Category Archives: Submitting to God

Nelson’s Journal, 1/28/22

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Nelson continues his fast-paced work with YWAM where no two days are alike, while pondering what life would be like with a 9:00-5:00 job. Would he feel tied down? Would it mean putting permanent roots down in far-away Hawaii? Could he successfully become an electrician? Would this be the best for his family?

While searching for answers, he journaled a prayer, asking God what he should do.

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January 28, 2022

I am super grateful for what you, Lord, have brought us through last year. I read 2 books, the American Pilgrim and the Bitcoin Standard. Annso and I have the best marriage I could imagine. She has the best views on most things, and we think of one mind on many things.

She bought for me the book, The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. I listened to the podcast of it a while back, and there’s probably no book that could apply to me more. I am trying and seeing if a job for Tim [electrician] will work. Might be a step in the right direction.

Our time in Kokua Crew is coming to an end I feel. There is so much hurry and urgency, which is good for a season, but, like many things, it’s not meant to last a lifetime.

Lord, I pray you would show me the way today, the way to speak to Tim about the potential job, that I can really act and pray like it’s totally up to you and I don’t have a horse in the race. I only want what’s the best for my family and where you are leading.

Thank you for leading us so well up until this point. You know my desire to have a trade and something I am really good at, something with a certification that I really know and people are willing to pay me to do.

I’m starting to read the book Annso gave me, and it talks about a fork in the road, taking the one less traveled. He brings his core leadership into a room and says, “I resign.”

For me, with YWAM, with Kokua Crew, and grounds, it’s the right move. Not sure about working as an electrician, but it seems to be the right way… less spotlight, less meetings. Resignation sounds good, actually.

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“Be transformed…that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” (Romans 12:2)

Nelson’s Journal, Entry #5

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On this day one year ago, Nelson already had lung cancer but didn’t know it. He was happy, living in Kona, Hawaii, while working hard with Youth With A Mission and tending to his pastoring responsibilities. After a past that had included some dark periods, he was counting his blessings.

We know, looking back, that his darkest days were just around the corner. But a year ago, he was facing forward, with joy.

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January 23, 2022

Sunday night.

Jimmy preached. Annso and I took a van with six passengers. Good service. I led the prayer time.

You can live somewhere thinking you’ll leave any time, for whatever reason, then 20 years go by. That’s what this place feels like. I can’t believe Annso is even here with me. The fact that she walked away from her career to come and be with me still seems like a dream, but it’s real.

I don’t journal much because journaling is about reflecting and writing thoughts down, and this season is more about blowing and going and, to be honest, I’d rather me do that than sit around reflecting on everything all the time. I’ve spent more than my share of time doing that, especially since sobriety started in 2006. Hard to believe it’s been almost 16 years since I’ve been a drinker. Just amazing.

Tanner and I talked about the rapture tonight, and I don’t really even like to talk about that stuff. It’s all speculation anyway, and I feel like dying and being raptured are the same. We should always be prepared for either/or.

I swam a mile today, as I do a few times a week. Nothing like a blowout where you really feel tired at the end of it. No energy to worry or stress about anything.

I came back and worked on my Dodge truck. I am happy for this season. I don’t know how it could get much better, and part of me doesn’t want it to change. But still, I want to be led by God.

Lord, I pray you would lead us and help us to be in the right place at the right time with our little guy. Thank you for the bond we have together and how well we get along.

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“He satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things.” (Psalm 107:9)

Nelson’s Journal, Entry #4

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Most young couples who are expecting babies feel a combination of excitement and nerves. Nelson and Ann Sophie were getting close to their first child’s due date, wondering how it would be to become parents. How would it affect their full-time roles in Youth With A Mission? They were basically on call 24/7 while managing scores of young people from a variety of countries, along with their work assignments. And then there was Nelson’s pastorate.

How would a baby fit into all that?

Sometimes they were sure they’d have to leave their positions and their lives in Hawaii. At other times, they couldn’t see any other life. Should Nelson become an electrician in Hawaii? He’d been offered an apprenticeship. Or should they move to the mainland, near family, and do something else? Like what?

Nelson tried to puzzle it out through his journal.

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January 22, 2022

Been trying to find the new path for having a child and seeing what it means as we try it out. The countdown is on… about 6 weeks left, but people say he might come early. Maybe we can hit 2/22/22. That would be classic.

It’s good having Bates (brother Klaus) here. We took the gang to Makalewena while Annso and her gang of women went up to Mike and Teri’s place to have her baby shower. Where else could you rustle up 25 ladies to attend your baby shower? Only in YWAM. Even back home I doubt that that many people would come. I don’t think they even have baby showers in Germany.

It’s nice for her to be celebrated like that. Reminds me of Darlene’s words (wife of YWAM founder) that encouraged me to come back here in 2014. “Go where you are celebrated.” Not sure Jesus really preached that same thing, but it’s a nice sentiment that I see happen sometimes.

We have the best life here, and it seems weird to think about leaving, but with the vaccination craziness, it seems like it might have to happen at some point. Domestic travel vaccine mandate. That would do it. We’d be gone. Otherwise, I can’t see us leaving.

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“Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” (Proverbs 16:3)