Young Love (#24)

Posted on by

Poor Nate. We were an unmatched duo – “Ready” and “Reluctant.” He continued to say there was no rush for me to commit, but surely there were days when he could hardly cope for wondering if and when.

One reason I was dragging my feet was what I’d been taught as a child. My parents insisted that if my brother, sister, or I committed to doing something, we had to follow through to the end, no matter what. It’s a worthwhile principle, but as a result of it, the magnitude of a marriage commitment weighed heavily on me. How could a person be absolutely sure she was saying yes to the right one?

the-folksMar. 28, 1969 – Dear Nate. It was good to get a letter from you today… and to know your folks approve of what we’re planning next week. I must admit, I was very impressed with them when we met, that’s for sure! My ed class was dull tonight. My only salvation from sleep was sitting next to an open window. I’m praying hard about our situation and know the Lord will indicate concretely what He thinks of all we’re doing in our sincere attempt to follow His will. Love to you, Meg

 

Mar. 29, 1969 – Dearest Meg. I love you. Can’t wait till Monday! I’ll be at your apartment by 9 PM, after your evening class, and we can motor up to Wilmette from there. Thank you so very much for your prayers and encouragement. A beautiful and creative vixen can do a lot to see that a man always has the right attitude. Love, Nate

A journal summary of the week:

Nate arrived at my apartment exactly when he said, 9 PM on Monday evening of his spring break week. I was truly glad to see him! We stayed with Mom and Dad in Wilmette during the work week, and he studied through a tall stack of law books while I taught school.

Two of the five days, he accompanied me to work and threw himself into kindergarten activities. We lunched with my team teacher, and she reiterated her opinion that Nate would be a great husband. We attended mid-week prayer meeting at Moody Church, dined with my parents, hung out with Mary, Bervin, and several aunts, and had a groovy time.    

On Friday we drove to Nate’s home in western Illinois, and he gave me a tour of his old stomping grounds. It poured rain but was fun anyway. We spent the two evenings with his folks – nice people – and attended Easter service at his Lutheran church. That evening, Nate and I had a significant time of refreshing spiritual conversation, he and I with the Lord. It was wonderful. He was wonderful!

April 7, 1969 – Dearest Meg. I love you very much. Last week was fabulous, especially Easter Sunday. Letting Christ control my life through the Holy Spirit is the central thing in my life. Though my church background includes liturgy, any service is meaningful as long as it has the fundamentals: prayer, Scripture, hymns. If we let Christ have control, we can’t fail.

frustrationApril 9, 1969 – Dear Nate. There are always so many little things I want to tell you, and when I can’t have the time to write lengthy letters, I’m frustrated to NO END! This is just awful. I’m trying to do my wretched income taxes. Maybe I’ll bring them to Champaign this weekend for your able assistance. I’m also trying to figure out what I’ll wear to the Military Ball. And it’s not just the dress but matching shoes, gloves, and shawl or cape. I can’t wait to get on that Illinois Central train and be on my way!

“Whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please Him.”                   (2 Corinthians 5:9)

Young Love (#23)

Posted on by

As the days passed, I wrestled with my feelings, frustrated that I couldn’t fully commit to Nate. One of the problems was that I viewed love as having two levels: (1) loving someone just for the joy of it, and (2) loving someone enough to marry him… for better or for worse, and for keeps.

I knew I loved Nate (1), but marriage? That number (2) was a doozy of a decision. A week of days together was coming, though, and I hoped it would shake me loose from my emotional log-jam. I would have to work, but we’d be together parts of every day.

hmmmMar. 25, 1969 – Dear Nate. My team teacher says I should choose a mate based half on logic and half on love. She really likes you and says you are A+ in both. Actually, she told me she wished she was 20 years younger about now (wink).

Mar. 26, 1969 – Dearest Meg. I love you very much. This spring vacation will be great. Your parents and mine will get to know us and begin to think of us together as a couple. There is a great deal I want to show you in my home town, come the weekend. We’ll get to take long walks near your house and mine, and most important, spend time in prayer and worship. Easter sunrise service!

Mar. 26, 1969 – Dear Nate. My folks are glad about our arrangements to stay in Wilmette with them for part of your vacation week. Being together for 6-7 days straight will be a helpful thing in determining the direction of our relationship. My roommate has a boyfriend she loves, but it’s frustrating for her to wait and wonder when he’ll next call or ask her out. It makes me thankful that there’s no guessing with you. You are sure. You are unlike any other guy I’ve ever known… in so many ways.

