Helping the Needy

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Most of us can remember a time when we’ve needed the help of someone else, which can be a humbling experience. I well remember a time when the recipient of help was me.

Linnea en route.

In 1977 when Nate and I were expecting baby #3, I was having a hard time. Pregnancies #1 and #2 had been problem-free, but the third had presented a new problem: varicose veins. The OB sent me to a specialist, who looked at my swollen legs, crossed his arms and said, “Stay off your feet, or I’ll have to put you in a bed.” (Nelson was 4 at the time, Lars was 2, and I was on my feet most of every day.)

Before I left his office, he applied compression bandages to my legs, gave me a prescription for heavy custom-made stockings, and sent me home to put my feet up. When I gave the details to Nate, he just shook his head and grimaced, not knowing how we would make it through.

Rolled poster

Several days later, I was working a shift in the church nursery when several girlfriends arrived at the door carrying a rolled-up poster. “For you,” Miriam said, handing it to me. “We want to help.”

I couldn’t imagine what she meant, but when I unrolled it, I saw a giant calendar that included every remaining week of my pregnancy, plus one more. A different friend’s name was written on each week. “We’re going to do all your household chores for you,” Miriam said, “one of us each week.”

I couldn’t believe it! Each of them had babies and toddlers of their own, along with chore lists, families, and houses to tend to. I responded by blubbering, “Oh, you don’t have to do that! I’ll be fine!” But they said, “It’s not up for negotiation. Like it or not, we’re coming.”

The Helpers

I’ve never forgotten their touching gift, and Nate was deeply grateful, too. Their hard work on our behalf also made an impression on our young boys, and most importantly, God appreciated it.

Scripture tells us that whenever someone helps the needy, God is pleased. Not only that, but he lines up special blessings for those helpers. And there’s more. He makes careful note of their work, preparing lavish rewards for them that will last throughout eternity.

My girlfriends followed through on their chart, arriving at my house according to their scheduled times. They kept my home and family running better than I ever had, and if that wasn’t enough, each week the scheduled worker brought dinner for that evening.

And now we're three.

Baby Linnea eventually arrived safely, and several months after her birth, my veins were corrected through surgery. And the bottom line for my friends? The effects of their good deeds will literally last forever.

“Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.” (1 Corinthians 15:58)

It’s too hard…

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Motherhood is exhaustingMotherhood is exhausting, the most difficult job on earth. It’s a massive responsibility, it’s emotionally draining, and it’s around-the-clock.

No young woman can properly prepare for what her own motherhood will be like. She can read books, ask veteran moms, babysit for other people’s children, and make detailed preparations while she’s pregnant. But when the baby actually arrives, she’s in for an incredible shock. Surrendering virtually all of her prior freedoms isn’t easy, and sometimes she sheds tears over the many sacrifices her new role forces her to make.

“Is it too much to ask for a single night’s sleep?” she says.

The answer is yes.

But what about the babies being mothered? Women sometimes view them as tiny dictators who rule without mercy, but in reality babyhood isn’t easy either. For example, our little Emerald is in the early stages of teething. She drools like a waterfall and continually gnaws on her pudgy fists, biting down hard with her toothless gums.

Gnawing fists

Every so often, while in a good mood and playing happily with her rattles,  she cries out in pain. That’s because her baby incisors are slowly cutting their way through her gums, forcing a path where none exists. And it hurts! So as her mom endures the hard work of parenting, she’s enduring, too.

Most of us find it difficult to see a situation from another’s point of view. We look from the outside and make the best analysis we can, but without experiencing it ourselves, we can’t really know. Fathers can’t be mothers, which sometimes frustrates the mothers. But mothers can’t be fathers, either, and aren’t able to fully understand the emotions and stresses of that role.

Jesus was (and is) a pro at analyzing the needs of others. That’s because he willingly dropped from royal status to commoner, a supernatural downgrade beyond our understanding. When we talk about freedoms being taken away, he forfeited the most. And Scripture lets us know the reason: to become one of us.

He stepped inside the experience of overworked mothers, teething babies, burdened fathers, and all the rest. And because of that, he’s the one exception to the general truth that no one fully understands someone else’s plight. Actually, he does.

So when young mothers feel no one knows how thoroughly spent they are, they should know that Jesus does. All of us can be confident he’s “on the inside” of our struggles and pressures, since he can accurately say, “I’ve been there. I know exactly how you feel.”Not yet, but someday

And as soon as little Emerald can say the word Jesus (which will be right after she gets her first teeth), we’ll tell her all about him.

Jesus… “understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.” (Hebrews 4:15-16)

Hard to Focus

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It’s been snowing again in Michigan, bringing winter’s unique beauty to the landscape. In an effort to send a picture-text to my grandchildren, I’ve tried again and again to capture a blizzard-in-progress. But the camera, whether it’s my phone or the old fashioned kind, has trouble knowing what to focus on.

Unfocused snow

One picture will be of a distant tree with blurred snowflakes in the foreground. The next might highlight one snowflake with everything else unclear.

People can have the same problem, not sure what should be the main focus. A husband might zero in on his job, which then blurs his commitment to his family. A wife might make her children the focal point, which isn’t fair to her husband. And for those of us who are Christians, our main focus can easily stray from the Lord and his Word.

But how can we check ourselves against focusing on the wrong things?

The first step is to decide what our main focus should be, just like a camera chooses one small part of a complicated scene to hone in on. My iPhone camera has a focus feature that activates as I touch the part of the picture I want it to focus on. A small blue square pops up in response to my finger, and when I “click” the camera shutter button, that area of the picture comes out in sharp focus.

The problem with photographing snowflakes is that they’re always moving. A camera’s focus-feature gets confused when it can’t successfully zero in on one item.

That’s true for us, too. When everything in our world keeps changing, we get confused about how to keep the main thing the main thing. It may even be difficult to determine what the main thing ought to be. And that’s why it’s important we choose to focus on those things that never change. As far as I know, it’s a very short list: (1) God, and (2) his Word. If I let my focus wander from those, life can get blurry in a hurry.

We can know beyond all doubt that God is who he says he is and will do what he says he’ll do. He won’t waver, change, or back away from any of his promises. And the intense love he has for us will never lessen.

Five fingers

Back in the 1960’s when Dad took Kodachrome pictures on a manual-focus camera, he’d line up his subjects in an effort to get a family photo but would have trouble finding someone to focus on who wasn’t wiggling. So he’d say, “Someone hold up five fingers and keep them still!” He’d turn his lens until the fingers were perfectly focused and then click the shutter. Because the faces were gathered around the hand, the whole group was perfectly in focus.

It works the same way when we close in tight to the Lord. Finding the right focus is easy after that.

“The Lord’s plans stand firm forever; his intentions can never be shaken.” (Psalm 33:11)