Young Love (#71)

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PostcardWhen July 25 finally came, Nate and I both felt it had been the longest summer of our lives. But at last, his time at Ft. Riley was winding down, and the only thing in the way of our togetherness was his graduation ceremony. I didn’t get to see him beforehand, but as I climbed into the outdoor grandstand with hundreds of others, I knew I was within a couple of hours of throwing my arms around him and delivering some of the kisses I’d saved for this day.

Families had come from all over the country, and the festivities of the morning kicked off exactly on time. Seated in row upon row of wooden bleachers, we all watched the impressive parade of cadets as they marched past us. After weeks of practice, they knew how to walk in flawless formation, paying close attention to the rhythmic calls of their commanding officers.

Cadet parade.

The program included a fire-power demonstration and other visuals that showed us what cadet training had been like for these men. All of it was impressive, but the only thing on my mind was that moment when Nate and I would connect. As interesting as the ceremony was, I was ready to climb into his VW hatch-back, close the doors, and head north to our new life together. And somewhere out on that field of military humanity, I knew Nate was thinking the same thing.

When the men were finally set free, I saw Nate split from the others and break into a run, making a bee-line for his fiancé. Kisses and hugs began happening all around us, but the only thing we knew for sure was that ours were the very sweetest.

On the way homeI was extremely proud of Nate. He had successfully completed another section of the Reserve Officer Training Corps program, a course considered to be “one of the most demanding and successful leadership programs in the country.” And within the hour, we were on our way to a brand new life!

”If I give over my body to hardship… but do not have love, I gain nothing.” (1 Cor. 13:3)

Young Love (#70)

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As I was buying a bus ticket for my trip to Nate’s cadet graduation at Ft. Riley, he was sitting with pen and paper, contemplating his last letter to me before we would be together for good. He put a great deal of thought into his last written words and decided to detail what life would be like for me, once I became his wife.

As he let his mind wander into our future together, he wrote down a string of beautiful promises any young bride would find exhilarating. His letter is quoted in its entirety below. Please excuse one reference to “passionate physical love.” I considered leaving it out (since this is a G-rated blog) but that seemed wrong. After all, Nate was a hearty young man of 23, and he was just being honest.

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July 22, 1969 – Dearest Meg.

You wrote in your last letter that I complimented you frequently. I love to say sweet, good things about you, to you, because my love is a prism which receives the white light of your beauty, intelligence and spirituality, and resolves it into a million radiant shades of other virtues. My love made me cognizant of the superb qualities you have. I thank the Lord every day several times for you and the complete reciprocity of your love.

Nate's last letterI will always love, care for, protect, and guide you. I’ll be a strong shoulder to cry on and will help with pain, help to rejoice, to wait on you, bring you oranges for your breakfast in bed, make passionate physical love to you for your satisfaction and mine, buy you anniversary, birthday, Christmas presents, presents for all occasions and non-occasions, compliment you, praise you, read the Bible and secular books to you, play music, feed you grapes, carry you to bed, rub your back, bring you chocolate, make you hot cocoa, and bite your ears.

I’ll pray for you and with you, worship with you, attend prayer meeting with you. I’ll enjoy our relatives with you. I’ll help you with our babies in every way from holding your hands in parturition* to telling teenage daughters when they can date. I’ll be your man, lover, husband – unified in Christ with you.

Love, forever and ever, Nate

* the process of bringing forth young

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Greeting card, outsideGreeting card, insideNate’s letter, written with eloquence and thoughtfulness, was in sharp contrast to what I’d done. My “grand finale” had been to send 10 humorous greeting cards.

 

His sent one significant page, the result of serious reflection on what unconditional love for his future wife ought to look like. And he didn’t stop there.

As he wrote, he made a personal pledge to do all 33 of those things for/to/with me after we became husband and wife. He was a man who believed that marriage promises were to be kept, and he fully intended to follow through exactly as Scripture instructed in Numbers 30:2. “When a man makes a vow to the Lord or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.” (Numbers 30:2)

As I prepared to marry Nate, I had nowhere near the understanding of marriage that he had… nor the depth of commitment. But I would soon learn.

“Let us pursue what makes for… mutual upbuilding.” (Romans 14:19)

Young Love (#69)

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In 1969, greeting card companies came out with a line of tall, narrow contemporary cards focused on soldiers, military life, and the loved ones at home. Each card cost 25 cents, much pricier than plain paper, so Nate and I didn’t often send them to each other.

But in one last blast of letters to hit the “Nyman mail call” at Ft. Riley, I sent 10 contemporary cards, writing my personal messages on the backs and sometimes all around the drawings inside. I wanted Company B to know that Cadet Nyman was loved a whole lot!

10 letters

Soon Nate and I would be communicating face-to-face, and though I was overjoyed at the prospect, I felt a twinge of sadness at discontinuing the back-and-forth written record of our romance. Writing to each other had been a special joy during this unique season of our relationship.

July 22, 1969 – Dearest Meg, Fiancée, future Wife, Lover, Mother. I have prayed about the upcoming year in law school, your teaching there, and for all the wedding arrangements we’ll make in August. Worry and frustration are signs of the carnal man. Having both prayed about our problems, we shouldn’t worry. I don’t feel upset about them after prayer. I know the Lord will take good care of us. I am praying about this every day.

Prayer

July 22, 1969 – Dear Nate. Our friends Carole and Reggie are on the way to my apartment as I write, to deliver my bridesmaid gown to wear in their wedding. It will be great to see them again! So that means you’ll be standing up in one wedding, and I’ll be in another – both in August. I’m wondering how we’re going to get all these days off from our counseling at the camp. The director isn’t going to be very happy about me asking for two additional days now, one for the rehearsal and one for the wedding. Well, as Doris Day sings, what will be will be.

July 21, 1969 – Dearest Meg. Tuesday night I am making a special prayer at about “lights out” time here, 10:00. Will you join me? Let’s pray at the same time about the same subjects, committing all our uncertainties to the Lord. Just 3 more days, Sweetheart. Get rested up and ready to receive an hour of hugs and kisses!

BusJuly 22, 1969 – Dear Nate. Tomorrow evening I’ll be climbing on a Greyhound bus to come to you! I’ve decided to arrive early on the day before your graduation to make sure I get there in case your commanding officer gives you extra off-base time at the last minute. I’ll be leaving Chicago on a 7:30 PM bus bound for St. Louis on July 23. In St. Louis I’ll transfer to another bus (4:30 AM, July 24), and from there will go directly to Manhattan, arriving at 10:00 AM that morning. If I can’t see you until Friday the 25th, don’t worry. I’ll be at the Holiday Inn and will be fine.

July 22, 1969 – Dearest Meg. Two more days! Hugging and kissing you will be my dream come true! I’ve made many new friends here at Ft. Riley and have determined that all servicemen need Christ. Though our suffering is little compared to His sacrifice, soldiers need faith in Him to preserve their sanity – and their place in eternity. A Christ-filled life enables a person to withstand great privation and hardship. And the Lord takes care of His own.

“I write to you, dear children, because you know the Father… I write to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God lives in you, and you have overcome…” (1 John 2:14)