It’s our choice.

Posted on August 20, 2013 by Margaret

Although I’m home after a 12 day trip to England, pieces of my mind and heart are still over there. Often during the day I’ll check the clock and add 5 hours to mentally get back into their routine for a few minutes. Also, looking at weather.com for what’s happening outside their windows is another way I can move closer while still being far away.

Any time I’m able to spend concentrated time with my grandchildren, I find myself newly appreciating the great variety among the 9 of them and see again the extent of God’s marvelous creativity. Though all humans have much in common, the diversity is astounding.

The other day in England Katy and I were having a lunchtime chat with Nicholas, Thomas and Evelyn when the subject of musical instruments came up. As we talked about Katy’s musical background and talents, Evelyn piped up, “I’m going to play a trumpet!” nodding her head for emphasis as if to say, “It’s a sure thing!”

Thomas quickly chimed in, “I’m going to play the tambourine!” and Nicholas calmly said, “I want to play a flute.”

Later, Katy and I talked about how the personalities God had implanted in these three children showed through in their instrument choices. Evelyn is vivacious, strong-willed, and spirited, a perfect match for the trumpet. Thomas is deliberate, friendly, and emotional, a good pairing with a tambourine. And Nicholas is detailed and soft-spoken with a quirky sense of humor, joining nicely with the flute.

Their choices of instruments that day were, in a way, outward expressions of their inner makeup. But isn’t that true for all of us? The choices we make reveal who we are.

The same holds true for God. If we read Scripture with the intent of understanding him better, all we have to do is study his choices. For example, he chooses to extend grace, though he lets us suffer consequences for what we do. He also chooses to discipline us when we rebel against him but to love us no matter what. But best of all, he chooses to save us from judgment rather than to let us experience what we deserve.

In looking at those choices and hundreds more in the Bible, we get a glimpse of who God really is, deep down. By that, we come to know him better (though I don’t believe we’ll ever know him completely) and love him more.

Interestingly, God wants to study the choices we make, too, and not just which musical instruments we choose to play. He’s far more interested in our spiritual choices, and in particular, whether or not we’ll choose him. And maybe part of deciding one way or another about what to do is to be sure we learn as much as possible about the One hoping we will choose him.

After all, he’s already chosen us.

“Choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve.” (Joshua 24:15)

Flying Home

Posted on August 19, 2013 by Margaret

Every vacation ends eventually, and today was lift-off day for me. When I got to the breakfast table, 3 sad small fry greeted me. “Why are you going back to America today, MeeMee?”

It was a distressing question, because no reason was good enough for them. So I just said, “I’ll be coming back to see you later!”

“By dinner?” Thomas said.

“Not that soon…”

Nicholas, Evelyn, and Thomas are too young to grasp the difficulty of frequent comings and goings across so many time zones, and I felt like I was abandoning them. My only consolation was that out of sight is often out of mind for young children. Maybe they won’t miss me as much as I’ll miss them.

Airport goodbyes were teary, and little Evelyn kissed me on the lips multiple times: “One for Auntie Weez, one for Auntie Britt, for Den-Den (Nelson), Uncle Lars, Uncle Batis (Klaus), Auntie Brooke,” and on and on it went until my face was dripping wet with her sweet kisses.

Nicholas simply said, “I don’t want you to go, MeeMee.”

But as I rolled my suitcases toward the terminal in a British drizzle, I looked back and saw them pull away, crestfallen faces pressed against the car windows, little hands waving. Ouch to my heart.

Once the plane had been boarded and had made its way to the end of a runway with engines rumbling, the captain came on the intercom to say we’d be delayed by 15 minutes. He couldn’t find the flight plan and had to make a new one. Though this was unsettling, at least we weren’t turning back toward the gate.

These days airplanes have TV screens up and down the aisles on which a video is played to make plane-orientation fun. Since most of our flight will be above an ocean, I paid careful attention to the demonstration on life jackets. “Don’t inflate until you’re already outside,” it said, showing a man in a business suit in a flat life vest, standing at the airplane door. He’s smiling broadly as he’s about to jump into the ocean. I pictured myself floating in the icy water watching our wounded plane go under, much like the Titanic did in the movie.

Traveling is stressful; traveling alone is more so. I had to remind myself that even if our plane went down, my “bottom line” was secure. When it was all over, I knew I’d end up with Jesus.

This morning at breakfast, Evelyn asked a funny question: “Do you think your airplane is going to fall out of the sky?”

I laughed and showed her, with my hand, how my plane would take off, cruise, and then land gently on a runway. Today my flight did exactly that, but even if it hadn’t, my ending would have been a good one.

“We are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord.” (2 Corinthians 5:8)

Happy Birthday, Nate…

Posted on August 18, 2013 by Margaret

Every year on your birthday I look forward to writing you, even though I know my letter can’t be delivered. In the back of my mind, though, there’s always the possibility that by God’s doing, you just might be able to read it.

In thinking back on this past year, I realize I haven’t had a single dream about you. I’ve talked with other widows who occasionally “meet” their men in dreams and cherish these encounters as if they were real events. I confess I too have put my head on the pillow hoping you might appear that night, but it hasn’t happened recently.

That’s ok, though, because the few times we’ve met in dreams ended with your contented departure and my fretful resistance to it. But if I could meet you for real, I’d ask about every detail of your life in Paradise. Scripture tells me you’re in the presence of Jesus, surely a rich place of worship and learning.

When Jesus was on earth, he taught crowds of people who often scratched their heads in confusion at what he said. But I’ll bet you understand him perfectly now. How glorious!

As far as your earthly family goes, last week I gained another birthday increase, once again celebrating without my birthday buddy. But I’m getting used to it, since you’ve been gone for nearly 4 years. I still don’t like it, but I no longer cry.

Our family continues to expand with the birth of grandson Andrew Kenneth last spring. With 4 children ages 4 and under, Katy and Hans sure do lead lively lives, but they’re well organized and tackle all of it together. You’d be proud of this son of yours, once so disorganized but now efficient and productive. I’ve just spent a week and a half with them, and it’s a good thing I took my vitamins before I got there!

When I write to you next summer, Linnea and Adam’s fourth baby (due in January) will have revealed his or her name, face, and personality. They’re hoping it will be another smooth home birth, and I’m hoping to be part of it! We’ll miss you in a special way as we rejoice over that new little life.

The rest of your family is thriving in multiple categories, although none of your kids or kids-in-law are free of challenges. Three are job-hunting, one is a full time university student, several are financially tight, one is about to launch a web site, and one has been offered a teaching position in missions.

Most importantly, each is steadily walking toward God. None of them have taken the giant leap you have, right into his presence, but none of them is standing still either. And it’s a daily encouragement that while you’re living face-to-face with Jesus and other believers in Paradise, Jesus is also living with us, through his Spirit.

I miss you every day, Nate, and am earnestly looking forward to the time when faith in Christ will become sight of him, because then we’ll all be together.