Nelson is leaning hard into the Bible and has resolved a past struggle by reinterpreting a passage that used to condemn him but now means something different.

                                                  >>>>>>>>>>

September 30, 2022

(Hebrews 6:9-12)

“Even though we speak like this, dear friends, we are convinced of better things in your case—the things that have to do with salvation. God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.”

                                                ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This passage comes after one of the scariest passages in the Bible to me. I read it as a kid and couldn’t reconcile it with myself, but see things differently now. The part I had trouble with was this: “It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit, who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age and who have fallen away, to be brought back to repentance.” (Hebrews 6:4-5)

I thought I would go to hell no matter what, because I had known God, then sinned again. But if we read verse 9, it’s a far different story. “…we are convinced of better things in your case…” and then in verse 10. I love this one and it might even have been on the wall at Hale Ola:

“God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.” It seems like a warning against cooling off and getting lazy. “We do not want you to become lazy…”

It’s easy to forget why we are here on earth and what our REAL purpose is. Without some sort of trouble in our lives, we become just like our unsaved counterparts who care about houses and money and jobs and material success that all dies with us when our short life on earth is over.

How can we remember that? How can we stay HOT? I think we get it from adversity. I hate to say it, but this cancer might be nothing more than that. I think it’s very possible that I’m totally cancer free at some point, able to do almost the same things I did before.

My prayer if that’s the case, is that this struggle won’t be wasted on me. What a pity it is if all we do is grit our teeth and try to “get through this” so we can go back to the life of shopping and eating and drinking. I don’t want to become lazy either, Lord.

I pray that I can see this for what it is and not waste any of it. Help me to absorb it and change for the better. What are the lessons here? Contentment in difficult circumstances maybe. Total dependence on you, Lord, and others, when I have been so self-sufficient all my life.

Generosity, since we’ve been given so much money, especially at the beginning. Gratitude for everything you are doing and your strong presence. Making sure to share our testimony and help others, after it’s over.

We know people who have come through things like this, and they are putting themselves out there for us. Thank you for them. I pray we won’t forget what you’ve done for us, and that we can pass it on.

                                                        >>>>>>>>>>

“Let your good Spirit lead me on level ground.” (Psalm 143:10)

Nelson is feeling a little better, which is a huge encouragement for him.

                                    >>>>>>>>>>

September 30, 2022

Judy comes over today, which will be nice for Annso. She’s a much more social person than I am, so it’s good she can have friends stop by. Last night she went to small group, which was great for her.

We are getting a network of friends here who are willing to do anything for us to help us in our struggle. It was effortless. All we did was go to church. Thank you for all that, Lord. You sent us a doctor who invited me, and we went. We didn’t shop around or second-guess which church to go to. You led us right away.

Your strong hand, Lord, is so evident in the path here. I am as sure as anything about where we are. The why-part, not so much. Thank you for that, Lord. It’s such a wonderful thing when you lead clearly. Maybe you’re leading clearly all the time, and we just don’t see it. We are so primitive and without much faith, so you are probably much closer than we think.

It’s thrilling to get a house. It’s thrilling to be able to make it what we want it to be on the inside. Thank you for that. You are so kind to let us have the desires of our hearts and to do it in such creative ways. Who would have thought that we would get financing for a house and that it would be a triplex, and in a small town called Rochester, home to the Mayo clinic.

I’m so thankful that I don’t have nausea this morning, that I slept almost clear through the night, and didn’t sweat that much. Thank you that I didn’t need that much Tylenol and that the fevers are seeming to break a little. I don’t know if I could have handled that for 12 weeks straight. That’s pretty much all the way from now until Christmas.

Thank you Lord for having mercy on me. That first morning throwing up in the kitchen reminded me how chemo actually is. Thank you that it’s backed off a bit on the gnarly symptoms.

Thank you that Will slept good from the time Annso left last night until well into the night, so she could attend small group, and I didn’t get overwhelmed here with him. He’s been in one of those “Mom only” phases. I can’t help that much, which is ok for me but makes way more work for her. She’s a saint. She does so much, never complaining.

It’s still dark outside and the temps are getting into the high 30’s at night but still hitting the high 60’s during the day. The leaves are barely changing, which is what we’ve been waiting for. We love it in Rochester, aside from the sickness that brought us here.

I’m so thankful for all the doors you have kicked open for us, Lord. I mentioned the church. No struggle there. The apartment couldn’t be more perfect for the 6 months we’ve been here so far. The Honda Pilot you led us to and even the Civic for Ralph and Astrid.

I find that writing down the things you have done, Lord, opens my eyes to more things you have done, and your presence is easier to see. Gratitude. It’s a simple thing, but it’s strongly in the heart of a human to complain and grumble. I like the Hawaiian sticker I saw the other day. “Stay humble, no grumble,” or something like that.

(To be continued…)

                                       >>>>>>>>>>

“With the humble is wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2)

Nelson’s fevers are making him feel weak, but if the meds causing the fevers are working, then he’s all for them.

                                                            >>>>>>>>>>

September 29, 2022

I have a fever almost every day. I wonder if it will continue for months and months like this while I take these meds. I wrote a blog about it last night and the general consensus was that it was powerful. It was nice to hear the affirmation.

Linni [sister] even said I’m a good writer. I’m happy if it can benefit someone. These days are slow and hard. They make you into a man, that’s for sure. It’s hard. Simple but hard.

Not a lot to do or that I could even do if I had it to do. I work on securing our house, which is like a part time job with all the issues from the bank to verify everything. I’m thankful for the chance to own a house, even though we’re not there yet.

“Lord, with your hand you drove out the nations and planted our ancestors; you crushed the peoples and made our ancestors flourish. It was not by their sword that they won the land, nor did their arm bring them victory; it was your right hand, your arm, and the light of your face, for you loved them. You are my King and my God, who decrees victories for Jacob. Through you we push back our enemies; through your name we trample our foes. I put no trust in my bow, my sword does not bring me victory; but you give us victory over our enemies, you put our adversaries to shame. In God we make our boast all day long, and we will praise your name forever.” (Psalm 44:2-8)

I remember you, Lord, that you have done all the good things in my life and very little (if anything) I’ve done has amounted to much. I do a little of the following, but most of the time, I don’t even know where I’m going until I end up there and the whole plan unfolds and it becomes more obvious. And those are the really awesome ones.

You do more than all I ask or imagine, just like it says in Ephesians 3:20. I’m thankful for not having a fever right this minute, even though it could come on at anytime. I’m thankful for all the prayer for us and for Mom’s blog to put it out there.

Thank you for the writing skill you gave me to put my thoughts on paper like I can do. I’m grateful that I have Annso and Will sleeping in the other room and that you have given us this little family. Thank you for the love she has for me and how devoted she is.

I’m thankful that we seem to be getting the house and that we are able to remove the roadblocks they are putting up one by one. I pray for the continued ability to do that.

Thank you for your hand that’s so visible in everything from the places we live to the tenants in our house, to Annso’s parents being here and Mom coming when they are not. Thank you that we have almost always had someone here to help us without a break hardly at all.

I’m grateful Ken is close by and that so many people came to visit and show their love. I’m thankful that mostly that’s over now, and no one comes to visit, because it’s so taxing on me when people expect me to tell stories and share for hours.

                                                      >>>>>>>>>>

“Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way… Your God will come.” (Isaiah 35:3-4)