

“Lord, you know the hopes of the helpless. Surely you will hear their cries and comfort them.” (Psalm 10:17)

Newlywed Love (#77)

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July 12-16, 1970

Nate and I were both very busy, me with student teaching and seminars, he with his paper route and preparing to start 5 summer school hours-worth of classes: Estate Planning and Poverty Law.

Since Nate was getting up at 3:30 AM to deliver papers, our paths didn’t cross until I returned from Danville in late afternoon. But often I’d come out of the bedroom in the morning to find a sweet note from my thoughtful husband.

One note during this week was written tongue-in-cheek:

Nate's noteDead seal time – I got the reading load for my courses and then dead seal! For Law and Poverty: 6 books, 300 pages of mimeos, plus reading necessary for a report (all in 5 weeks). Estate Planning – lots also. I can’t quit, because I know it’s good for me!

The two of us decided to start what we called a “self-improvement program.” Nate wasn’t sure when the Army would need him next and wanted to get in shape. He suggested I join him, “to do something together.”

When he asked how I felt about running, my mind went back to college PE class and the memory of sharp rib pain whenever we had to jog. “I’m not a fan,” I said.

Old running shoes“We could go at our own pace,” he said, “and you wouldn’t have to run any farther than you wanted to. Why don’t we just try it?” Unable to resist Nate’s gentle invitation, I agreed. The plan made sense, since both of us were doing lots of sitting during the day.

Rather than run around the neighborhood dodging cars and tripping up curbs, we decided to use the university armory building with its smooth indoor track.

On the first day, Nate ran one effortless loop after another, clocking 2 miles without much difficulty. I chugged and gasped to the 1 mile mark but hated every stride. “It’ll get easier,” he said, patting me on the back. “You did great for your first try!”

My feet were burning, my head was pounding, and that side pain was back full force. Wobble-walking to the car, I whispered to myself. “Give it one week. Then quit.”

Another note

Four days later, we were still running daily (at 7:00 AM when Nate came home from his paper route). But for me the highlight of our self-improvement program was when I could finally plop on the bench at the side of the track to watch Nate finish his run.

“While bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way.” (1 Timothy 4:8)