Category Archives: Suffering

Party Hardy?

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A month ago I flew with other family members to the west coast for my nephew’s wedding. Although my children couldn’t all be with us, my sister and brother-in-law’s family of 20 was there in force to participate in 5 days of non-stop merry-making. At least one wedding-related festivity occurred each day, and other adventures were wedged in between: sightseeing, swimming, shopping, hiking, running, and lots of large-group dining.

When the night of the actual wedding finally arrived, some of us found our energy flagging, and the young set was especially pooped. Their naps and down times had been set aside in favor of family fun, and energy was dwindling. By the reception, they were dropping like flies.

The struggle to keep going can overwhelm any of us. When adults find their endurance fading, it’s usually a result of something far less exciting than wedding festivities. Exhaustion can come as a result of over-commitment, mismatched commitment, or commitment gone wrong. It arrives in our minds before it hits our bodies so that when it finally does take a physical toll, it can’t usually be corrected by a simple night’s sleep.

So what are we supposed to do when we hit the proverbial wall of I-can’t-go-on? In most cases we know we must, so where can we go for a good dose of staying power?

The answer is found in the Bible. It makes sense for us to ask the Someone who has an ample supply of stamina, resolve, and get-up-and-go. Though our resources to carry heavy loads have a definitive limit, God’s don’t. Scripture says he has “rich storehouses” of all things energetic.

In truth, no storehouse could hold all of God’s fortitude, but in that word picture he’s trying to impress on us that he’s got more than enough for you and me. Pulling our thoughts from our own shortfalls, he’s trying to focus us toward his abundance.

Most of our battles are won or lost in our heads, which then direct our bodies. It’s a good thing he designed us that way, since the majority of us would never have enough muscle-power, speed, or just-plain-zip to endure life’s challenges if they were only physical. So since our minds are the birthplace of a will to keep going, a sound strategy is to ask God to put it there. And it doesn’t even require going to the gym. As we request what we need, he makes us strong.

Our little people may not yet know how to claim scriptural promises for themselves, but God took care of that. He set them up so that a few minutes of zzz’s is all the rejuvenation they need to once again party hardy.

 

 

 

 

“I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit.  Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong.” (Ephesians 3:16-17)

 

Wounded Hearts

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Recently at the beach I came across a beautiful heart-shaped stone the size of a fifty-cent piece. As I brushed off the sand, I saw it wasn’t a keeper, because it had a hole all the way through it. I dropped it and stepped over it, but several paces later decided to go back and get it. Suddenly a holey heart seemed more realistic than a perfect heart-shaped rock, a reminder of the wounded hearts common to all of us.

Very few people are strangers to heartbreak. Whether it’s cruel criticism, a betrayed confidence, a personal rejection, or a piece of bad news, everybody gets wounded at one time or another. When Nate received the shock of stage 4 terminal cancer, both of us took a heart-stabbing. Then 42 days later when death snatched him away, a second wound came, at least for me.

Why does God allow us to feel deep heart-hurts? Couldn’t he emotionally anesthetize us, at least a little? A woman in childbirth can opt to be partially paralyzed (temporarily) through an epidural nerve block. She remains alert and participates in the birth, but most of her pain is eliminated. Couldn’t God allow us to experience a broken heart in a similar way, without the stabbing emotional pain that always accompanies it?

A friend of mine, Judy Allen, made an astute observation about all this. Because she’s always looking to “connect the dots to God,” she’s noticed something interesting. She said, “Sometimes the only way into a person’s heart is through a deep wound.”

God is no stranger to hard hearts. Again and again in the Old Testament he describes the children of Israel as having hardened their hearts toward him, and in the New Testament he repeatedly warns us not to harden our hearts for several good reasons:

Scripture says resistant hearts end up as ignorant ones, meaning that people who oppose God are asking for trouble, and usually they find it. He also says hard hearts find it difficult to understand what he wants to teach them. They’re closed off to his wisdom and devoid of spiritual understanding.

As a result, and because he loves us, he’ll step back and permit a deep heart-wounding, but it’s always and only to get a place of entry. Then after that, beneficial things begin to happen. Wounded hearts gradually change from tough to tender, from resistant to receptive, and best of all, from cold to affectionate… toward him. In that condition, a broken heart is ready for his supernatural mending.

I hope I never experience a spiritual heart of stone, but if I do, my holey heart-stone will be a ready reminder of what to do.

“Blessed is the one who always trembles before God, but whoever hardens their heart falls into trouble.” (Proverbs 28:14)

Link to Judy Allen’s blog: www.ConnectingDotsToGod.com

 

We want the details.

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Our Birgitta began drawing faces at age 3 and never stopped, so with all those years of practice, her portraits have become (I believe) quite good.

When she was little, though, she drew primitively like most children do. As her attention span lengthened and she focused on one piece of paper longer, she added more detail. This picture was drawn at age 4, and like all her creations, I loved asking her about it.

“Who’s this?” I said.

“It’s a girl. She’s thinking.”

“About what?”

“Cookies,” she said. “She loves cookies.”

“She has a pretty bow,” I said, noticing its three parts colored differently.

“For her curly hair.”

We talked about the elbow marks, the hairy eyebrows, the beautiful teeth, the dramatic makeup, and the curly bangs. I saw how she’d carefully colored the inside of her mouth red and put pupils in the eyes, nostrils on the nose.

Life’s important stuff is in the details. When we buy a new car, we want to know everything it can do. When we purchase a product at the grocery store, we flip it over to read its ingredients. When someone has a baby, we want the blow-by-blow of labor and delivery.

Our quest for detail is also true when we ponder the events of Good Friday, but God hasn’t told us everything we want to know. I’d like to know how much detail Jesus himself knew ahead of time about those last 48 hours.

When did he learn Judas was a traitor? Did he know it when he first chose him? What about the bogus trials he’d have to endure and the humiliation he would experience through the mocking of his captors? Did he know the extent of that ahead of time? Did he know his disciples would run when he needed them most? His words to Peter about betrayal hinted that he did.

Did he have an inkling of how brutal the Roman torture would be? And did he really believe his Father would turn away completely? Surely these details had all come clear by the time he was agonizing in the garden, face to the ground.

Tonight at our church we attempted to participate in some of the details of those last 48 hours as we walked The Stations of the Cross: tasting his salty tears, lifting his heavy cross, tearing fabric to represent his torn flesh. We think maybe if we knew more, we might be able to participate more in his suffering.

Though Scripture tells us much, a great deal is left unsaid. But just like the detail in Birgitta’s current drawings has become more complete (at left), I believe Jesus will one day let us know the particulars of his incredible sacrifice. It’ll happen when we’re living with him in paradise, and when we get the full knowledge of those last 48 hours, we’ll go flat on our faces before him, awed that he endured so much…

…for us.

“Grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time, but it has now been revealed through the appearing of our Savior, Christ Jesus, who has destroyed death and has brought life.” (2 Timothy 1:9,10)