Every year on your birthday I look forward to writing you, even though I know my letter can’t be delivered. In the back of my mind, though, there’s always the possibility that by God’s doing, you just might be able to read it.
In thinking back on this past year, I realize I haven’t had a single dream about you. I’ve talked with other widows who occasionally “meet” their men in dreams and cherish these encounters as if they were real events. I confess I too have put my head on the pillow hoping you might appear that night, but it hasn’t happened recently.
That’s ok, though, because the few times we’ve met in dreams ended with your contented departure and my fretful resistance to it. But if I could meet you for real, I’d ask about every detail of your life in Paradise. Scripture tells me you’re in the presence of Jesus, surely a rich place of worship and learning.
When Jesus was on earth, he taught crowds of people who often scratched their heads in confusion at what he said. But I’ll bet you understand him perfectly now. How glorious!
As far as your earthly family goes, last week I gained another birthday increase, once again celebrating without my birthday buddy. But I’m getting used to it, since you’ve been gone for nearly 4 years. I still don’t like it, but I no longer cry.
Our family continues to expand with the birth of grandson Andrew Kenneth last spring. With 4 children ages 4 and under, Katy and Hans sure do lead lively lives, but they’re well organized and tackle all of it together. You’d be proud of this son of yours, once so disorganized but now efficient and productive. I’ve just spent a week and a half with them, and it’s a good thing I took my vitamins before I got there!
When I write to you next summer, Linnea and Adam’s fourth baby (due in January) will have revealed his or her name, face, and personality. They’re hoping it will be another smooth home birth, and I’m hoping to be part of it! We’ll miss you in a special way as we rejoice over that new little life.
The rest of your family is thriving in multiple categories, although none of your kids or kids-in-law are free of challenges. Three are job-hunting, one is a full time university student, several are financially tight, one is about to launch a web site, and one has been offered a teaching position in missions.
Most importantly, each is steadily walking toward God. None of them have taken the giant leap you have, right into his presence, but none of them is standing still either. And it’s a daily encouragement that while you’re living face-to-face with Jesus and other believers in Paradise, Jesus is also living with us, through his Spirit.
I miss you every day, Nate, and am earnestly looking forward to the time when faith in Christ will become sight of him, because then we’ll all be together.
But for now, please remember how much I love you.
From the one you used to call “your Meg.”