Threescore and Ten

Posted on December 8, 2013 by Margaret

Today my sister Mary turned 70. Although she and Bervin were in Minnesota, I was thankful for the phone conversation we were able to have about this special day. Time on the phone was no small favor, since her loving, loyal children all checked in with her, too, making extra chat-time hard to come by.

My only question was, “How do you feel about turning 70?”

Based on Scripture’s verse about a good length of life being threescore and ten years, her immediate response was, “As of today, I’ve had my allotted 70 years, so anything after this is a bonus. My overarching emotion is gratitude for the years I’ve had.”

She talked about the high quality examples in the generation ahead of us, our parents, aunts, and uncles. “They all got old, but none of them got old-and-crotchety. They didn’t complain but instead did a great job modeling how to positively handle aging.”

She talked about the skill of counting blessings. “It isn’t easy when life seems to be falling apart, but the Bible tells us to rejoice always and give thanks in all circumstances. It’s a mandate for us to dwell on the positive. God has been good to me, but he is good to everyone,” she said. “And he wants us to watch for his goodness.”

Mary and I have weathered a number of setbacks together, and I know she’s had reasons to worry during the night. But as she reminded me today, it’s best if we don’t brood too long over the hard times but choose instead to look for marks of God’s involvement. “They’re always there.”

Of course we couldn’t talk about turning 70 without touching on the physical losses. She said, “Yesterday we were watching little kids sled down snowy hills with abandon. I had to admit those days are over for me. But we oldsters get nearly as much pleasure from watching them as they get from sledding.” In other words, it’s not a bad thing to act our age. “I’ve decided I’m not going to dwell on all the things I can’t do, but all the things I still can.”

Then she added, “As the years go by, I know the aches and pains will begin piling up, and we have all that ahead of us. But we also have God’s promise that we won’t go through any of it alone. I agree with that blog post back in 2009 (Flashlight or Floodlight?) that it’s best if we don’t know what’s coming,” she said. “Worrying about tomorrow can subtract the happiness from today. It’s not wise to look too far down the road.”

Amen to that.

“All glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault.” (Jude 1:24)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MARY!

Seasonal Sisterhood (Conclusion)

Posted on December 5, 2013 by Margaret

Yesterday we met 3 women befuddled by the crush of holiday preparation, and I promised we’d look at ways to manage over-commitment in today’s post. Below are 10 suggestions I’ve used, and maybe you readers will offer many more in your comments. The Seasonal Sisterhood needs to stick together!

1. Instead of buying gifts for everyone on your list, divide your gift-receivers into related groups and pick names, one apiece. Buying one nice gift is easier, cheaper, and quicker than purchasing 10 small ones. Our 7 children have done this for years.

2. If your family wants home baked cookies, choose a morning and invite a couple of friends over, with or without children. Ask them to bring their favorite cookie dough, ready for baking. This is a time to talk and laugh together while getting the baking done. Everybody takes home the cookies made with the dough they brought. This became a fun holiday tradition for us.

3. If you’re hiring a babysitter, pick her up one hour earlier than you need her. Drive to a well lit parking lot and use those 60 minutes to slow yourself down. Listen to holiday music with your eyes closed. Read a book. Revise your lists. Pray. Or take a nap. This was often a sanity-saver for me.

4. Resist the temptation to work into the night while your family sleeps. A rested worker is an efficient worker.

5. Cut your Christmas card list in half by eliminating those who don’t reciprocate. If they miss hearing from you, you might hear back from them for the first time in a long while.

6. When you sign up to help at school, church, or in the neighborhood, remember that if you say no, others will come forward with a yes.

7. When you invite people over and they ask what they can bring, have your list ready. They and you will enjoy the evening more with the contribution, and you can share recipes.

8. Wrap all your gifts in the same decorative paper and ribbon. It becomes a signature look and makes a unique holiday display in your home before you distribute them.

9. Pay the children to haul out decorations and put them up. They’ll be wonderfully creative while earning money to buy Christmas gifts for others. Remember to brag on your kids when guests notice your unusual decorating.

10. Check with good friends about exchanging gifts again this year. Maybe it’s become a burden for both of you, and each would appreciate being let off the hook. Share a simple meal instead.

* * * * * * * *

As for the “sister” who ran into Target without turning off her car, she came flying out of the store with her purchase just as I was going back in. When she drove away, she passed me, and I saw a sleeping toddler in the back seat. She had taken a big chance, which shows how desperate The Sisterhood can get.

May we honor our Savior’s coming by saying no to over-commitment and yes to more of him. Just like Jesus’ mother Mary, let’s take time to ponder.

“Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often.” (Luke 2:19)

Seasonal Sisterhood

Posted on December 4, 2013 by Margaret

Unlike most women, I don’t like shopping, not for clothes, food, household items, or anything else. It’s time-consuming and often unfruitful, which then requires a second day’s effort on the same task. The result of all my negativity is that by the time I finally venture out with a list, there are 8 or 9 stops on it, almost enough to debilitate a non-shopper. And during the holidays? The list covers both sides of the paper.

My irritability showed recently as I walked into Target, ready to tackle item #6. Taking time for a quick bathroom stop, I stood in front of the red door pushing the button on my car key’s remote control.

When it wouldn’t open, I stretched my arm out straight, much like a TV watcher, clicking my “unlock” button like crazy. It was the word “PUSH” printed on the door that straightened me out, and I wondered how many people behind me were enjoying a good laugh.

When I finally had a cart, I realized I’d left my list on the car dashboard. But heading back to the parking lot, I found out there were other shoppers worse off than me. A woman two parking spots down was in such a hurry she jumped out of her car, slammed the door, and raced toward the store without turning off her engine. I decided to get in my car and wait a minute to see what would happen.

As I sat there, another holiday shopper pulled into the spot in front of me. Then she did something funny. She wrapped her arms around her steering wheel like she was giving it a hug, putting her face on her arms. Was she crying? Napping? Praying?

Deciding she just needed a moment, I left her alone and headed back to Target, this time with my list. Immediately inside a woman was wrestling her cranky toddler into a cart, his pajamas sticking out from under his jacket. Her preschooler was standing next to her, also still in pj’s.

These women all belong to The Sisterhood of the Over-Committed when it comes to Christmas prep. It’s the extra baking, entertaining, gift-wrapping, decorating, addressing Christmas cards, and for moms of school children, attending programs, keeping track of holiday clothes, parties, grab bag gifts, and teacher presents that make December an over-committed month. It’s what brings women together in a Target parking lot, all of whom have been pressed to the point of acting irrationality.

God is hoping the birth of Jesus will be our #1 priority at this time of year, not just in our hearts but in our actions.

But when we get spread too thin, much of the joy he wants us to experience evaporates, and we can’t wait for the season to end. Surely this isn’t the way to celebrate our Savior’s arrival.