I remember the days when one or more of my children would say, “Where is my such-and-such?” I might answer with something like, “Try the basement.” (Or garage, or yard.) But like clockwork they’d quickly return saying, “Nope. Not there.”

Knowing it was, I’d send them back again, maybe with another clue. “Look about chest-high. I think I saw it there.”

But more often than not, they’d reappear. “Un-uh. Still not there.”

So I’d roll my eyes, march to the spot where the item was, put my hand right on it and say, “See? Exactly where I said it was.”

“Oh….” he/she would say. “I was looking for a box, but it was in a bag.” Or, “I was looking on the floor, but was on a shelf.” In other words, “It’s not my fault.”

Sometimes I act the same toward God. I ask a question, and he answers by giving me helpful information, like where to find peace or maybe security, or courage. But rather than carefully following his instructions I say, “Doing that doesn’t seem like it’ll bring peace.” Or, “Relying on that won’t make me feel secure.” Or, “Just believing words can’t give me courage.”

Surely God must roll his eyes. “Look where I’m telling you to find it, and you’ll find it.”

With my kids, the problem was they didn’t really want to look. Instead they wanted me to stop what I was doing, lead them to the item they were pretending to look for, and hand it directly to them. Watching this happen repeatedly produced plenty of frustration in me, exactly as it must for God when I become that same immature child.

So how can these seek-and-find scenarios be improved? What’s missing? First and foremost, a listening ear. When parents tell their children where to find something, the kids aren’t really listening to the details. They’re hoping for a quick fix, a way to get what they want without putting forth personal effort. Sadly, I’m the same way.

When I’m seeking self-control, for example, or love, or patience, God describes how to find them, but his directions usually include action at my end, and that’s both disappointing and discouraging in the moment. I want it right away and without effort. When it isn’t forthcoming, I run back to him and whine. “Nope. I don’t have it! It’s not there!”

He tells me again (and maybe again) what I must do to secure what I’m wanting, but I don’t succeed unless I “look” where he points and move in that direction. I know the Lord views us as his children, a privileged place to be. But on this issue, I want to act less like a child and more like the mature believer he hopes I will someday become.

“If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” (Proverbs 18:13)