Love Without End, Part 3

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Nate loved his Rolex and learned that every other Rolex-wearer felt the same. I remember a moment when the two of us were sitting on an ice cold bleacher-bench in a local park, watching Little League baseball on a winter-like spring day. The lady on the other side of him was bragging loudly to her friend about her new Rolex watch, a gold version she said had cost thousands. I knew that was true, having had my own gold Rolex several years before.

As I listened to her, I was awash in regret for having carelessly lost my watch. “Lucky her,” I thought. “She’s still got hers.”

Then Nate leaned over and whispered, “That’s not a Rolex.”

“What?” I said, knowing her watch looked exactly like mine.

“It’s a knock-off,” he said.

“How can you tell?”

“The hands. Her second hand is jumping with each tick. On a real Rolex it sweeps.”

Rolex knock-offI was impressed he knew that, and suddenly unimpressed with the woman’s bragging. It’s possible her watch was a gift and she didn’t know she’d been given a fake (like this picture), but whatever the case, all the boasting in the world wasn’t going to change that counterfeit into the genuine article.

Apparently every designer product has a knock-off version these days. I could buy a $2000 “Prada” bag for only $155 or a pair of “Louboutin” high heels worth $2400 for $68. Of course just as Nate recognized the fake Rolex, a Prada or Louboutin fan could quickly pick out the imitation.

That got me thinking about people, especially those of us who claim to be Christians. We’ve all known church attendees who parroted the right spiritual lingo, i.e. wore the right label, but who didn’t live out the philosophy behind it. Truth be told, we’ve all done it now and then. But just as a child can sense when an adult doesn’t like him, non-Christians know when someone is a “knock-off believer” trying to fake faith.

Scripture indicates that God doesn’t think much of that, which forces me to examine the validity of my own faith. Am I sometimes a phony Christian, acting one way but thinking another? Two-faced behavior like that amounts to a double standard in God’s opinion and is a serious offense to him.

A real RolexIt’s important to examine my thoughts and actions carefully and rout out any inconsistencies. I absolutely want to be the genuine article (like the watch at left). Although Nate loved his Rolex, several years after he received it, he put it in a drawer. Believing it was too ostentatious as we struggled to put food on our family table, he felt uncomfortable wearing it and went back to his low-cost watch. Even though I’d bought him the watch, I loved him more for making that choice.

And after that, if any Rolex-wearer noticed his timepiece was an inexpensive model, that was ok by him.

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.” (James 3:13)

Love Without End, Part 2

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Nate loved his stainless steel Rolex watch and got an uptick of pleasure whenever he checked the time. He wore it on his right wrist rather than the traditional left, but one day I noticed he wasn’t wearing it at all. When I asked why, he said, “It’s at Peacock’s, being cleaned.”

Several weeks after that, his wrist was still empty. When I asked about it again he said, “I have it, and its working fine. But I’ve been wondering if I should wear it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, these days it seems ostentatious,” he said.

Rolex watchI was surprised. He’d loved receiving it, wearing it, setting it on the dresser every night. Then why the change of heart? Since he’d started wearing it, much had happened in the real estate and legal worlds, and his thriving business had shriveled to nothing because of governmental law changes. The fact that his partner had suffered a debilitating stroke and never returned to work didn’t help. His rapidly rising income had plummeted, and we were scrimping at home. When Nate looked at the big picture, a Rolex seemed out of place.

Of course I was well acquainted with our over-the-cliff financial picture, but I hadn’t put all the pieces together. The radical changes affected all of us, but they were upsetting Nate the most. His business persona was being overhauled, his finances ruined, his work hours increased, and his tension level off the charts.

One night, I told him I was impressed with his decision about the Rolex. It had been thrilling to receive it and satisfying to wear it, but gradually he saw it as inappropriate, and I saw that as wisdom. Although Nate would not have said he’d been humbled by his losses, that’s how I saw it. And it was good… at least spiritually-speaking.

After the “fall” and a period of despondency, he joined a church small group, began sharing openly with other men, and related to the Sunday sermons in new ways. Although it was a painful reminder of our situation to eat soup for dinner every night for a while, Nate would say after it was all over that he was closer to the Lord and also to me.

Financial deficiencies never entirely disappeared, but Nate’s struggle ended completely on November 3, 2009, financially and in every other way. God had humbled him, and when he deemed the time was right, he lifted him up… way up… to a place where a Rolex or any other kind of watch is never needed.

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.” (1 Peter 5:6)

Love Without End

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Nate once gave me a Rolex watch worth $5000. When I later lost it, I felt awful. It used to be the only people who were given gold watches had earned them by working forty years at the same institution. Retirement and the watch came together, but I hadn’t done a thing to deserve such a fine gift. As always, Nate had been generous to his wife but not to himself, buying the watch he wished he had, for me. His own watch came from Walmart.

When I tried to think of some way to show my remorse over losing the watch, my only idea was to buy a Rolex for him. But I didn’t work outside our home and had no paycheck. The weekly allowance he gave me worked well to manage our household, but the dollars were mostly spoken-for. The only answer was to save a little bit here and there until I finally had enough.

Rolex watch boxIt took me several years.

But the day finally came when I counted $2500 in my plump envelope of bills. I drove to Peacocks Jewelry Store feeling like a Depression-era child about to buy her dream bicycle.

As the salesman spread out the few Rolex designs my money would buy, I chose the one that most resembled the watch he’d chosen for himself years before, for which he’d paid about $25. Before I left the store, I asked if Peacock’s would engrave something on the back:

Love engraved“I’ll love you till the end of time. Your Meg, Christmas, 1985.”

I couldn’t wait for Christmas morning. When it finally arrived, my gift was the hit I’d hoped it would be. Nate was dumbfounded, and he loved my engraved declaration of love on the back.

God also testifies of his deep love for us with an engraving. He says he’s carved us on his palms. In an effort to impress us with the depth of his commitment, he compares a nursing mother and her baby to his relationship with us and asks, “Can a mom forget her nursing child?”

I nursed all my babies. When I’d go out for an evening, leaving the baby at home, my body would always tell me it was time to head home and coax him or her to have an unscheduled meal, just to relieve the pressure. No nursing mother can forget her baby.

God says that in the unlikely case a nursing mother should forget, he never will. To prove it, he engraved us on his palms. Nate’s watch has been set aside now, and eventually it will stop running. But the good news about God’s love is that it’ll never stop.

Not ever.

“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands.” (Isaiah 49:15-16)