Mar. 27, 1969 – Dearest Meg. I think of you constantly. When I think of the future, I realize that your personal decision, our parents’ feelings, and both of us being absolutely certain about marriage still present themselves. But you have plenty of time. I love you, and love waits. Whoever wins your heart will be fortunate and will have to work hard to merit you. My only doubt about our relationship is whether I am good enough for you.

letters-galoreMar. 27, 1969 – Dearest Meg. I got four letters today! Wow! I love you! Fantastic woman! Before studying for my ROTC test I had to write to thank you and comment on your essential goodness which deserves a life of kissing and hugging and admiration.

 

Mar. 27, 1969 – Dear Nate. When you come, I sure would love to see the movie “2001” before it’s gone. We could have a good discussion afterwards, since there are some poignant moral questions posed in the show, or so I hear. But we won’t have to spend too much money during the week if we don’t want to. There are lots of inexpensive things we can enjoy. I love you, Nate.

Mar. 27, 1969 – Dear Nate. Tonight I tried on several dresses that I can possibly wear to the military ball on April 12. My roommate let me borrow one, and I have 6 bridesmaids gowns. I should probably wear one of those, since they’ve only been worn once each. But it’s tempting to get something new.

Mar. 27, 1969 – Dearest Meg. Thank you for two new letters, warm and sparkling with Meg. I am hoping this coming week will be decisive for you. Of course you know I’ve already decided on you. But don’t feel you must rush a decision this week. You have all the time in the world. I can be patiently happy to wait for you. Last night it took me 2 hours of thinking about you before I could fall asleep, and I awoke thinking of you. I love you! And now lover-boy has to go put his towels and socks into the dryer.

“Put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” (Colossians 3:14)

Young Love (#22)

Posted on by

After I signed off with my church guy-friend, a sense of sadness set in. I looked back fondly over 7 years of dating and felt a sharp sense of loss. Now that I was closing in on an all-out commitment to Nate, I knew that playing the dating game would have to be a thing of the past. And I wasn’t at all sure I wanted it to end.

In quiet moments I began reminiscing about the fun I’d had with dozens of wonderful guys over the years, enjoying the pursuit and the catch as much as the dates themselves. Although I believed I was gradually falling in love with Nate, the idea of marriage sounded too serious too soon. My letters to him did continue to be affirming, but it was almost like I was preaching to myself: “Grow up, Margaret! Saying yes to one wonderful person means saying no to many others. It’ll be OK.”

chocolate-bunnyMar. 23, 1969 – Dear Nate. You are so patient, considerate, and kind to me. I’m glad I’m getting to know the “real you” more and more. This past weekend was beautiful. Time spent with you is always well-planned. Thank you for the things we did, for the meal with your parents, and for the Fannie May chocolate bunny! My 3 roommates and I just finished him off.

Mar. 23, 1969 – Dearest Meg. The weekend was great! My parents really loved you. “A very sweet and pretty girl,” they said. They think we’re “a nice-looking couple” and are eager for your visit to their house during spring break. Thank you for staying over Saturday night. Without that we would have had no privacy for prayer and other activity. You’re so sweet when you’re tired and sleepy. I’ll call you about our spring break plans, probably at the usual erratic hour. My apologies to you and your roomies, whoever I may awaken.

george-sweetingMar. 24, 1969 – Dear Nate. Pastor Sweeting was excellent this week. He said we can’t be successful in life without following the steps God has in mind for us. Either extreme — being fearful or having too much self-confidence —  can make us stray from His way. You and I need to be careful in making any plans, not to fool ourselves. We want to be successful in our relationship, and I hope everything will work out well.

Mar. 24, 1969 – Dearest Meg. It’s gray and rainy here, which makes excellent dreaming weather. I sit in class, Evidence in Constitutional Law, but the subject is: Johnson, Meg. She occupies my thoughts while I’m awake and my dreams as I sleep. Meg, I love you.

Mar. 24, 1969 – Dear Nate. Two letters from you today, both good ones. I appreciate it when you pen your thoughts as they flow naturally out of you, whether deep or casual. Thank you for your honesty. I’m trying to be honest in return. I’m looking forward to the end of this evening ed course I’m taking, but have made lots of friends in this class. We’ve bonded by thinking the whole course is rinky-dink, a waste of 3 hours two evenings a week. We’re all there only to fulfill requirements for the state.

Mar. 25, 1969 – Dearest Meg. Talking to you on the phone yesterday was a fabulous treat! It made the whole day go better. I get more studying done after I’ve “spent time with” you. I’m eagerly looking forward to our week together, both at your folks’ home and mine. All the logistics will come together fine. Don’t worry.

“Love is kind,” (1 Corinthians 13:4)